People don't believe me when I tell them I'm from the Ozarks. I figure it doesn't help that the rednecks there don't consider me a native unless I was third generation born there. And though my family is all from the Midwest, I can't really claim that since I wasn't born there at all. And I can never claim Wyoming nativeness since I moved here for school.
So I am adrift in the cosmos and I laugh at the last two comics because it's all true.
If your slow-ass computer was a WalMart employee, it would be fired for putting up Christmas stuff in November instead of October or Valentine's stuff up in January instead of December.