All comics by tocaracaria

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by tocaracaria
2-13-03
White Trash Jake talks to her arch enemy, Mr. Stinkybutt.
Mm'mm, Mr. Stinkybutt, you look so delicious! I could just smoke you up!
Then why don't you? My butt is smokalicious!
But I gots the patch on! And it gives me a satisfying amount of you.
Com'on! One puff for old times sake!
Once again, White Trash Jake!!
I can't! I just can't! I love yet another! 'Es name; Billy-Bob!
Yeah, well does Billy-Bob have a hot butt like mine?

 

by tocaracaria
2-13-03
Jake the Genius is up next!
Alas! Tis my enemy, The Bug!
I must say, Jake, why must we hate each other? I have no offence against you!
Thou art correct! Hate is a moronic thing! We shall no longer fight!
Oh, goodie!
................*Blink*..........
Tis time to shower our new found friendship with froven Yogurt!
Jolly!

 

by tocaracaria
2-13-03
Now, it's Jake the Obvious!
ARG! Who be ye, and why are ye in me house?
Yo, ese! I'm Pablo, your new friend!
I be wantin' no friend of ye sort!
Hey, yo, man, don't be actin' like that, Jake. You are so crazy, man! We've been friends for like ever!
Oh, that Jake the Obvious!
ARG! I never be seein' ye in me life!
Ese, you didn't read the script, did ya?

 

by tocaracaria
2-13-03
And the one you've all been waiting for.... Mental Jake!
I'm gonna read a poem I wrote. Called "Why the spork?"
I look at your flesh, Wondering what it tastes like.
So I grab my spork, And I peel back your soft skin.
It reminds me of my mother, That is, before I ate her.
How....... crazy.....
Why did I use the spork? I must have hurt worse.
Why the spork, Why the spork?

 

by tocaracaria
2-13-03
Okay, now it's your turn! To vote just PM me. I'll take the first ten voters, and I WON'T tally up untill i have 10, so tell your friends to vote!
That is all, thank you.

 

by tocaracaria
2-14-03
Waiting in Line to get into heaven: Your eternal soul.
Being stuck on a desert/forested isle with a crazy pirate: Your courage.
Finding out your white sister's son is black: Priceless.

 

by tocaracaria
2-14-03
From the person that brought you Jake the Moron...
And from the people that brought you "Paxil and the COP's"... Brings you an epic motion feature....
Jake the Moron: The Movie.... The Stupidity Comes to the Silver Screen!
Hello!

 

by tocaracaria
2-14-03
Don't eat tuna... You may be getting more than you expect...

 

by tocaracaria
2-15-03
Sense like only two people voted and it's been two days, I'm just picking the Jake I like the best: Mental Jake!
Hello, my wife, I have brought flowers home for you.
Yuck! Mums?? I hate mums! You're so stupid!
It would be sooo easy... No one would notice...
Why can't you be normal, you freak!
Wow, this is.... crazy.
S-s-s-she c-c-called me a f-f-freak! I just wanna stab her so hard!
I think I'll go take a shower... With the door locked.

 

by tocaracaria
2-15-03
Mental Jake went crazy and started killing people!!
I killed them all.....
Owie...
It's Garrett to the rescue!
No one can stop me! No one!!!!!!
Oh, I beg to differ!
Yeah, you show him, Garrett!
You can't stop me, Garrett!!!
Yeah, yeah, but there's one thing you weren't counting on.... My peace and love!! Mental Jake, I love you man!!

 

by tocaracaria
2-15-03
Hey, it's Garrett!
.... .... ....
.... .... ....
.... .... ....
.... .... ....
.... .... ....
Okay, I'll bring back Jake the Moron! Man...

 

by tocaracaria
2-15-03
Garrett has decided to read some letters from viewers before bringing back Jake.
Okay, Okay, letter 1: "Dear Garrett, what ever happened to that cool computer? He was so kick . -Mike Roch."
Letter 2 reads: "Dear Garrett the Great, You are the coolest! I wish I were as cool as you! I love you! Love, Mia Hamm" Well, Ms. Hamm I think thats great, but I'm in love with Mia Hamm!
Yet another letter: "Dear Mr. Garrett, I think it would be quit humorous if Jake drank too much coffee and was like super hyper! -Stoned Guy from NC"
Next: "Yo Dude, Jake is the only comic I read on strip creator... except ones by kaufmen... and GodsBestFriend... Well, really I read all of them. GO UNC!! -Other dude"
"Garrett, I think it would be funny if Jake wins a trip... To the Moon!! -Internet Nerd AKA: GodsBestFriend"
There you have it folks, I shall use all of your responds to make a very funny Jake comic! Thank you!

 

by tocaracaria
2-15-03
JAKE'S BACK!!!!!!!
Well, here we are in good ol' UNC!
YEAH, MORON!
Hey, cool, I won a trip to the moon on this contest I entered!
JAKE ON THE MOON?? CRAZY!
Good ol' Jake!
WOW!!!! I DRANK TOO MUCH COFFEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOOK, IT'S MIA HAMM!

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
It'll answer all your questions; Where did Jack come from? Where does Jake live? Why is Jake so stupid?
Coming when I feel like doing it, a Paxil Inc Production, Nothing to seperate the big screen and the Moron....
Jake the Moron: The Movie......... ......... Coming to a stripcreator.com near you.

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
Space Station Talon II: Miles above Earth...
Oh, crap, something's wrong with the main system! Computer: Radiation on level 2, please seal off all units but this one!
Yes, ma'am.
Oh, no, live support failing! Computer: We need all avalible energy towards oxygen creation.
Unable to compute...
Meanwhile...
Time to go to the Moon! Sorry, computer, I gotta leave you here!
YEAH, YEAH, HUGS AND KISSES, "I'LL MISS YOU" BLAH BLAH BLAH, NOW GO!

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
Jake's going to the Moon now!
Well, I'm off to the Moon! Bye everyone!
ARG! There he goes blastin off!
Uh, should that rocket say TNT on it?
ARG! Shut ye trap, they be professionals, they know what to be doin!!
Whatever...

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
Jakes in space.
Hey, who are you and how'd you get in here??
I'm Jake the Moron! And I came through that door over there.
AHHH!!!!! Close the door!! You're letting out all the oxygen!!!!!
"Shut the door, shut the door" You sound just like my old man!
Do it or we could all die!
Yep, just like my old man...

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
Space Station Talon II: Miles above Earth
Crap!! We're going down!!! We're gonna hit the Moon!!!!!! WE"RE GONNA DIE!!!!!
Hey, the vending machine ate my dollar, do you think I could be reinbersed?
YOU MORON!!!!!! THAT'S NOT A VENDING MACHINE!!! THAT'S THE MAIN COMPUTER!!!!! YOU JUST KILLED US ALL!!!!!!
So.... I don't get my dollar back?
WE ARE GOING TO DIE, MORON!!!!!!!!!
......So I don't get my dollar back?

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
The Moon: The one going around Earth
Man, oh, man, how are we gonna get back to Earth??
Uh, we can call the police useing my Cell Phone, it reaches anywhere in America!
I'm really trying to keep myself from killing you...
Oh, yeah, I have to do that too, sometimes.
How will we get out of this mess???
I'll tell you how!!

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
The Moon
Who are they??
Hey! It's....
It's everyone from stripcreator.com!!!!!!!!!
Old man kaufman here!
Alex AKA: GodsBestFriend
And, I, Garrett AKA: TocaraCaria!!!!!
And they brought me, a pencil!!!

 

by tocaracaria
2-16-03
The Moon!
Don't worry, Jake, We'll take care of this....
OKAY!
YAY!!!!!!!

 

by tocaracaria
3-22-03
Jake the Moron is back?!
Hey, everyone! I'm back!
Yes, yes, you are, and so am I!
Wow, war with Iraq.... Hope you don't get drafted, Garrett.
I can't be drafted. I have a history of mental unstablability.
Good times, good times.
....That means you're crazy, right?
Yes, yes it does.

 

by tocaracaria
4-05-04
Hey, everyone! Looks like Garrett is back to his old games!
Whaaaaat's up, everyone!
Oh great! The idiot's back...
Yep, so I wonder what whacky adventures I'll have!
I'm thinking something with a microwave.
Ah, good times, good times.
Ooo! I think I'll go make some popcorn.
What'd I tell ya?

 

by tocaracaria
4-05-04
I have nothing to say.
Well, my microwave just exploded.
Big suprise.
Maybe I should go to the doctor. A piece of glass DID fly into my brain.
Your moronicness never fails to amaze me.
He's back, baby!
Hey, look at all the bright circles...
Uh, maybe I should call 911.

 

by tocaracaria
4-05-04
Jake goes to the Doctor... Kinda.
Hey, doc, I think I have some brain damage going on here.
Uh... I'm a chicken, dude.
Chickens don't talk!
Yeah, niether do zapolac notflor mea.
Did you just say zapolac notflor mea?
Did I just say what?

 

by tocaracaria
4-05-04
Jake just got back from the hospital.
So, I just got out of the hospital.
Yay for you.
They said that I had trumendous brain damage... PLUS the damage from the piece of glass.
Jake, may I ask you a question?
Will Jake answer Computer's question? Will we find out the real reason of Jake's stupidness? Find out next time on... Jake the Moron!
Sure, computer.
Why are you so damn stupid?

 

by tocaracaria
4-05-04
Just to recap...
Why are you so damn stupid?
Well it all started when I was a wee lad.
Here we go...
To be continued...
I'm a young Jake. Before I was a moron.
I am crappy, old model of computer.

 

by tocaracaria
4-05-04
Wait wait wait, when you were a kid you were a goat?
Are you not listening to my story? Sheesh, idiot. Anyway...
I'm incredibly smart, I am, I am.
And I am very slow, old computer.
I think I'll go to visit my father in jail.
I have thirteen shades of grey.

 

by tocaracaria
4-07-04
This is a flashback, just so you know. Jake is visiting his father in jail.
Oh, father! You are my hero. I know you didn't kill those men.
Yes, as I told the police, judge, and grand jury; those three hundred and fifty two people were dead when I got there!
O dear father, tell me now; where is my mother?
Oh, son, I can't tell you that. I'm not even supposed to be married!
Yeah, that whole catholic priest thing never really worked out for you.
I head dat. Not enough killing, if you ask me.

 

by tocaracaria
4-07-04
So Jake went looking for his mother. He traveled across desert lands...
MOOOOOOOOOOOMMY! OH, MOOOOOOOMMY! WHERE ARE YOU?!
He went across the moon...
Ya know what this place could use? Some air. Yeah, that'd be nice.
And, yes, even across hell.
This place could use some... Uh... Well, this place could use just about anything to be nicer.
EARTHLY! YOU SHALL SEE THE TRUE MEANING OF HELL!!!

 

by tocaracaria
4-07-04
After beating the devil in a game of Scrabble, Jake finally found his mother.
Hey, mom. How's it going?
Good, I guess. I've been working in this graveyard for about ten years now.
This job seems like it'd suck.
Nah, only when the zombies come alive and try to eat my flesh. Luckly I have anti-zombie spray.
Can we say "Jinxed"?
This is so much fun, mother! I can only hope that a shovel won't fall on my head and make me a complete idiot. But what are the chances of that happening.

 

by tocaracaria
4-07-04
As I said just a second ago: I just hope that a shovel doesn't fall on my head making be an idiot.
Yeah, that'd suck.
And there you have it!
WHAT THE F-
Fyooie! That was weird...

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