What are there policies on:

Millitary

Foriegn Realtions

Energy

College and Finance

Jobs and Economy

and

Health care?

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possible savior probable SEX MACHINE

Millitary
Guns+Animals+Boats=Navy

Foriegn Realtions
Offer friendship afghans to all nations. Become buddies with Italy.

Energy
Lots of it.

College and Finance
College for some minaiture american flags for others.

Jobs and Economy
Pro

Health care
Everything including genital warts are taken care of by secret militias which enter your home and cure you.

Millitary - Napalm Kanadia. They're so nice up there that they won't mind.

Foreign Realtions - Make nice with everyone else, unless they're not nice. Then scowl at them in disapproval.

Energy - Inform the students of MIT that the first person to invent and perfect cold fision gets hot, unbridled sex with Angelina Jolie. I give it two weeks for energy is no longer a problem.

College and Finance - Going to school seems to help out if you want to make money. Perhaps we should study this connection.

Jobs and Economy - When people work jobs, it helps the economy. Perhaps we should study this connection. Perhaps we should tax companies who send all their labor overseas, and give tax-breaks to companies with 100% American labor (can you say tax-breaks for small businesses?) It would be like tariffs for labor. Then, we make Puerto Rico an actual state. Instead of paying people 50 cents an hour, they make minimum wage, and we have a new workforce for the manufacturing jobs currently located in Central American and South-East Asia. But these would now be American citizens who pay taxes, and we then build McDonalds and Starbucks in Puerto Rico so they can spend the money on American products.

and

Health care - People should care about health. We should stop pulling fruit and vegetables off the vine before it ripens. Our food is full of pesticides, growth hormones and preservatives, but no actual nutrion. If we have some of anti-oxidants that occur natually in food if grown properly, we wouldn't be getting sick.

And the government should regulate insurance and health care, whether they supply it or not, it needs to be more regulated. Insurance companies screw hospitals and patients alike.

We also need to stop allowing drug companies to advertise on TV. We get people walking into doctors demanding drugs. They are not doctors. They don't know what they need. Doctors need to tell you what drugs you need, or don't need.

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"Nihilism makes me smile."

Millitary-
Attack New Zealand.

Foriegn Realtions-
Attack New Zealand.

Energy-
Go to bed eariler and have a good breakfast and they'll have plenty of energy to do whatever they want. (i typo'd want as wang rofl)

College and Finance-
Only let in black people and Mexicans who want to pay a million million cents.

Jobs and Economy-
Build more KFC.

and-
Use it however much they want, I don't care. It's just a word.

Health care?-
Health care is for pussies.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

Millitary
Hugs are better than guns!

Foriegn Realtions
No fatties.

Energy
120 Cal

College and Finance
At least a gold star in sand box, and they should be able to pay for their own rent.

Jobs and Economy
The entire population is a giant hierarchy of people working for whoever is the next older than them. Except for the oldest person alive, they get to retire.

and

Health care?
You're required a daily dosage of 12 aspirin a day, and if that doesn't work, y'all dead.

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Poop.

[Click to view comic: 'Amy Has A Thought']

Viva la Santa!

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Poop.

Viva la Santan! Huh? Oh my bad.

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Get Your War On

Millitary
Guns. Lots of guns.

Foriegn Realtions
We're all part of one simulation that's draining us! There are no foreigners!

Energy
We are the energy.

College and Finance
Programs available for everyone that teach you anything you want to know are available in the loading program.

Jobs and Economy
Since our only real tradable good is single-celled protiens, I guess everyone's pretty much equal already.

Health care?
Just keep clear of agents, you should stay pretty healthy that way. All the viruses were destroyed along with most other life anyway.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

quote:

---

What are there policies on:

Millitary

---

The perfect person to be in charge of a country is someone who doesn't want power at all.

Now, when do you think someone like that will run for office?

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

Military: Let's take over someplace rich. We didn't spend all this money on weapons for nothing.

Foreign Relations: Don't preach at us, foreigners, because you'd do the same damn thing, if you had all these weapons.

Energy: Maybe this should fit somehow into our military takeover plan. Yes, that's it. Use the military to take over someplace with lots of energy.

College: My kid gets a degree on the public's nickel, end of story.

Finance: Something to do with Greenspan and interest rates. Fucked if I know. At least help people buy their own houses.

Jobs: I have very mixed feelings about jobs. I hate going to my job, and yet I would be very sad without one. Ask again later.

Economy: This again? What the hell?

Health care: Everyone gets to see a General Practitioner at a moment's notice for a small co-pay-- say $15. Uncle Sam pays the difference. Throw in a raft of public "Wellness" programs. It'll be a shitload cheaper than than having all these poor fuckers crowding up our emergency rooms. And make the fucking drug companies STOP SCREWING US. That would be a good start.

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What others say about boorite!

quote:

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The perfect person to be in charge of a country is someone who doesn't want power at all.

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Millitary: The Decepticons are dangerous and must be stopped forcefully, but compassionately.

Foriegn Realtions: Other nations with giant transforming robots should be approached as potential allies in the battle to stop Megatron.

Energy: We'll have all the energy we need once we've secured the energon cube supply against Megatron and Starscream.

College and Finance: The world we'll see great advances in robotics and engineering sciences once the autobots are victorious. Grants should be available to help talented people tackle these disciplinces.

My ideal candidate is Optimus Prime.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

Millitary:
Giant death mecha. And I want a Stargate program.

Foriegn Relations:
Annex Tunisia.

Energy:
Thousands of squirrels running in cages.

College:
Free education for everyone with no difference in quality between classes.

Finance:
Basic housing, utilities, and child care should be paid for everyone. Above that can be paid by the person.

Jobs and Economy:
Create a bunch of jobs like the CCC, but cooler, like giant death mecha builders and spaceship crew.

Health care:
Free health care for everyone with no difference in care between classes.

quote:

---

The perfect person to be in charge of a country is someone who doesn't want power at all.

Now, when do you think someone like that will run for office?

---

What are there policies on: - First they'd have to know the difference between "there" and "their."

Millitary - They'd also have to know how to spell "military," but anything Nerf would be good.

Foriegn Realtions - Three, no, four in a row! Are you sure you're not Shrub? Anyway, "foriegn realtions (sic)" would be handled by doing the opposite of the Americans.

Energy - Gatorade and powerbars for everyone!

College and Finance - Free post-secondary education for anyone who knows how to spell "foreign relations."

Jobs and Economy - The economy would suffer for a while after severing trade relations with the United States, but in the long run it would be worth it.

Health care - More money into our universal health care system. Conservatives like to argue that we can't solve our waiting periods with more money, but of course we can. More equipment and more doctors mean shorter lines. More focus on prevention would be good though.

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Please remember to spay and neuter your elected representatives.

Millitary

We should blow up the moon. Just...for no reason at all. Just because it would be really cool. What better use for our military spending is there?

Foriegn Realtions

If we blew up the moon, all the countries would be impressed with our strength and would want to be our pals.

Energy

Blowing up the moon would be a huge waste of energy, but admit it: IT WOULD BE SICK ASS.

College and Finance

We'd pull funds from America's colleges to finance our moon-exploding project.

Jobs and Economy

What with all the cash other countries will give us as a reward for blowing up the moon, our economy will boom. Jobs...eh. Just lower outsourcing and we'll be fine. Oh, and blow up the moon.

Health care

What's not to like about health care? You've got health, and you've got care. I'm all for health care.

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It's grime time.

Too bad it's too late to blow Keith Moon.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

http://www.av1611.org/othpubls/santa.html

I think that article should provide some necessary reading on the SANTA FOR PRESIDENT topic.

Also, expect my band/cult, LOVE SANTA's first album to be out soon after election day.

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It's grime time.

Can't decide...?

http://www.selectsmart.com/president/

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

That's brilliant. Let someone who is completely biased decide for you. That's democracy in action. I just read over their website. They've got some CHOICE things to say about Bush.

This is one of the most biased websites I've seen lately.

http://selectsmart.com/president/Bush.html

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"Nihilism makes me smile."