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Stripcreator » Comic Competitions » CC 259: It's...

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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:

Your comic ends before you get to deliver the punchline. Therefore, your job, should you choose to accept it, is to make the funniest damn setup you can. Remember, no punchlines allowed. (You automatically get 3 points for difficulty.)

This thread will self-destruct in 6 days (Thursday the 30th of Septober, probably in the mornin' time).

---
I has a flavor!

9-24-04 7:39am (new)
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dcomposed
C3H5N3O9

Member Rated:

Untitled by dcomposed
9-24-04

---
Batman created by Bob Kane

9-24-04 7:42am (new)
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biped
Mr. Wonderful

Member Rated:

CC 259: C L I F F H A N G E R by biped
9-24-04
FUCK! A guy can't even slip into the shower to jack off without Dad barging in!
Whoa...I can't believe I ate twelve chili-cheese burritos last night. This will definitely be the biggest, smelliest shit EVER.
I think the bathroom's empty, Father. You can just go right on in.
Thank you, my child.

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

9-24-04 10:12am (new)
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Zegota
Stripcreator Regular

Member Rated:

CC 259: What a joke that would be by Zegota
9-24-04
Ladies and gentlemen! All votes have been counted and the result is final.
It is with pride that I announce to you the man who will lead this country in the next four years!
Mr. George W. Bush

---
And you know what Hell is, folks. It's Andy Gibb, singing 'Shadowdancing' for aeons and aeons...

9-24-04 11:12am (new)
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biped
Mr. Wonderful

Member Rated:

CC 259: The Set-Up by biped
9-24-04
Pardon me -- does this bar serve ducks, dogs, parrots, nuns, and/or priests?

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

9-24-04 1:01pm (new)
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possums
FERN DESTROYER

Member Rated:

IT'S SO BAD by possums
9-24-04
Man, I hate the High Holidays.
Why?
You don't get to eat anything on one day, for instance...
Well, your pet walrus sure likes it.
That's no pet walrus, that's my...

9-24-04 4:55pm (new)
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choadwarrior
Crash Magnet

Member Rated:

Bar Jokes That Never Happened (1) by choadwarrior
3-18-04
Is this a bar?
No, it's a fast food restaurant, why?
A rabbi and a nun are waiting for me outside. We need to walk into a bar to setup a joke for someone.

Bar Jokes That Never Happened (2) by choadwarrior
3-18-04
What can I get you?
Before you serve me, I need to ask you one thing.
Shoot.
If a man came into this bar carrying an aligator, would you kick him out?
Of course.
I'll have a beer.

Bar Jokes That Never Happened (3) by choadwarrior
3-18-04
Sorry sir, you can't come into this bar.
Porque no?
We only let Mexicans in if they are with a black guy and either a white guy or gay guy.
What if I'm gay?
Black guy and white guy--No double-dipping.

Bar Jokes That Never Happened (4) by choadwarrior
3-18-04
Why did we walk into this bar?
To get drunk you cunt.

9-24-04 6:21pm (new)
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Rabid_Weasle
Professional style cramper

Member Rated:

CC259: untitled by Rabid_Weasle
9-24-04

---
Poop.

9-24-04 7:06pm (new)
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Rabid_Weasle
Professional style cramper

Member Rated:

CC 259: How Big by Rabid_Weasle
9-24-04
Hey Dan.
Hey Brad.
How big is your penis?
It's...

---
Poop.

9-24-04 7:08pm (new)
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Kr0n1c
Product of The California School System

Member Rated:

CC 259: Fuck by Kr0n1c
9-25-04
shit, fuck, cunt, dubly doo, dubly doo
piss, bitch, mother fucker, fuckety fuck, fuckety fuck
And they lived happily ever after... The End...or is it?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????fuck
fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck ,fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck ,fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

---
Get Your War On

9-25-04 1:47am (new)
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KungChiFu
L337 57ripX0r

Member Rated:

CC 259: It's...oh, I got nothin' by KungChiFu
9-25-04
Back off man. Get that thing away from me.
You don't like the undersea scene?
If YOU made your living on the oceans, would YOU like being drawn underwater?
I see your point. What would you rather see then?
Let me think a second...
How about a nice...um...

I regret that, after my long abscence, this is the best I could come up with. Hi, everybody.

---
Your mickey mouse kung fu is no match for my superior fighting style.

9-25-04 8:29am (new)
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Bazilla
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

CC 259: The punchline is... LOVE! by Bazilla
9-25-04
So, this guy walk's into a bar.
And he's wearing this black jacket, and has a parrot on his left shoulder.
The barman asks "Can I put my cock in your mouth?" to which the man replies...

---
I am not 16 going on not 17, I know that I'm naive.

9-25-04 12:14pm (new)
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seattlesque
Junior Comic Technician

Member Rated:

CC259: Terrorists Stop At Nothing by seattlesque
9-24-04
Which joke are you working on now?
The one about Osama Bin Laden, the goat, and four stolen surface-to-air missiles.
How much longer until you have a punchline?
So long as nothing distracting happens, I'll have it in one more frame. Otherwise it might take two.

CC259: Let Jargons be Jargons by seattlesque
9-24-04
Jesus Christ, I hate my mechanic! I know nothing about cars, and I end up having to take his word for everything!
I feel your pain.
Earlier that day...
How can you possibly justify these astronomical fees?

9-25-04 2:54pm (new)
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Zaster
Wait for it...

Member Rated:

I Laugh to Keep from Crying by Zaster
9-25-04
This is funny! What do you get when you cross a blonde chick with an octopus?
God, I'm lonely...

---
I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

9-25-04 7:00pm (new)
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fzh
Stripcreator Regular

Member Rated:

CC 259: Poetry Reading by fzh
9-25-04
Life? Or a dream? How do we know?
*snap, snap, snap*
Hello? Is this thing on? Ok....
There once was a man from nantucket...

9-25-04 7:42pm (new)
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DragonXero
I'm Here, You're Queer, Get Used to it

Member Rated:

CC259 by DragonXero
9-27-04
I'm so tired of this existence.
So why don't you kill yourself?
I can't kill myself! I don't have the implements to do so!
Well you could just use that hammer and nail.
What hammer an n- oh!
Do it, pussy.

---
Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

9-27-04 2:31am (new)
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jes_lawson
I don't know what I'm doing either

Member Rated:

From the archives:
CC 199: RARRGH! TOBOR WILL... by jes_lawson
7-24-03
What a great day today! I finished work early and I'm so looking forward to getting laid tonight!
Say! That looks like a twenty dollar bill on the ground! I'll just bend over and pick it up!
Wow! It's a fifty! Can this day get any better?

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

9-27-04 3:06am (new)
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KamikazeBob
Junior Comic Technician

Member Rated:

CC 259 by KamikazeBob
9-27-04
I've got to tell you something. I was walking through the city and found a homeless person.
Freaking hobos...
Uh, yeah. Well long story short, I've got AIDs.
Wait... what?!
Yeah... I guess I've got a few days to live.
I've got something to admit too. Well, long story short I was going through your underwear when this crab came out of no where and I got...
" />

---
Win video games along with systems and accessories just by signing up! http://readysetgamer.com/register.asp?6144=92071

9-27-04 7:08pm (new)
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umfumdisi
Forum comment:

Member Rated:

Too bad biped isn't judging.

CC 259: I don't know why golf clubs are "bullshit." by umfumdisi
9-27-04
FORE!!!
Looks more like "Fore-ever."
I hate this game. I don't even know why we play. And these golf clubs are fucking bullshit!
What makes you say that?

---
Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

9-27-04 8:21pm (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

CC 259: The Twilight Ozone by kaufman
9-28-04
I think that after all these weeks, the traffic's starting to let up.
Let me check the atlas ... Hey, we've almost crossed out of Los Angeles.
I think you're right. Look, the smog's starting to dissipate.
You know what that means, don't you?
No, what's it mean?
We're about to finally see what each other looks like!

CC 259: A Drop in the Beckett by kaufman
9-28-04
Is that him?
I think so. HEY, GODOT! OVER HERE!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

9-28-04 7:11am (new)
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biped
Mr. Wonderful

Member Rated:

You may have heard the first one before.

CC 259: It's On The Table, And Mommy And Daddy Are Upstairs by biped
9-28-04
Mommy, what's a "son-of-a-bitch"? And what's "shit"?
Umm...a "son-of-a-bitch" is... a... a preacher. And "shit" is... uhh... food.
Oh. And what's "fucking"?
"Fucking" is... umm... getting dressed. Which reminds me, your father and I have to get dressed now... we're having Reverend Smith over for dinner.
Good evening, Sally. Is dinner ready? Where are your parents?
Come on in, you --

CC 259: Billy Pulls A Boner by biped
9-28-04
Oh, boy! I've finally got the whole house to myself! Now it's just me, Jenna Jameson, and "Mr. Weenie"!
Are you sure Billy won't mind showing my Girl Scout troop how to pull taffy?
Oh no, he loves to pull the old taffy! In fact, he's probably pulling, jerking, and manipulating some right now!
OH YEAH!!! WHIP IT -- WHIP IT GOOD!!! UNNGGGHHH!!! BEST JERK EVER!!!
See? He's having a ball in there! Go on in and watch him pull it, girls -- quick, before he finishes!

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

9-28-04 8:51am (new)
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Zaster
Wait for it...

Member Rated:

Comics That End In Shame by Zaster
9-28-04
Hey Marvin, what do you get when you cross a teacher with an ostrich?
What a fuckin' stupid question!
They're not even in the same genus or family, even. The chromosomes would never line up during mitosis!
You wouldn't get ANYTHING! Are you seriously that retarded!?

---
I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

9-28-04 2:44pm (new)
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umfumdisi
Forum comment:

Member Rated:

CC 259: If Mickey D's Was MikeyG's by umfumdisi
9-28-04
Would you like fleas with that?

---
Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

9-28-04 9:30pm (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:

Ding ding ding. Time's up, bitches. And from a cursory glance, you aren't exactly making it easy for me to pick a winner. Hang on about 15-20 minutes whilst I mastur-- I mean, decide the victor.

---
I has a flavor!

9-30-04 8:01am (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:

Okay, I called in an accountant, crunched the numbers and here is the final tally:

First off, I'd like to thank everyone for making the judging so damn hard on me. And I'd like to thank myself for just saying "hard on."

The honorable (ninja) mentions:

kaufman, as usual, produced stellar contributions.

seattlesque's two entries show great promise and understanding of The Force.

choadwarrior's bar joke series was phenomenal.

biped's sheer overload of teh funnie had me waving a white flag.

But in the end, I had to give the victory to:
I Laugh to Keep from Crying by Zaster
9-25-04
This is funny! What do you get when you cross a blonde chick with an octopus?
God, I'm lonely...

which is even better if you read it using the voice of Quagmire.

Zaster, 'tis all yours.

---
I has a flavor!

9-30-04 8:13am (new)
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