cpausti

awwwww ilu2kthxbai

UnknownEric

 

The number one song when I was born was "Mull of Kintyre" by Paul McCartney.

Which explains why I go for gold bricking, one-legged former models.

 

And I also start a new job on april 2nd.   

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

jes_lawson

Selling your body for cocaine not work out as originally planned?

BigFrank105

Selling your body for cocaine not work out as originally planned?

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It worked too well. The Russians and the Acton Boys are mad, and I'm running fast. If anyone asks you about Project Skibunny, you know nothing.

 

 

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

little_kitty

What are computer "problems?"

My friend got a new iMac and it came with their media viewer and a nifty little remote. Apparently they all come so that they'll work with any Mac, and you just need to synch the two so that only your remote will work on your Mac.

Apparently this is a step most people fail to take, so any remote will do the job, as ">these guys found out at a tradeshow.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

ivytheplant

What are computer "problems?"

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Well, a friend of mine that works there (at the new job I will be attending) said that someone called him once and said " my computer doesn't work. I think something with windows xp"

friend: "did you install windows xp?"

customer: "you have to install it?"

 

Yeeeeah. It should be interesting.

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Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

Here's an interview I just did with writer-producer-director Brendan Foley of JOHNNY WAS (starring Vinnie Jones) and the upcoming THE RIDDLE and BOG BODY!

Brendan Foley interview

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

I just found out that this girl I had been courting on myspace is 200lbs.

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obscenity filter is off

We always knew you liked 'em fat and sloppy.

Her arms are bigger than mine...and I have some HUGE fucking arms...sorry the all this steroid talk has me all pumped up and oily...

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obscenity filter is off

You know, they say fat chicks give the best head because they're so hungry...

No fat chicks give the best head because they've been using oral sex as a way to get men to look past their fatness for years. They are good because of practice. Practice makes perfect.

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You don't know what I got... .

i'm never one to turn down a good bj

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obscenity filter is off

I was just watching Smallville and had the great fortune of watching Lois Lane (wearing a red vunyl bodysuit) seduce a hot lipstick lesbian security guard (formerly in a naughty Catholic schoolgirl outfit) right before kicking her ass.

Oh Superman's girlfriend Lois Lane, how you have changed.

Let's not mention things like this unless there are video clips along with it. I just can't jerk off to text descriptions.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

For those of you who have seen the movie "300", my friends and I made our own little spoof over spring break:

">

Do you have the second part where you get naked and have that other kind of swordfight?

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

ivytheplant

I need to start watching Smallville!

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I has a flavor!

its raining.

 

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Kill Whitey.

My son has pink eye. As far as I know, he hasn't been hanging out with Scott Baio.

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I has a flavor!

AngryAmerican

It's snowing.

All the girls are ho-ing.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

gabe_billings

Yeah, but mandingo owns the rights to it and I can repost it here.

BigFrank105

Yeah, but mandingo owns the rights to it and I can repost it here.

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i sit alone in my dark basement and watch it hour after hour. it completes me

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what if nigger meant kite