FTC 89 template by HCRoyall 8-08-06

Keep the bunnyman as the main character.

You may change the background in the second or third panels, or both.

You may not organize a search party for anyone who disappears under suspicious circumstances.

This contest will self-destruct in ten entries.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

BunnyBurger express by crabby 8-08-06

Welcome to Bunny Burger, may I take your order? What section are your pants in.

FTC 89: Special Promotions by PrimoOoze1138 8-08-06

Did I mention that every meal comes with a free baby seal? I'll take it!

And it's even comic 361 6-6-6. Isn't that spoooooooky?!

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Thar's a snake in mah boot!

FTC 89 by boloboffin 8-08-06

Welcome to McRapey's, can I take your order? Do you still have the same prize in the McRapey Statuey Meal as last week? Hey, boss, we still got the same prize in the Statuey Meals as last week? RARRRR!!!! PRIZE SAME EVERY WEEK, GIANT RED ROBOT SCHLONG UP ASS!!! YOU NEED RETRAIN??? Yeah, kid. Same prize. Great! Can I get one Statuey Meal delivered to my sister's room? The bitch stole my bicycle.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

When You Hope Upon A Booger by LuckyGuess 8-09-06

I hope they don't find the booger I put in the soda machine. Who put this booger in the soda machine? Wasn't me. Must have been Sam. Sam! You're fired! I hope they don't find the peices of Sam I put in the soda machine. Why are all of our drinks red?

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

The Angry Hare Food Emporium by Cre8tive13 8-09-06

Yes? I'd like a tuna on rye, please. Hold on a moment? Sure? THAT'S for NOT using the designated handicap parking spot we have out front! ...I...don't ....*gasp* drive....

FTC 89: The Unhappy Customer by biped 8-09-06

Welcome to Hitler's Ass Burger! How may I help you? Yes, I'd like to know a bit more about what you chaps "claim" to be a "Hitler's Ass Burger." Okay--it's like as if Hitler ate all the ingredients--lettuce, tomato, onions, cheese--and 1/4 lb. of lean, grade A beef--and shit a cheeseburger. But you see, that's just the thing--Hitler's dead. So, who, may I venture to inquire, is shitting these cheeseburgers? Uh...me. But I'm a direct descendant of Hitler, on, er...on his dad's side. I'm, uh...Biff Hitler. Yeah, that's it...Biff Hitler. Well then, these jolly well aren't proper Hitler's Ass Burgers a'tall, are they, you deceitful scoundrel?

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

The Bunny is pretending to be a ganster rapper by crabby 8-11-06

Yo, I'm a bunny in a fast food store. I used to work at a baseball card shop in my youth. Now I slang burger's an them robber's like to shoot. But it's all good, I make the good money, Really old woman......call me honey. Gansta Grillz mixtape VOL. #4 Who wants a mustache ride.

FTC 89: Fudd for Thought by Zaster 8-12-06

Welcome to Chuck R. Cheesesteaks. Can I take your order? I'll have the wabbit stew. Hahahahaha! There's no rabbit stew on the menu. Are you sure about that? Twy looking down the bawwel of this wifle! It's not rabbit season, jackass. It's clown season! Enough of your tweachewous twicks!

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

My Life As A Bunny by boloboffin 8-12-06

Ah, Jesus. I'm 41 years old, and the only job I can find is wearing a damn bunny costume while taking burger orders. I have no health insurance, I live with my ass-aching mom, and my only entertainment is Internet porn. Could my life get any worse? Ummm, somebody seems to have missed the toilet in the ladies' room.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

I'm tossing another one into the ring.

FTC 89: Another Christmas Story by PrimoOoze1138 8-14-06

20 years later *sigh*...Can I take your order, dad? You look like a pink nightmare. What'll it be mom? Oh, isn't that sweet... Shut up, Randy... hehehehehehe...

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Thar's a snake in mah boot!

Communication by crabby 8-14-06

I'm really worried about things between my girlfriend and I. It just seems like we can't even communicate anymore. Could I get a #2 with a coke. $4.29 ok. I love you too.

FTC89: Energizer Bunny by mandingo 8-14-06

hi, i'm from Where Are They Now and we'd like to tell your story! you know - the glory years as a child drummer, your parents stealing all your money, puberty killing your fledgling acting career, your long addiction to sniffing cocaine and other rabbits' asses you ready for a bomb? you saved my life that day. can we turn off the cameras, please?

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what if nigger meant kite

crabby gets last place because he made the last contest. Then I bumped him up to second place because of this comic:

BunnyBurger express by crabby 8-08-06

Welcome to Bunny Burger, may I take your order? What section are your pants in.

So then I decided that LuckyGuess should be in last place because he's a little shit. But then I bumped him up to second place because of this comic:

When You Hope Upon A Booger by LuckyGuess 8-09-06

I hope they don't find the booger I put in the soda machine. Who put this booger in the soda machine? Wasn't me. Must have been Sam. Sam! You're fired! I hope they don't find the peices of Sam I put in the soda machine. Why are all of our drinks red?

So that left boloboffin in last place, but I decided he didn't really deserve to be there and bumped him up to second place because of this comic:

FTC 89 by boloboffin 8-08-06

Welcome to McRapey's, can I take your order? Do you still have the same prize in the McRapey Statuey Meal as last week? Hey, boss, we still got the same prize in the Statuey Meals as last week? RARRRR!!!! PRIZE SAME EVERY WEEK, GIANT RED ROBOT SCHLONG UP ASS!!! YOU NEED RETRAIN??? Yeah, kid. Same prize. Great! Can I get one Statuey Meal delivered to my sister's room? The bitch stole my bicycle.

But mandingo put out so he wins. And because his comic was funny. Here it is again just so you know:

FTC89: Energizer Bunny by mandingo 8-14-06

hi, i'm from Where Are They Now and we'd like to tell your story! you know - the glory years as a child drummer, your parents stealing all your money, puberty killing your fledgling acting career, your long addiction to sniffing cocaine and other rabbits' asses you ready for a bomb? you saved my life that day. can we turn off the cameras, please?

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

As soon as I read it, I knew he'd won. Congrats!

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

As soon as I read it, I knew he'd won.

i will do my best to uphold the integrity blah blah blah and not besmirch blah blah stays in vegas blah you can't hold me without physical evidence

and that's a promise from my family to yours

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what if nigger meant kite