You're a sweet guy, and you're just what I'm looking for, but I just like you too much to want to date you. You're such a good friend to me.
Well fuck you, ya smelly cunt! I can't believe I ever wanted to be with you, what with all your hangups and insecureties.... Bitch! You make me fucking sick!
How could you be so mean to me? God, I... I...
You what? You hate me now? Good, now that you don't "like me too much" anymore, how about we go out Saturday?
Doc, I'm having some_real_problems lately... I find myself taunted by these two asian girls. Ever since the newbies showed up, they've been eating_away_my_soul.
No, they're not "real" asian girls... they're the little default characters on an online comic strip creator. They used to be my muse, but now...
Mr. Billings put up a fine show just now in the fifth an(u)al Donkey Rape-A-Rama. Up next is the returning champion, Wirthling!!! Any comments before_the_big_event??
Gabe scored a lot of points on the new "Artistic_Interpretation"_rule with his patented Funky-Felching action... but what he has in style, I'll double in cold, hard exectution!
The guy drove his truck into a pole at an SOS and cracked the radiator, and needs it towed to the dealership.
SOS? Hah ha hah ha...
Eh? What's so funny?
Oh, you must not have them where you are. Ha ha... SOS is a strip bar. Tell him to go back and order more lapdances and cheap beer until 8 tomorrow when the dealership opens. *Click*
Sir, the dealership is closed for the rest of the day. Out of curiosity was this pole you rammed outside or inside the building?
Look, I hope you know this is just business... You seemed a bit to warm and gentle on the set today. I'm *not* going to get involved with yet another co-star!
But don't you think we have such wonderful chemestry together?
Cthulhy-baby, we have to talk. That last rape secene with Miko just wasn't very convincing.
Huh?
It's like you've lost that horrendous delight in watching her suffer... That sadism is what the fanboys *want to see!* But to watch the last movie, you seem almost smitten.
I-I-I... I am NOT! She means nothing to me!!! You mortals are like ants at my feet! Why should I "care" about her?
Look at you... You're blushing. Don't make me warn you again... your job here is in serious jeaopardy if you don't shape up and start acting like the Sex-Beast we hired!
He thought that there was more to us than just a film relationship. You know, he really *is* good, though... but after the last time I dated a co-star...
Honey, the question isn't about what happened in the past. It's what feels right in the moment.
You're right... and you know, for a monster with no concept of humanity, he's really not a bad guy... Oh shit, breaktime's over. Time to get back into character!
ACTION!!!
Hahaha!!! Now that I have you suspended in a compromising position, prepare to feel the ultimate in pleasure! Mwhahahahaha!!!
Your internet connection isn't working? Okay ma'am, I'd like you to double click the "My Computer" icon on the deskto...
No! I'm Prodestant, and I will NOT worship an icon!
You don't have to worship the icon, just double click it....
You speak with the devil's tongue!!! I *knew* computers were evil!!!
...You're_right_ma'am, computers are the tool of the Devil... We corrupt the unwitting with our idolatry and free porn... I guess you're just too smart for us.