all right, so i finally gave into the wily charms of the stick figure guy with the hammer and what-not:

so... well, i know all of you have too, and i want to see what you did with him! show me your hammer-man strips, or pay the price (five tons of flax).

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

What up dawg, thats a great idea!

Here's one I like, though I think it makes the reader work too hard.

The blind man by evil_d 2-16-01

"'I see,' said the blind man, as he picked up his hammer and saw." Well, that's the last time I take advice from a clever pun.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

My very first comic. It wasn't supposed to be "funny," in the laugh out loud sense. It was supposed to be introspective.

Tales of Human Drama by Drexle 6-01-01

Human Drama: Act 1 You shall be doomed to an existance of obscurity, regret, and lonlines... This is about "her" isn't it? You who would forsake and violate that which means most to you deserve naught but to suffer in his misery. Yes... My only salvation is through my suffering... *sniffle* What a happy ending! For you... I suffer for you, my dear... I'm sorry...

I heart Hammerman

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www.bradsucks.net

evil_d: that wasn't too much work. i only had to read it twice (:

drexle: "introspective" isn't the word you're looking for. try "bummer."

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

quote:

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drexle: "introspective" isn't the word you're looking for. try "bummer."

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The two are synonymous with me. ;)

i know what you mean; as a general rule, my inner monologue resembles "alas, poor yorick" as well. of course, sometimes i look into my soul and see something funny...

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

FUCK!

replace "soul" in that last sentence with "mirror."

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

The sacrifices an artist must make... by DexX 1-08-01

Damn! I can't think of a punchline for this Low Pass cartoon... Can I help? The first panel has a clown telling a little girl to give him oral sex, and she tells him to go away, quite rudely too. Uh-huh... then the second panel has a dog on a ball propositioning a heavily pixelated woman with a suggestive smile. I know! If I give myself a lobotomy, I am SURE to think of a punchline as good as any of the ones on this site! Seems to have worked for everybody else.

I didn't use the hammer-head man until my seventh comic! Of course, we had a much smaller selection of characters to use at that stage, so I was required to use it sooner, you see...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

...and then there's this little fella, who used to have a degree of notoriety back in the day...

Caveat Empty - Let The Buyer Be Stupid by DexX 1-08-01

Introducing an amazing advance in comic-strip writing technology - the LOBOTOMITRON 5000 After one simple application, you will find yourself writing Low Pass comic strips with the best of them! Ow! Only $299.99!!! To order, call 1800-RIP-OFF. our operators are standing by to take your call now! If they are waiting for me now, I'd better call... ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!!!

Note that I hadn't gotten the hang of the bewildering catchphrase by that point.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Take note of this, kids. Less than two days after the site was launched, people were already complaining about the quality of the comics. If any of us ever start talking about "the good old days", smack us.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

In the good old days, the total number of strips was fewer than the number Gabe has done now.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

Hey, it ain't just me. I think Obi has more, and he was gone for a couple months. And DX has almost as many as both of us, but a third of his were made on the same day when he was hopped up on Grape Robitussin and quaaludes.

As for the Exploding Dog hammer guy, he's without a doubt my favorite character. I wouldn't be surprised if he's in half of my comics. I'll see if I can pluck out some gems...

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

All in a Day's Work by gabe_billings 1-24-01

So what's on the agenda for today? I'm not sure. Better check the schedule. First we tar and feather the entire cast of 'Family Circus'. Then we shave Garfield. Finally we burn down Brenda Starr's house. If we have time maybe we can swing by Rex Morgan's office and rip shit up. We should do the thing with the nails again. Yeah. That always scares the hell out of them.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

I've always felt this is what my friend's feel like when I tell them about my dreams. Doesn't stop me though.

[hr]

Dreamweaver... get me through the night. by israphael 9-02-01

Dude, I had the weirdest dream last night. I met my ex-wife and her lesbian lover. Of course my ex is not a lesbian, so I suppose her lover represents her new husband. Anyway, I tag along with them to a steak restaurant. They're making out in the booth right in front of me. But I think, "OK, at least I'll get a good steak dinner." But when I get my order, it's lime jello with grated carrots. So I go into the kitchen to complain and they put me to work. My job is to xerox and collate a 134 page report. The weird part is... Damn I can still hear him. I either need bigger nails or a bigger hammer.

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

Take note of this, kids. Less than two days after the site was launched, people were already complaining about the quality of the comics. If any of us ever start talking about "the good old days", smack us.

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Somebody complained to me about the quality of comics when it was just in beta testing, even.

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www.bradsucks.net

I just read your strips, Isrpahel... you're damn funny.

This isn't.

Jesus at play by andydougan 3-08-01

There! That oughta teach you to go around saying you're the son of God! I hate to tell you this... But I actually AM the son of God. You're going to go to Hell unless you hammer a nail into your own forehead. What a spaz.

Neither is this.

A silly way to behave by andydougan 7-11-01

I'll give you ten quid if you hammer a nail into the part of your brain which governs memory. You're on! Now, hand over my...er, what was I going to ask for again? If you didn't see that one coming, you've got nails in your head.

The Jesus one was funny... and I'll spell Israphael's name right one day...