Speaking of weird ass churches, I was working in Los Alamos right after the fire last summer so I decided to go for a ride around one of the finger plateaus where most of the damage occurred. So I'm driving around looking at the houses, when I see a church there with crutches all over the outside. They also have bombs broken in half shaped like crucifixes. It's name was something like Church of the Black Hole and they had little sayings posted like "Critical Mass every Sunday at 10am." I'm guessing the radiation levels in that town are higher than most think.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Oddly enough, I think that's where Writhling was born.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

True story: A decade or so ago in California, a bunch of college students decided to run an experiment, and started a church which was based around the worship of cabbages. Yes, you read correctly - cabbages. By the time they ended the experiment a year later, they had a congregation of something like six thousand members.

Kinda like Scientology, eh? They worship a vegetable, after all...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

I thought scientology worshipped ghosts from ancient planets who all inhabit our bodies and create our problems?
(yes, that is what scientolofy is about).

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

I'm starting to think people come back just to insult wirthling. Like that story about the city of Omelas. Where the city never has any crime, any unrest, suffering, or unhappiness. Except in the basement of one building where a child is locked up, treated terribly, and never allowed to see sunlight.

Where the hell was I going with this?

Oh yeah, wirthling is that child to us. Allowing us to go out into the world and create funny, but at his expense. No, wait that wasn't it. I think it was how wirthling should also be locked up in a basement and not be allowed to see sunlight.

That would be cool.

The Ones who Walk Away from Omelas

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

quote:

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I thought scientology worshipped ghosts from ancient planets who all inhabit our bodies and create our problems?
(yes, that is what scientolofy is about).

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HEH, hardly religious intolerance. It's more like cult intolerance.
What religion requires thousands and thousands of dollars to be a part of it... don't answer that.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

quote:

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What religion requires thousands and thousands of dollars to be a part of it... don't answer that.

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For 509.99, you get a tour of the G.O.D. trucking depot. Informative I guess, but somehow the miracle of Guaranteed Overnight Delivery wasn't all I'd hope it would be.

I still can't get the smell of grenadine and sour mix out of the damn thing.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

How much will five bucks get me?

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Ask father TOBOR.

Any other silly questions?

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

If we were keeping score, I think that quip would be worth about fifty points.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

This thread is having a moment of silence for those involved in today's events. Let's hope boorite, wirthling, evil_d, kaufman, and anyone else in the DC or NY area gets home safe and sound.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

I'm safe, and probably sound as I ever was. Therefore: Billy Joel sucks 'em!

I was glad to hear from LadyJ in the other thread, and from the rest of you. Maybe this isn't the thread for solemnity, but:

I agree with LJ and her mom's example. Let's not spread panic with all this talk about WW3. Whoever did this is diplomatically isolated. This is not a Balkans type of situation.

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What others say about boorite!

I agree. Let's focus on the topic at hand -- namely, that Gabe Billings is a colossal geek.

Speaking of which, I took a look back at the beginning of this thread, and did a little calculation, and I don't think we're on track for any of our initial predictions about when we'd reach comic #100,000. Right now it looks like our overall average is about 131.66 comics per day, which, if it continues, will put us at 100k sometime in February of 2003. I think. Math is not my strong point.

Since we don't have the comic lists anymore, I had to navigate by guessing numbers until I found where we are now and where we were at midnight. (We've just passed #32,800.) In the process, I found some interesting recent comics.

A funny one by ObiJo!
One with a senseless kaufman appearance solely for the sake of a "pussy" joke.
A bigoted one by someone I'm ashamed to share a nationality with.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

Yeah, that last one was lame lame lame.
I am going to laugh my ass off at all these assumptive assholes if it turns out that it was all americans who really did it.
Then I'll die as all the big nations in the world blow us up.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Little known fact: Alexander the Great stood 6'7".
By the standards of the day, he was a Colossal Greek.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Fact: The Derwent River that "flows" through Alice Springs in central Australia is a dry riverbed for most of the year. However, when the rainy season finally arrives, it becomes a Colossal Creek.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Today I asked the guy at Best Buy if they had Tron on DVD and he said he never heard of it. I started to weep in the store. I was politely asked to leave.

I AM A COLOSSAL GEEK

This story is true except for the crying I didn't do that until I got home.

Tell 'em it's like The Matrix meets Shrek.

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What others say about boorite!

Nah, it's more ReBoot meets Gladiator...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

I've just finished the virtual tour of wirthling's soon to be house. And now I'm all ready to rob it as soon as they get it built.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

quote:

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I've just finished the virtual tour of wirthling's soon to be house. And now I'm all ready to rob it as soon as they get it built.

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A nice taupe would be just super!

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.