Sorry man, I hope things work out for you. Every bad day I ever had now seems like... er... a good day.
I always get upset when I hear about people dying during the administration of anestisia, becuase it just doesn't make sense. It's always sad to lose anyone anyway though. The last person I knew that died was this guy that was a powerline worker who was coming to church a bit. He was a nice guy, origionaly lived in Canada and had his own family up there, but was working down here on a job. One day, while he was working on the lines, he got electricuted. Was suposed to be a normal day, but...
He was also going to come to our thanksgiving diner.
Needless to say, we were confused and upset about it all, but definatly not more so than his family. We called them several times and talked about what was going on.
Er... anyway, I guess im tryin to say, he wasn't my grandmother or anything, just another person, but people die. And the living suffer. It's getting over it thats living.
Hope you feel better soon!