Remember how you all forgot my birthday last year? Maybe this will refresh your memory. As you know, I went out with Nate for the weekend and most of the day today to celebrate his day of birth, and I came back with some sore calves from camping (the bathrooms were up a steep grade hill from our campsite, and you know pregnant women pee a lot). Anyhow, my birthday is approaching again and just so you don't forget, I'm having this contest. Also, on my birthday I'll be able to look back at how much (or little) you cared.

Theme of this contest: My birthday (May 10, I will be 20) Send me some birthday goodness.
Bonus rule: Include camping somehow.

Judging whenever the hell I feel like it, in about a week's time. Now take it off and start stripping!

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Mediocrity at its most average.

You knew this was coming ...

CC 240: The day after by kaufman 4-12-04

Dear kitty, Thank you so much for your gift of a dollar ... Dear MikeyG, Thank you very much for your generous gift of a dollar ... Everything's $1 Dear crabby, Thank you so much for that lovely Susan B. Anthony dollar ...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

CC #240 -- "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" starring Goo-Goo and Ying-Yang by biped 4-12-04

You say it's your birthday. Happy birthday to ya! On second thought, fuck birthdays. Yeah! Especially yours! You're getting old. No shit! Can't wait to rob your corpse, granny!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

CC #240 -- THE WONDROUS CYCLE OF LIFE by biped 4-12-04

YOUR FIRST BIRTHDAY Time for you to be born now. Oh boy! YIPPEE! YOUR PRESENT BIRTHDAY I'm taking you camping for your birthday, sweetiepie. Mmm...*BURP*...pie. Oh boy! YIPPEE! YOUR FINAL BIRTHDAY The test results are in. I'm afraid you only have a few hours to live. Oh boy! YIPPEE!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

CC 240: Chicka's Birthday Suprise! by little_kitty 4-12-04

Chicka, I got you the BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVAR! Sweet!!! Is it that airmattress for camping? Uh, no. A new bladder? A billion dollars? A new house? A fully paid wedding? A new form of painless childbirth? Well, actually it was Kajun_Firefly... You should have gotten me something USEFUL. I have to pee, so you better get cracking on that new bladder.

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Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

CC 240: Cornhappy Birthday by Rabid_Weasle 4-12-04

Hey Chicka! I got you a birthday present! Aww, how sweet of you. I sure hope it's a massager, my back is killing me. Uhhh... "...something like that."

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Poop.

This is my new experiment in artistic redumdamcy.

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

quote:

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This is my new experiment in artistic redumdamcy.

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CC 240: XX-Rated by kaufman 4-13-04

I turn 20 soon. I mentioned that in the forums, and am starting a contest based on that theme. Ah yes, I remember 20. Didn't have a girlfriend, got my wisdom teeth yanked, cut off my beard ... Somehow I don't think I'll be sharing your experiences. What? It was you who commented that your character was being cast as a lesbian too much. But if you REALLY want that girlfriend, I guess I can change the script...

CC 240: Stripcreator Training Pays Off by kaufman 4-13-04

Contestant #1: What is another term for 144? A gross. Contestant #2: What is another term for 13? A baker's dozen. Contestant #3: What is another term for 20? A SCROE!

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Long time since I've joined in one...

CC240: That old gag by maddog00 4-13-04

Hey, I hear its your birthday. Happy b'day. Yeah, thanks. Say on your b'day, you went camping and you woke up the next morn with vaseline and blood on your ass, would you tell anyone? No. Ha. Wanna go camping? Kinky.

Birthday Leer. by smamurai 4-13-04

Hey nice badge, whats it say? It says 'Congratulations Birthday Girl'. I will be the judge of that. 2 minutes later.. Yup! Those sure are nice badges. I'm only wearing one.

If The Jacket Don't Fit You Must Aquit. by smamurai 4-13-04

So, you been wearing that 'Happy Birthday' badge for a while? Just today. You wear it on this day each week? No, I tend to wear this type of badge only once every year. Is that your jacket? Stop looking for a loophole and admit you don't have a gift for me.

I Call Albert Einstein To The Stand. by smamurai 4-13-04

You say it's your birthday but have you taken jet-lag into account? What? I 've never been on a plane. It's my birthday today. You do realise that this year is a leap-year and the clocks usually go back around this time of year? Yes, but today is my birthday. Another year, another wrinkle. You know, maybe today is not my birthday.

Nappy Reruns. by smamurai 4-13-04

You just had a baby and it's your bithday? Wow many happy returns. Thanks, that's so nice of you. Yes I am sure you will be happy if your belly button, hips, bladder control, free time..... 8 minutes later.. ...satisfying sex life, admiring glances from men in the street, decent posture and boyfriend ever return. I will make it my lifes work to train my baby, to kill you all.

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

h...uh...happy...b..birthday!....

Happy Birthday Chi...uh...Chicka! by Streetproject 4-13-04

Hap...uh...hap..uh..uh....hm.. happ....uh..HAPPY....uh uh, hold your breath... I...g.g.....got...you..a..pre... pre...present...uh. ah, really, that is so sweet! Where is it? leme...ch..uh...check...on... y..your...present...f..for....it is that a trick question?

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[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v209/streetproject/edited%20photos/baby.gif[/IMG]

CC #240 -- "A NON-GODZILLA BIRTHDAY" not starring: Godzilla by biped 4-13-04

HEE HAW!!! ME DOG ON BALL!!! WHO AM YOU, BUTTFACE? BEEP-BEEP!!! *GASP* -- it's that fabulous celebrity, Dog On Ball! And he's acknowledging my existence! *swoon* IT AM YOUR BIRTHDAY TODAY? GOO-GOO!!! ME GIANT BABY!!! BIRTH HAPPY DAY, STUPID!!! GRRR!!! I...I think he just wished me a happy birthday! What a precious gift...(*sob*)...I can die happy now! DIE DIE DIE, HAPPY DIE!!! SHUT UP!!! WHOOPS -- ME BE NICE TO YOU TODAY!!! BOING-BWOING!!! O, Courage! Give me the strength...to ask him...to go camping with me!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

..........

Boinky and Biped. Like 2 peas in a pod.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

KKP, make like a dick sucking machine and suck my dick!

Pregnant Birthday Camping 1 by AnalWombat 4-13-04

Hey, baby! Guess what? I'm taking you camping for your birthday! Oooh, I always wanted to go camping! Yeah, sweetie, you've just got to be really careful. Oh, you're so sweet, honey, I will. Honey, why do I have to carry everything? I think I dropped the car keys. I thought I told you to be careful!

Pregant Birthday Camping 2 by AnalWombat 4-13-04

Why the hell am I carrying your child AND all the camping gear? Well, all that pregnancy weight, I figured camping gear would be a breeze.

Pregnant Birthday Camping 3 by AnalWombat 4-13-04

So I had to hike all the way here, carrying all the gear myself, sometimes YOU when you were tired, and pitch a tent myself! Happy fucking birthday to me! *snx snx snx* .... *snicker* What the hell is so funny? You said 'Pitch a Tent'!

Pregnant Birthday Camping 4 by AnalWombat 4-13-04

How's the fire coming, baby? Fine. I really resent the fact that you're sitting there relaxing when your pregnant fiance is doing all the work. Oh baby, I'm not relaxing. How relaxed can I be knowing my poor pregnant fiance has to do all the work?

Pregnant Birthday Camping 5 - End by AnalWombat 4-13-04

Mmmm....smells great, babe. I did the foraging, hunting, killing, skinning, and the cooking and you think YOU'RE going to get to eat? I would THINK so, baby. I'm going to need my strength for the oral pleasure you'll be giving me for dessert. .... POW! If by "oral pleasure" you meant "a frying pan upside your head", then dessert came early.

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I like cheese and panties. Together. Cheese wearing panties.

LE REVERIE by biped 4-13-04

Her mind is occupied by a single thought. CAMPING. Suddenly, another thought intrudes. BIRTHDAY. The two thoughts become intertwined. WEENIES. CAKE.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

It just cant be denied. The boinkmeister made his entry to these forums in exactly the same manner and with the same quality of comic.

Youre soul mates dude.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

Old Witch Fable by crabby 4-13-04

My favorite neice Gia! I've decided to pick you up on your birthday and take you out for a wonderful weekend of camping! I'm sorry miss but I've never seen you in my life. I have a sack of nickels in my bag. War time nickels minted from 1942 to 1945! Do you have any idea what that means? Well, during World War 2 The war time nickel was introduced to eliminate the use of nickel, which was needed for the war. Precisely, Now please join with me for a weekend of camping. All our equipment is unfortunetly buried with my ex husband so first we must dig up his glorious corpse. Well.........I do love camping.

Old Witch Fable 2 by crabby 4-13-04

My husband is buried just up ahead. You will have to dig him up because I just don't have the heart to see him in his current condition. Right. So then she told me she had a sack of War time nickels, but she promised to take me camping so, you know, I dug you up. If she wants her damn camping tools tell her to go to the pawn shop> I pawned that old lantern years ago to pay my gambling debts. Gambling debts? Gambling debts, underage male prostitutes? Whats the difference?

Old Witch Fable 3 by crabby 4-13-04

Gia, you should know that I have no intention of taking you camping. I plan to just let you sit around this abandoned factory and read my manuscripts. What the fuck! I've written quite a few manuscripts. But...I don't want to read them. Well, thats why I kidnapped you and am holding you at sock full of nickels point silly. Damn her and her crooked logic!

Old Witch Fable 4 by crabby 4-13-04

Most of these "manuscripts" are just recipes. This one is for butter. "Take one cup broth, mix with butter, add 2 spoons of sugar. Mix and enjoy!" I'm not even sure what that means. All the "manuscripts" that aren't just recipes are just pictures of puppies. Can I leave now your "manuscripts" are awful. Not yet, I still have one more surprise in store for you!

Old Witch Fable 5 by crabby 4-13-04

SURPRISE!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!! Nate! You disguised yourself as an elderly woman, kidnapped me with a sock full of war time nickels, forced me to dig up a corpse, then forced me to read manuscripts just to surprise me? Ok, I admit they weren't war time nickels They were just regular nickels. With a couple of pennies. You know I love war time nickels. ASSHOLE! So you ready to go to the party? Just take me home.

HA HA HA! Funny as shit, crabby. This entry is destined to be a classic.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Crabby = God

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

quote:

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Chicka: "You know I love wartime nickels! ASSHOLE!"

Nate: "So you ready to go to the party?"

Chicka: "Just take me home."

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The Chicka Zone by crabby 4-14-04

Imagine a woman. A woman with a date of birth. Once a year on the aniversary of this date of birth this woman enjoys celebrating her date of birth. Now imagine that a small internet community with which this woman is associated forgot this date of birth just one year ago. Then to get back at the community this woman won a contest and made the rule that everyone had to make a comic about her date of birth. Nobody could forget it now. Nobody.

The Chicka Zone 2 by crabby 4-14-04

May 10th Hey Nate know what today is? It's your Birthday my love! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I have a whole day planed, first we'll go to Arby's then we'll go out to a different Arby's! Mom I'm going to have to put you on speaker phone. I can't hear you over Nate singing Happy Birthday in the background. HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIA!!!!!! I'VE CANCELLED MY CAVING EXPEDITION IN ATLANTIS TO SPEND THE WHOLE DAY WITH YOU! NATE CALLED AND GAVE US DIRECTIONS TO THE SECOND ARBY'S WE'LL SEE YOU THEN!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Wow. Everyone is really pumped. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!

The Chicka Zone 3 by crabby 4-14-04

May 11th Holy shit I'm hung over. I didn't know Arby's sold mixed drinks. They do on your Birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!! My birthday was yesterday. Your birthday is a day which should be cherished, not just once a year but all year round. It is not just a day but an event. What are you talking about? HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

The Chicka Zone 4 by crabby 4-14-04

July 18th Nate, my water just broke we need to go to the hospital. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! Ughhghghghhohohohoughhh Thats great Gia. Now keep pushing just like we practiced at your Birthday classes. Happy Birthday! So how does my baby boy look doctor? Turns out it's not a boy at all, but rather a Birthday cake! Congratulations Gia it has your frosting!

The Chicka Zone 5 by crabby 4-14-04

May 10th What an awful dream. I dreamt everyday was my birthday. Actually it wasn't but people wouldn't stop celebrating it. Then I gave birth to a cake. That was weird. God, that was such an anoying dream. Hey babe, Happy Birthday. Go fuck yourself.