No, but your cigar et a bum.

Why does Sweden look like a limp penis?

---
Blue is the color of victory.

Because Italy looks like a boot, stupid.

Why is a cunt called a vagina?

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Because it just is.

So, who likes strapons?

---
Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

quote:

---

Because it just is.

So, who likes strapons?

---

Actually, I think you may just be the very essence of beauty.

Why are lesbians so hot?

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Because extra penises aren't very hot in a sexual fantasy.

What the heck does the "scroll lock" key do?

---
Blue is the color of victory.

It locks scrolls, dumbshit.

Wanna be a member? Wanna be a member?

No. Okay, yes.

Did you talk about Fight Club?

---
Blue is the color of victory.

No! I never talk about anyone behind their back! That would be so childish!

What would be worse, sticking a used toilet brush up your nose or sticking a popsicle stick from the garbage up your butt?

---
I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Sticking a toilet garbage in your popsicle stick from the butt brush.

Sinep or anigav?

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

42.

Who wants to have birthday cake and ice cream after supper?

---
I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Only if it's not a euphamism.

What if God was one of us?

---
I think, therefore I make comments on a forum.

He'd be a dirty hippie. That's what happened last time.

Why is the sky red?

---
Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Because you're colorblind. Its actually purple! Everyone knows that!

Why can't I go to the circus, Mommy?

---
I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Because your face would stampede the elephants. Now shut the fuck up, you disgusting little accident.

What's the most fun way to die?

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

I'm not sure, but after what you just said to me you're going to find out the least fun way to die.

So, what would you like on your tombstone?

---
I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

"Dead And Loving It."

What do you think about when you masturbate?

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Baseball and Apple Pie (preferably warm).

Who put the pump in the jam?

---
Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

Technotronic

If you were approached by three horses in the middle of the night and were forced to choose, would their speech patterns affect your choice?

Only if one of them speaks like Emo Phillips.

Are you there, God?

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Yes, yes I am. Do me a favour and go down to the gym and deliver this Important Message to Cody. My Message is

"Cody is a big fat gay"

In the fullness of time, he will understand.

Do-oo you, you? Feel like we do?

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

No-o. I feel like John Kerry does. Like I want some hay and a nice mare.

Can I get a witness?

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

I plead the 5th. I'd also plead the 69th, but I don't like begging too much.

Why is spanking children so erotic?

---
"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

It isn't. Oh, and btw, there was a detective here a while ago, asking about you.

What did he say?

---
I think, therefore I make comments on a forum.