All comics by what_the_krevice

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...
...
...
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All your ba -
Do you REALLY want to finish that sentance?

 

*POORLY TRANSLATED*
Jasper, touching you were mine night last?
Baaaa?
Denial giving to me not correct you take! Repent in the present!
Baaah-aaahhh.
*EXPLOSION!*
Damned indigenous peoples. Spoil MY fun, will you?

 

Hiya J-Man!
My son, please do not pillage and conquer this poor land
But I was going to do it in your name and convert them to your word!
You can do that?
You can do anything with propaganda; and I've got the best piece of all time: The Bible!
I feel dirty...

 

You have no chance to survive; make your time.
We bes but simple farmin' folk, m'lord. We ain't meanin' no harm by -
*stomp stomp stomp*
Move zig, biatch.

 

Hi folks, this is Craven Morehead and Connie Lingus with your 6 O'Clock News
Our top story: The invasion of the small, poor, defenseless country of MadeUpistan
Reports out of the worthless, backwards nation are skepitcal at this point, some indicating a lone blue blob as the invasion force
The Bush Administration would like to do something, but they're currently being lynched and hanged outside the White House
In other news: nobody knows what the hell the point of this comic really is
Have the creators finally thrown up their hands and said "I just don't know"? Details at 11.

 

Out of my way, protestor!
Brother, it's all like, about peace and love man. You gotta let go of your hate and just be, like, free, dude.
What the fuck are you babbling about, you filthy hippie?
Peace, brother. Peace.
Foo'! I'm an educated thug with money on my mind! Now get outta my way fo' I bust out my nine!
My bullshit rhetoric simply can't compete with your mad rhyming skillz.

 

Outta my way, local authority figure! I've got my eyes on the prize!
Is that your unathorized military vehicle parked halfway in that handicapped spot?
The big green one?
Do you see any other unathorized vehicles parked in handicapped zones?
*STAB!*
The perferred nomenclature is "differently-abled" you insensitive shit licker!

 

A small drop of water continued his hostile take-over of MadeUpistan today
I knew it! I've been saying it all along! He's an evil bastasrd who loves no one!
In recent conquered city of "FakeCityVille", he erected a statue of one named "Pervis"...
He...wha...oh my god...that's so thoughtful...I guess I had him figured wrong...
...which he then covered in horse shit before running it over with a tank
OH GOD! DID HE REALLY NEED TO JERK OFF ONTO THE SMOLDERING RUINS!!? *sob*

 

Huzzah, you've nearly single-handedly brought the entirity of MadeUpistan to its collective knees. Do you have any plans of forming an army to defend your newly claimed territory?
Well, Mr. Rather, it's funny you should ask; you see, I'm training a squad of crack commandos as we speak.
Whatcha got there, ol' Alex?
*bang*
How do you respond to allegations that your "training" consists solely of giving the indiginious kangaroos fully automatic weapons?
At least I don't cheat on my taxes!

 

Hi Folks. Pervis here. I complained to Huzzah that I hadn't been a major part of the plot
He proceeded to drop me from an airplane on some unsuspecting civilian dissidents
...At least he didn't lie to you about winning a sky diving trip...
Pshh, at least he didn't convince you that he fathered you with a wood duck...

 

So what's wrong now?
Stripcreator is full of fascists - they're censoring our work now. Bleeping out the fucking cuss words!
Oh, yeah, I see the little asterisks instead of the word
So Mike is officially quitting this lame ass site. Fuck everybody who runs this place
Fuck them and everybody who looks like them?
Precisely

 

Note to All
If you notice the last strip, you'll notice some anger
It was then realized, our swear words were only censored to those who didn't log into the site
Mike's complaint and boycott due to the censorship of his art still stands
He just wanted to swing by and tell you all
Y'know - to avoid confusion

 

*On the MBH at GameFAQs.Com*
HOLY SHIT, DUDE! SOMEONE JUST FLAMED ME IN A TOPIC!
Uh...huh...and?
So a moderator needs to go and delete it!
Did you try...marking it for moderation first?
...Well...erm...no
I outta hit you...

 

So I was banging this dude, right?
Naturally...
He turns to me and he says, "Shit, man. You coming yet?"
...uh-huh?
I'm like, "Gimme a break, I'm only eight!"
What kind of candy was it?

 

by what_the_krevice
10-05-04
So we've been in suspended animation for like a month or longer!
How so?
We haven't moved around or done nothin!
Reality check; we never actually "move around" anyways. We're placed in predetermined positions. I hardly call that "animation"
...And your point is?
Just beyond your reach, apparently

 

Well, what now?
We've done it all. Traveled through space & time. Saved the galaxy.
Don't forget the sex!
How could I forget the sex?
...will there be more sex?
The future is unclear.

 

Will Pervis and Huzzah engage in dirty man love?!
Will Mike, Kyle and Tommy stop engaging in dirty man love...
...and actually update this more than once every 4 months?
...God, we hate you
You know, you say that, but really you only hate yourselves...
...actually that's very true...

 

Did you just fuck up?
Damn Narration Gods!
All Errors Due to ErectusMagnimus
Big penises?
They long for them.

 

So how'd we end up in space?
I'm not going to tell you...
Wait, why not?
Just assume that this is all your fault, and you're good to go.
Everything can't be all my fault!
"Let's go inside the space shuttle, Huzzah! What could POSSIBLY happen!?"

 

So I led you onto the space shuttle and we, through no fault of your own, were stranded in deep space?
That's about the long and short of it, yes.
What about the deep--
I swear to all that is sugary and delicious, if you say "What about the deep and wide?" your ass is grass.
*KA-PLINGOW!
...
When have you ever known me to stay winthin my own parameters?

 

He thought he'd be cute and try to push this whole thing onto me
I'm not saying vengence makes me right; it makes me feel better.
Huzzah? Mommy?
Oh great... of all the moons, in all the galaxies, in all the universes, you had to be stranded on mine...

 

So what do you Moonbots do for fun around here?
Picnic in the Crater Park, kill human interlopers, braid each other's copper welding...
Picnic, huh? Gee, I never thought robots goofed off like that.
We prefer to think of it as...Prelude to Interloper Crucifixion with Nilla-wafers and Igloo Pies.
If only he knew...
Kind of a wordy acronym, isn't it?
I don't see YOU coming up with great ideas for the slaughter of your race!

 

Just keep walking...
So where are we going? Some kind of temple where you worship me as a God?
You're new to this whole "genocide" thing aren't you?
Will there be cake?
*FAINT* *THUD*
No, but plenty of anal bleedage
...mer...cy..

 

Hey Jeff, sup?
Oh, not much. Just testin' the new Sodomizer 5000 that Seamus built. Running out of test subjects though.
Well, uhh...I got a pretty good one here. Looks like his ass has been permeated by many a large, blunt object. Loose as hell.
Hmm...seems perfect. I'll give you 70 Claxwarbs for him.
*BUZZ* *SNAP* *CRUNCH* *WHIRR*
SOLD! ...I can't watch.
I CAN! WOO-HOO!!!!

 

Hey Huzzah, everything went great! Here's your half of the loot.
Thanks a lot, Calvin. Go ahead and load him on the ship if you're done with him.
Well...erm before I do that...do you mind if I ...erm...
Oh no, by all means. Just lemme know when you're finished.
*grunt* *groan* *whir* *moan* *gasp*
Oh yeah take it you incapacitated love muffin!

 

...nnggg...uhh, what?
'bout damn time!
What happened? I...had the strangest dream.
You hit your head and fell...right on the Sodomizer 5000.
5000?! I DIDN'T KNOW THEY MADE THEM THAT HIGH!
Bet you're real thrilled now. Eh, Sphincter Boy?

 

I'm willing to bet that you can't go the rest of the trip back to Earth without making a gay or butt sex joke
Pshh! No problem! But if I win I get your soul
Yeah...sure...whatever Huzzah. You get my soul if you can manage to pull it off...
*Nnnnngggg......*
Rott...en egg...bombs...
Space Nachos with Extra Guac, bitch

 

Not only was that foul, rank, and obscene. It came out your butt with a gale force wind!
That's what she said?
You're really reachin' here, aren't you?
Reachin' for your sweet...soul!
*Huzzah Asplode*
Can a soul truly be gay?

 

So then I'm like "WTF Dog?!"
You have lead the most fucked up life. Ever.
It's not like I coulda done anything about it!
You could have hit the dog and told him to knock it off...
Well, I it's not like I wanted him to stop...
I'm suddenly thinking that your soul isn't exactly a desirable item

 

Look! Earth! We're almost home!
'bout damn time.
My ass is SO SOOOOORE!
Wha-...Will-...Did you hurt it somehow?
Good lookin' out, Huzzah.
Why? Do you wanna kiss it and make it better?
I am unsure of whether or not a pucker on the posterior would aid your relief even if I were willing which I am not...at this juncture...able.

 

Oh thank god! Home!*smooch smooch smooch smooch*
Yeah, fucking fantastic. Which way is home? I gotta piss
I think there's a town near by. We can ask for directions.
Directions to the nearest gay bar perhaps
Ha ha! No so....oh shit.
I think I'll call you Toby. Because I can.

 

So...Reverend Jones told us to keep heading down this trail until we come to the old mill pond. Then wait.
Wait? For what?
Final Ascension.
If you were a woman, I'd beat you to death with a rusty eggbeater.
*SCHHLAPP!!*
...
Since you're somewhat middle ground as far gender goes, I can beat you NEAR death with my enormous penis instead!

 

So Huzzah was so "Ha ha I own your soul" this and "You're so gay" that, he didn't notice the increase in altitude...
He didn't notice this cliff either. I should feel sorry for him but I don't...
Pretty quiet up here...
...until the silence is pierced with your blood curdling girlie screech...

 

Looks like a storm is brewing.
I'd better head home. Huzzah can fend for himself.
You want I should work him over, boss?
Nah...you leave that to me and Mr. Pincers, Dino.

 

Why is it I have this deep fear that things are about to go from bad to worse?
Choppy...choppy...
SAY WHAT?!
"Not by the hairs on our chinny chin chins!" CLASSIC! HAHA!
It's so refreshing to see someone reading. They should do it more often.
Agreed.

 

Huzzah! How did you get home before me?
I caught a ride with a friend.
...you don't have friends.
I meant a stranger. A complete and total stranger.
So...do we wait for him to come through the door or do we just go out there and start maiming?
Huzzah told us to do what felt natural. Personally, I'd like to get to know him more as a person before breaking his will and pulling out his toenails.

 

Hey Huzzah where is my.....
What?
What the fuck?
What the fuck to you, too!
Think his head is gonna explode?
If it does before I get a chance to put a railroad spike in it, I'm going to be very upset...

 

What the hell are you doing down here?
Making a Molotov cocktail that I can throw the next time I see something strange.
Strange?
Y'know, two of you...three of you...Michael Landon's corpse having sex with A tutu-clad Winston Churchill...
...well, what the tampon for.
I heard if you shove it in tight enough, it's stops blood from spilling out of your gaping anus.

 

Can't sleep...will be devoured by pubic hair infused water drops....millions of them...rain is teh debil..
Poor guy. He's been cowering in the basement like this for three days...
What's to be afraid of? Sheesh, he's totally out of his fucking mind
Who're you and why're you in my house?
AAAAAAAAUUUUUUGH!

 

http://www.bash.org/?34296
ASL PLZ
oh why the hell does everyone always ask that, does it really metter what the fuck my asl is, obviously im not a kid and not very femenine so if you planning on hitting on someone just get a bat..
asl
you dont get it do you, I am not going to answer your friggin asl
y my dear?
you drink a lot dont you?

 

So I was bangin' this dude, right?
Naturally...
Wait...how did you know his name?
Shit...
He said he loved me...
That's what happens when you're on first base - everyone is bound to get on you eventually

 

Can you believe it? Jobs - we got jobs!
We're bottom rung temps at an evil corporation
See, but that's the thing. We climb the ladder and we can make changes from the inside. Changes for the better!
This coming from the guy who ritualistically tortured, maimed, and sexually abused me?
You just...you couldn't bring that up at a worse time, could you?
I heard there's donuts in the break room.

 

Well, I suppose we should get to work rather than wasting the day standing by the water cooler.
I suppose so. Hey, what position did they give you?
Assistant HR Manager. You?
...mail clerk.
Mail clerk? Well, that's...that's a good job too.
...sympathy from an inundated pubic hair. That makes me feel like a big man.

 

Dude, come on - mail clerk is a totally cool position. Oh, here's my OFFICE
Yeah whatever, oh by the way, this package is for you
Oh righteous! Homebaked cookies! Who're they from?
...the wood duck you convinced me was my mother...
mmm...chocolate chip
That's it, I'm going back to my cubical, getting my hole puncher, and going on a fucking rampage...

 

Speak Name and Passcode to Enter
Siegfried - One, Zero, Two, Seven
Fuck you, hippy. Why don't you take your uptight bullshit and blow it out your ass?
WHAT?! HOW DARE YOU!!!!!
Hehehe...this is what the suckers get for giving me an hour lunch break...
Wait a minute...I don't even HAVE a robotic door lock!

 

So, after I had snuck into his office....
I don't want to know, I really don't..
Oh c'mon, it's totally a classic!
Breaking into the CEO's office and messing with him is a classic?!
Just because he's rich and powerful doesn't mean he's going to seek revenge - I'm neither and I do it all the time!
Whatever you say, Huzzah, but if you see him wandering around with a hairdryer, I suggest you run.

 

I want to know who the hell thought it was so funny to break into my office!
But Siegfried, sir, he left no finger prints. Only a series of wet spots
God damnit! What good of a robot assistant are you!?
But you built me, sir, in your own image...
Yeah, but except my image isn't one of FAILURE
This would be much more easy to bear if you hadn't programmed me to feel pain...

 

What's up, Doc?
How is that funny?! A talking rabbit? Impossible, rabbits can't talk. Oh, and a carrot, nice stereotype! How is any of this funny?
It's something called "imagination" which allows us to depart from our stale world and laugh and dream in a world of fiction that may not conform to our real world definiton of "possible"
Pshh...how lame. That's not funny at all.
*BANG! THUD*
Really? Cuz I think it's fucking hilarious

 

*Click click click click click *
YOU'VE GOT MAIL!
Hmm... "Pervis, come to my office ASAP, signed Huzzah"
Wonder what that little psychopath wants now....
This better be the guy who broke into my office...
I swear on his life that he's the guy

 

It says here more and more people aren't quite understanding anything about our comic
And you're surprised? Who the hell is coming here for clarity or coherant plot lines?
It's either we're more random and vile than anyone else, or more peope have had their senses of humor removed than we thought...
A fair inquiry...
How th fuck should I know?
.....So what's with the ambulences?

Showing page 5.

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