fpd
Doctor of Fine Parody
Member Rated:
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I had my fun with my derivative, hyper-literal, largely plaigiarized entry. This one is my more original, imaginative entry.
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Back before I came to rule the Inferno, it was ruled by a vain fellow named Satan.
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| I'm better than everyone else, and I'll prove it by inflicting as much pain as possible. | |
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| No more! Please, no more! | |
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Although Satan inflicted great pain, the Inferno was also rich with orgasms.
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| Oh yes! Oh yes! Ooh! Aah! Oh, the pain! Aagh! | |
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Orgasms were the only physical pleasure allowed. All else was agony.
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| By keeping the memory of pleasure fresh, I keep the pain at an agonizing peak. | |
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| And the hope for orgasmic pleasure discourages souls from going numb to the pain. | |
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The orgasmic wealth of the Inferno stirred discontent in the Underworld.
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| If only we could have orgasms too, Lord of the Flies. | |
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| With my armies of the undead, we shall raid the Inferno. | |
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Beelzebub, lord of the Underworld, also had a personal reason for invading the Inferno.
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| Satan thinks he's better than me, does he? Well, I'll show him! | |
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So Beelzebub brought together ghosts and ghouls to invade the Inferno.
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| Wahoo! We're going to get the orgasms! | |
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| Orgasms, must have orgasms. | |
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Beelzebub's armies hit the Inferno with laxative bombs.
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| Woo hoo! We're going to bomb the crap out of you suckers! | |
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| As if the afterlife wasn't already hell. | |
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All the crapping interrupted many orgasms.
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| Oh no, how can I have my orgasm when my partner is crapping. Oh the pain. Aaaghh! | |
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The Inferno became a sticky and slipperly place, and the ghosts and ghouls easily overwhelmed the devils.
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| Woo hoo hoo! We're going to get you. | |
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| I'm not cleaning up this mess. I'm outta here. | |
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After Beelzebub conquered the Inferno, it was no longer as inhospitable as it used to be.
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| And it's so nice to enjoy orgasms without the pain. | |
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But this attracted lots of the wrong kind of folk to the Inferno.
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| Let's go off to the Inferno and torture up some folks. | |
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| Sounds like fun! Let's go! | |
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Beelzebub didn't like this one bit.
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| I didn't carry out Operation: Inferno Freedom just to let sadists wreck our hedonistic revelling. | |
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| Pluto may know what to do. His neice gave real good head back at our corporate headquarters in Hell. | |
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| I want you guys to build a wide river all around the Inferno. We'll call it Styx. | |
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I made passage to the Inferno possible only through a high-priced ferry.
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| I'd like to go to the Inferno. | |
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| That will be $1,000 please. | |
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Things are much better now. The Inferno became a high-class pleasure resort for the dead, and I married my neice.
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| Ah, my lovely Persephone, they were right. You do give good head. | |
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| Yeah, but I'm off to visit mother now. See you later, Pluto. | |
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This story has been fiction. If you believe it and wind up dead or in hell, don't blame me.
--- FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.
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