So on 17th December, we good folks at Bencomic were making new comics about hilarious, semi-injokey IRC quotations, when we found this message in the SC message box:

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TO: Bencomic

FR: Sergeant Scott McGowan
Williamstown (MA) Police Department

RE: Pine Cobble School Massacre

DT: December 17, 2007


Dear Bencomic,

Good afternoon sir, my name is Scott McGowan and I am a Sergeant with the Williamstown Massachusetts Police Department.

Presently, I have been assigned to investigate an internet posting titled “Pine Cobble Massacre” dated May 28, 2006 where you, Bencomic, are the submitted author.

I am confident there is a reasonable explanation as to why you posted this material; however, I will be unable to confirm that until I actually speak with you.

I am leaving this message on Monday December 17, 2007 at approximately 3:10PM. I will be returning to my office on Friday December 21, 2007 at 7:00AM.

I would strongly suggest you contact the Williamstown Police Department immediately after receiving this message and leave me a voice mail with your contact information.

Failing to respond to this message will leave me no choice but to contact the Berkshire County District Attorney’s Office with assistance in obtaining a subpoena for Stripcreator to provide me with this information. I would hope I do not have to travel that path.

I thank you for your time and look forward in speaking with you to clarify this matter. My contact information is as follows.


Sergeant Scott McGowan
Williamstown Police Department

[contact details omitted]

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I've checked up on this guy, he seems to be for real (unless the message is someone pretending to be him). The comics in question were made 18 months ago by an Australian member who has since left us, so really this is a less than timely response. That aside, our one American updater is apparently a pussy who won't call their voice mail, and I (the writer of this post) live in Britain and I don't want to make an international call over this. I sent the guy an e-mail explaining the deal (basically "we were joking, we have no official connection to the school and do not intend to blow it up, none of us even live anywhere near massachussets, also the comics are old", but more official), but I'm pretty sure he wants a voice mail, presumably to check we're not terrorists.

So anyway, my question is, has this happened on SC before? Any suggestions beyond our current actions? I'd rather not have SC caught up in any silly cyber-legal matters over a ridiculous comic making fun of some guy who used to attend a school.

The comics in question:

THE PINE COBBLE SCH*OL MASSACRE - PART 1 by bencomic 5-28-06

Dr. Dos is playing the Columbine RPG (http://www.columbinegame.com/) what's NBK? natural born killers. they were obsessed with it. dylan has a flashback in the cafeteria later on and if you can tell me what the music is that would be keen dylan morrison haha yes, the pine cobble scho*l massacre ahahahhahaahh ahhaAHHHAHA

THE P*NE COBBLE SCHOOL MASSACRE - PART 2 by bencomic 5-28-06

if anyone at pi*e cobble school is reading this, please, please, i'm going to kill you <Nadir> i can imagine him and that guy he jerked off with busting into the school with guns, and yelling: DYLDREW INC., BITCHES! BRINGING YOU... YOUR DEATHS! REIN RAUS, FUCKERS! <MadTom> he gets distracted in the cafeteria, though. i mean, when will the snack machines EVER be effectively free again?

THE PINE COB*LE SCHOOL MASSACRE - PART 3 by bencomic 5-28-06

he's wearing a Tux shirt that says KILL BILL more like, "there's no place like HELL" with HELL written like DELL yes. <MadTom> he goes into the library and has a flashback about having his computer confiscated I ended up back in her class, crying in public for the first time since 8th grade, because that stung me so badly... EVERYONE WHO USES WINDOWS STAND UP

THE PINE *OBBLE SCHOOL MASSACRE - PART 4 by bencomic 5-28-06

do you believe in god? yes well you shouldn't! it's illogical :P BLAM <MadTom> and he keeps tripping over his trenchcoat Oops! :P Heh.

THE PINE COBBLE *CHOOL MASSACRE - PART 5 by bencomic 5-28-06

<Nadir> one day, a girl named dominique, a plain, unpopular girl, yet, still beautiful in my eye, walked up to me during lunch and nervous, iggling, an with her friends beside her, asked me: please don't kill me <Nadir> i thought about it for about five seconds, which is quite a long time for both of our first shots at a relationship, but it was still too short. at that time, i was caught making the biggest mistake of my life - i blew her brains out at point blank range. she dumped me, and rightly so. <Nadir> here are some kmfdm lyrics: KEIN MITLEID!!!!!!

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lol

How did he message you? Start an SC account named SergeantScottMcGowan6969? Are his comics funnier than yours? I bet his comics are funnier than yours.

That is not the point.

http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/sgtmcgowan this is the account he made, apparently

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lol

I've been threatened a bunch by people but I've never had an actual cop posting. I'm not sure why he wouldn't touch base with me as well, but his his IP checks out.

You could always leave him your phone number via email and leave it up to him to call you.

I really don't have any info to give him even if he does subpoena me. Your IP address / email maybe, but he probably has all that now that you've emailed him.

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www.bradsucks.net

Good idea, I'll do that.

In the meantime, I decided to "censor" the strips so the name of the school is no longer explicitly mentioned! There should be no problem now (or will there :o )

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lol

A lot of people are taking things on the internet very seriously. I could see this as a probable series of events that lead up to the email you recieved:

1. Student at Pine Cobble School (or whatever) googles "Pine Cobble School"

2. Your comics show up.

3. Student mistakes you for a currently registered student at Pine Cobble, and takes your comics as a threat.

4. Student reports your comics to the local authorities.

There's been a few things in the past few months that have caused state governments to decide on their own internet restrictions. In my area, a girl was harassed on myspace to the point that she committed suicide, causing the state government to consider if they should put internet harassment laws into effect.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

he's a wanker. you shouldn't have censored the comics over him. i wish people would have a little more backbone on these things

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what if nigger meant kite

mandingo

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

I can't help but thinking this is all just a case of "too soon?"

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

I agree with Brad:  send him your number and let him call you.  You're innocent (presumeably) and far away and he doesn't have a subpeona yet (not that he's ever likely to get one), so just be polite and do what he wants as long as it doesn't inconvenience you in any way.

But I also agree with mandingo:  I don't know what sensoring your comic will do except make you look like a weenie.

What you should have done is to edit the comics to make them funny.  Mandingo didn't say that but he should've, so I could continue to agree with him.

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"Old" is the old new.

Don't get too righteously indignant, it was "funny" censorship; the name of the school is still there and all, I just did it so nobody else will find it on the search engine and cry themselves to sleep. If I wanted to be a capitulating wuss I would have deleted them already!

One of us will probably make a comic about this whole thing later anyway...

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lol

I love you bencomic. I want your benchildren.

Now that that's out of the way, I say we make an MSpaint subpeona aqnd send it to officer whatshisface, from the loving users of stripcreator.

That's actually a terrible idea. Don't do that.

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

How about a habeus sanitus order?

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Speaking as the resident deals-with-lawyers-and-cops-all-day guy, he's full of shit and probably sent you the PM thinking he was going to scare a local 14 year-old. If you read what he says he wants to subpoena, it's the "reasonable explanation as to why you posted this material." That would mean he's attempting to subpoena the contents of your brain, as I don't believe there are any documents or data in Brad's possession that will speak to any author's state of mind in creating any comic on this site.

I'd love to see the sergeant's declaration supporting the subpoena, "uh, judge, I'd like to subpoena a resonable explanation."  If anybody could do that, we'd have no need for a civil or criminal court system. 

bencomicwhat's funny is that if i'd won either of the last two comic contests, i was gonna make the theme of my contest school shootings.so this could have all come down when i had a comic contest pumping out school shooting comics left and right which would have just been FANFUCKINGTASTIC

the reason i decided on that theme was because this comic of mine prompted these comics out of another user:

School shootings. by DUBBLEDITCH 10-20-07

It is literally never funny to joke abotu school shootings. Hey look at this strip. http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/mandingo/409298/ It's not funny to joke about school shootings. Downvote a strip joking about school shootings. Didd you yousee the stripcreator.com strip about the school shooting? Yeah I was shown it. It's not funny to joke about school shootings. Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris were victimized and brainwashed apparently. Didja see it? Yeah it's not funny to joke about schoool shootings. I wish I could use who.is to report stripcreator for allowing a strip about school shotting.

http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/mandingo/409298/http://ww by DUBBLEDITCH 10-20-07

mmm shh.

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what if nigger meant kite

Choad's right, he's just trying to scare you.

I'd be tempted to try and piss the guy off in the hopes he'll try and follow up on this. Even if he does subpoena SC all he'll find out is that a) you're well out of his jurisdiction, b) you've committed no crime, c) he's been hunting for the wrong guy in the wrong country and d) if it ever went to court the guy who made it will just apologise, say he thought it was funny at the time, and delete the offending material. That'll probably be many years and tens of thousands of dollars down the track.

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Dinosaurs had eggs bro, the chicken came way later.