All comics by snapcase

 

buick by snapcase 12-11-03
I AM MALIFICENT. THE UNCHARTERED CREVICE THAT IS MY SNATCH WILL SWALLOW ANY MALE WITH ONE VICIOUS SWOOP. OMG YOU GO GIRL LOL	HELLO. MY ENORMOUS ASIAN LOVEBOX LONGS FOR YOUR LEAN PHYSIQUE. So that thing about Asians and their huge, almost vacuum-like vaginas is true?	I AM NOT DEPENDANT ON YOU, MOTHERFUCKER. PMS? I wouldn't dare dip my schlong into your DNA, anyway. Psychotic bitch.

 

fara by snapcase 12-12-03
Behold; the recipe for a social calamity. Hey, what are some of my personal faults? It's for a school assignment. Let's see; you listen to Skillet and Sarah said that you open your mouth too wide when you kiss.	Mark abruptly departs after the damage has been administered. OMFG R U SERIOUS?!?! Yeah, I'm going to go kathwack to this Jenna Haze spank. Tata.	Hilarity ensues. U THINK I OPEN MY MOUTH 2 WIDE?!?! Your secret pet name for me is Fara Faucet? WTF.

 

voodoo recruit by snapcase 12-12-03
Late night chit-chat, voodoo style. Isn't it nice to have a place where we artificially-enlightened beings can come together and label everyone else as reactionary? I'm really just here for the available drugs, but all the homosexual undertones are making me really uncomfortable.	VP recruitment drive. NO BLOOD 4 OIL ROTF Hi! Do you feel secluded? Are you in need of a place where you can share your interests in illicit substances, neon-body paint, and loud European electronic music?	Dude, what was that about? Oh, some club-trash walked up and tried to coax me into joining her cult or something. I heard "neon body paint" and then I stopped paying attention.

 

the semi-prude by snapcase 12-12-03
Since when is sex necessary? Just because I ask for massages from my employers doesn't mean I'm promiscuous! OMG STFU.	Oh look. It's my boss, Edgar! Listen, Ed, my shoulders are a bit sore from restocking aisle 7. Can I have a massage? Oh, a "massage." Yeah, sure. Just don't pull any of that "harassment" shit when I start feeling you up.	Hey, who are you? I'm supposed to be meeting Edgar in the back room. He said one of his employees was easy, and I could get some action if I waited here.

 

captain caucasian by snapcase 12-13-03
Ethnocentrism? What? No hablo inglés! I am Captain Caucasain, and I say speak English or get the fuck out!	The Captain meets the people. Yo man, why you be hatin' on my colored brothas? We be pimpin' hoes. It's all good. Fo' real. I am unable to decipher your ebonics, good sir. I'd love to stay and shoot the breeze, but I see an Arab approaching!	Homeland Security! I'm not sure what you mean. I've lived here for over 30 years. I was even an English major in college. Uh huh. Be sure to tell your Uncle Bin Laden that I don't approve of his murderous antics!

 

zabib by snapcase 12-13-03
The Captain lays down the law. No hablo inglés! I am Captain Caucasian, and I say speak English or get the fuck out!	The Captain meets the people. Yo, why you be hatin' on my brothas, dog? America is about cultural diversity, and pimping bitches! I am unable to decipher your ebonics, good sir. I'd love to sit around and shoot the breeze, but I sense an Arab approaching!	Homeland Security! I'm not sure what you mean, my friend. I've lived here for 30 years. I was even an English major in college. Uh huh. That's a great story, Zabib. You and your Uncle Bin Laden should of studied acting!

 

comic calamity by snapcase 12-13-03
OMG CHECK OUT THIS COMIC ROFL It's alright, I guess.	C'mon! It was funny. Admit it. Nevermind that. Do you realize we're mere pawns in a comic that's being used to make fun of other comics?	Huh? Man, what's with you? I'm going to talk to someone who isn't afraid to have a little fun. Geez! What is "cyberz"?

 

genetics by snapcase 12-13-03
Cue the acoustic guitar. I'll be frank; I need a break. We should see other people. WUT R U SERIOUS?? BUT WHY?!?!	Prepare for the lament. To be honest, you're just not proportional in the right areas. Your dick is small, kid. Most would agree. I've called in an expert to prove it to you. I'M NOT MAKING U HAPPY??	Genetics are a bitch. Yep, pretty fucking small! WTF.

 

santa by snapcase 12-14-03
Curious little asian. Hi Santa! How did you get in here? I thought your girth was too large to fit in our chimney! Our doors are protected by alarms. Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas, little girl.	Santa is bewildered. Well, your jolly bellows really aren't answering any of my invasive questions. Hey, kid. I'm Santa. I distribute gifts to children all over the world (except Belgium) on Christmas Eve. It's kind of a tradition. What else is there to know?	Santa spreads some holiday cheer. Well, what if someone's fireplace is boarded up? Hey, kid, I don't have to answer any of your questions. Do you Asians always have to ruin everything? Christ.

 

prince albert by snapcase 12-14-03
HI DO U THINK I SHOULD GET ANOTHER PIERCING?!?! Uh, maybe one in your nose? I think piercings are ugly, really.	OK I LIKE UR SUGGESTION LOL I'LL COME BY TOMORROW AND ASK U WHAT U THINK OF IT! ...	OK I'M BACK WUT U THINK?!?! Rofl. I think all you need now is a Prince Albert.

 

snow day by snapcase 12-15-03
Larry and his father shoot the breeze. OH HEY DADDIO! What time is dinner tonight? My stomach is already rumbling in anticipation for that taco salad! We'll begin to eat as soon as your neighbor-slammin' mother finishes preparing our meal, and after we say grace of course ROTF!	Father and son say goodnight. OMG! Look at all the snow outside! I hope school is canceled because I didn't finish my paper on Knute Rockne! The snow is a gift from the Lord, my son. He loves everyone, except the Jews and those wacko Hindus and their 26 deities! It's 11 PM! BED TYME 4 U.	The next morning... OMG HI 2 U. Considering they don't plow our dirt roads here in ALTOONA, do you think you could give me a ride to school on your carriage, Mr. Ishmael? Is that a Skillet sweatshirt? Rofl.

 

mindtrix by snapcase 12-19-03
Mindtrix sets his sights on greatness. What exactly are you doing again? I AM GOING TO BE THE HIGHEST LVL IN DA GAME LOLOL ALL I NEED TO DO IS SET UP THIS SCRIPT	Chicks love guys with EXP. So you spent literally hundreds of dollars on this and you still need to cheat? STFU I'M NOT ASHAMED BESIDES EVERYONE DOES IT ROTF	Back in D.C., Webby's apartment... OMG I'M IN JAIL WTF I HOPE MY BUDDIES POST A PETITION ON THE BOARDS LOLZ Thanks for the money, jackass!

 

jen by snapcase 12-21-03
Jen laments. I am so ugly. OMG NO UR NOT	Total confidence boost courtesy of Shadow. No. I am really ugly. Everyone says so, including my family. NO WAY UR BONE STRUCTURE IS FABULOUS	This has gotten old quick. I am ugly. Ok. Yeah, you're ugly. The lower your self-esteem, the better chance I have of scoring. Screw statutory rape legislation.

 

breakfast by snapcase 1-02-04
Screw Seinfeld! People want Freiser. I think I'm going to leave the guild under the premise of taking a break for a few days, but really just rejoin with an illegal account to find out what they really think of me! Your breakfast. Let's hear it.	Freiser infiltrates TP incognito. Surely they won't recognize me with this clever disguise! This is one of the first applications I've seen that's worth accepting! Welcome; just don't call me Prudence.	Orches makes his debut. Wow, you all must really hate that Freiser guy! He seemed nice when I talked to him. HELLO. CLENTIS AHOYZED.

 

English Boy by snapcase 11-24-04
Madeleine macks it. Hi English boy! I love the white shirt you've worn for the past three weeks! Oh, hi Maddy. Isn't my accent great?	English boy departs. He's sooo sly... Time for tea! Cheerio!	Technoface crashes the party. Uh, hi technoface. Where are your pants? OMG! Were you just talking to Maddy? Did she mention me? I'm totally taking her skiing!

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