Sorry; I didn't expect my brilliance to be recognized in my lifetime.

Here it is:

Don't change any characters or backgrounds in any way EXCEPT you can change the temple to the desert island if you want. Replace the ___s with dialog or get rid of them. Judging sometime after I get back from Hawaii.

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To whoever hosts after me:
POST THESE LINKS
AND POST THAT THE NEXT HOST SHOULD POST THESE LINKS.
... and the host after that.
HOSTS! Read this first.
Awards List (Paste at judging)
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This is not going to happen. But I'm posting it here for posterity.

PS In-jokes will lose.

Love,
Scyess

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"Old" is the old new.

Sorry, but I don't really know how to do the Italic thing. And I changed the Dialog box to a thought box.

Hope it's good enough for you Scyess.

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Crash. Bang. Krrrsh. Uhhhhn. Crash. Bang. Krrrsh. Click. Blam. Onomatopoeia.

FTC Sixty Ate by mandingo 7-18-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but you ate all the catalysts-- the white condiment, tart berries, green herb, even the grape jam. oh grow up, Ais. i was hungry WELL I AM HUNGRY TOO AND MY HUNGER MUST BE SATISFIED i'm really sorry man, Ais. i cranberry bay leaf uvate my sand witch.

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what if nigger meant kite

WTFTC 68: Risks of an Organic Diet by kaufman 7-18-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but a lady of the evening like you really shouldn't fake physical agony. And just what is that supposed to mean? Your propane is bologna. She banished me to this island for punning. And you? For rebroadcasting, retransmitting or other use of the pictures, descriptions and accounts of the game without the express written consent of Major League Baseball.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

FTC 68 - Wanna F******* (frenchfry) by flipynif1 7-19-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but.... The expression of a Poly-Glutamine-Ataxin-3 Transgene in Orexin Neurons Induces Narcolepsy–Cataplexy in the Rat. You've been watching Discovery™ without me?? Who is he, WHO IS THE OTHER MAN YOU WITCH!! RAHHHH *stab stab stab* He's right over there... *GAAAAGGG* Dying...dying...neurons no longer flashin... Wanna fuck?

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I dumb :D

FTC 68: Chemistry Tonight by friendy 7-24-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but I think I’ll just demonstrate it instead. Wow, watching chemical experiments, what can be more interesting! TO BE A REAGENT IN ONE , APPARENTLY!!! Hey, Mary, stop! I’m just kidding. This knife is fake! AHHHHHH!!! Mary, I don’t know how to make it up to you but … WHAT!!!??? TOM!!!??? Yes, Bob, that’s me. We changed costumes with Mary. By the way, you are so recognizable in that costume, so next Halloween please try something more original.

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Disclaimer: Sorry if some of my comics are offensive to somebody. They are created in a light-hearted mood and aren’t intended to hurt anyone.

FTC 68: Sperm + Egg = Killers by biped 7-24-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but then I'd have to assassinate President Kennedy...again. I assassinated Martin Luther King...TWICE! BECAUSE he explained the chemical reactions of hydrobarbons to lunchmeat to me...TWICE! I ASSASSINATED ABRAHAM LINCOLN A HUNDRED TIMES BECAUSE HE WOULDN'T TICKLE MY SCROTUM A HUN -- hey, where are you going? I'm off to assassinate a WHOLE BUNCH of REALLY IMPORTANT world leaders! Later, ASSHOLE! SHE SHOT MY DAD! MINE, TOO! THEY WERE JUST TOO IMPORTANT TO LIVE!

FTC 68: The Bad Spur-Of-The-Moment Idea by biped 7-24-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but I'd rather tell you about Mr. Winky-Dinky Bear and the three puppies. OH BOY, ME LOVE MR. WINKY-DINKY BEAR! But me never hear the story about the three puppies...tell me about them! Tell me! TELL ME! NO! I WILL CUT A BIG HOLE IN YOUR BACK AND PUT THE STORY IN THERE INSTEAD! HURRY UP! CUT ME OPEN AND PUT THE STORY ABOUT MR. WINKY-DINKY BEAR AND THE THREE PUPPIES IN THERE! NOW! ...and...and she died while I was trying to put the story in the hole...I didn't know how... I...DIDN'T... KNOW... HOW... Huh. Well, I didn't kill anybody. I'm just here because I won a horse-masturbating contest on "Fear Factor."

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

FTC 68: What to do when a pun flies high by flipynif1 7-26-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but it a bunch of bologna. You son of a BIIIIITCH!!!!! It's not Bologna it's REAL LIFE!! THIS IS REAL!! LIKE VIDEO GAMES! Uh, I was trying to be funny, Hey wanna stick this knife up your cunt? Let me review my Polish sex manual: In, Out, repeat if neccesary. Sure. The next day.... Uh, I was trying to be funny, Hey wanna stick these flowers up your dickhole? YES!!!

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I dumb :D

I realize this contest was really hard. I did that for two reasons: 1) to see who was up to the challenge, and 2) because I didn't have the time or the inclination to think up a decent template.

Most of you were not up to the challenge. But some of the entries actually made sense, and some were nearly amusing. (These are not always the same entries.)

In fact, the winner of this contest barely made sense at all, although it made more than most. And that winner is:

FTC 68: Sperm + Egg = Killers by biped 7-24-05

I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but then I'd have to assassinate President Kennedy...again. I assassinated Martin Luther King...TWICE! BECAUSE he explained the chemical reactions of hydrobarbons to lunchmeat to me...TWICE! I ASSASSINATED ABRAHAM LINCOLN A HUNDRED TIMES BECAUSE HE WOULDN'T TICKLE MY SCROTUM A HUN -- hey, where are you going? I'm off to assassinate a WHOLE BUNCH of REALLY IMPORTANT world leaders! Later, ASSHOLE! SHE SHOT MY DAD! MINE, TOO! THEY WERE JUST TOO IMPORTANT TO LIVE!

Here's hoping biped can (and will) come up with a better template.

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"Old" is the old new.

i liked the template. i would have done more but i didn't think i could come up with anything better/worse than the pun in my first one

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what if nigger meant kite

Personally i liked biped's "The Bad Spur-Of-The-Moment Idea"

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I dumb :D

Thanks, I thought my entries were too stupid to win, but I now see that stupidity is good. I will strive to be even stupider in the future.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.