A few weeks ago, I got a bogus traffic ticket from a total arsehead cop. Help me vent my frustration with a comic about the police. Here are the guidelines:
1) new comics only
2) you must use three panels
3) at least one "cop" must appear in all three panels; either the cop from 'submitted' or the guard from 'office' counts
4) the third panel must contain at least one thought bubble
5) bonus for using the phrase "dry hump"
Have fun and good luck! Judging will be sometime around Sept 5th.

CC 366: Deputy Donkey by Rabid_Weasle 8-27-07

Sir, do you realize you were dry humping in a heavy petting zone? Wh-h-what? No I... I... TELL IT TO THE JUDGE CAPONE! This is your pal Deputy Donkey reminding you kids, just grope some titties!

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Poop.

CC 366: Toss the Doggy Salad by biped 8-27-07

Woofy the Crime Dog sez: "Woof! Woof!" Kids, what Woofy means is--"don't do drugs. Especially marijuana...it will turn you into a homidical maniac." Thanks, Woofy. Actually, "woof! woof!" meant "this alcoholic asshole has no idea that I dry-hump his face whenever he passes out."

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

RCL no. 1667 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 8-27-07

The furthering adventures of Blind Cop Justice... Tonight's episode: "Schwinng!" May I help you, officer? Ma'am, I'm writing you a citation for riding "Bike" in the middle of the road... [scribble, scribble ] Actually, I was only dry-humping Bike... But, can you blame me? He's soooo HANDSOME, and he's HUNG like a well-hung horse! Can't blame you a bit... I'm not gay, but if I were, I'd want to climb it, too! Um... Do you think all this flattery for Bike will get him to choose this comic to be the winner? I doubt that a person of such high INTEGRITY could be swayed so easily.

Potentially based on a true story.

CC366: From the mouths of babes... by themushroom 8-27-07

Spackletown PD - 10:12am Tuesday I have to cite you under Anti-Pervert ordinance 37.3.2.5 - "No unattended children may be seen in public." Innocent little girls such as you should not be outdoors. Bad things could happen. This carries a $50 fine. I wonder if a blowjob would change his mind...?

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

cc366: Routine traffic stop by mandingo 8-27-07

sir, do you know why i stopped you? i've got a handle on that, i think. the part i'm wondering about is why you dry humped my hood then beat my wife to death with your billy club do i tell you how to do your job? you did, actually. in between the hood-humping and wife-beating, there was a solid three or four minutes of suggestion i should probably run

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what if nigger meant kite

CC 366: The Retirement of Officer Farton by biped 8-27-07

Oink oink...oink oink...oink? OINK! OINK OINK OINK! OINK OINK! Buster witnessed you dry-humping that innocent horse, Farmer Heifitz. You're under arrest. Dang! I knew I shoulda had me a hog-killin' yestiddy! Well, this was my last case...and my divorce is almost final. Tell your mother I'm coming home...son. (GASP!) You finally acknowledged me! I love you, Dad.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

When I see some of Biped's entries I wonder if I should even bother. Doggy salad made me LOL! :D

But here goes anyway.

CC366: Dear Diary... My Boss Sucks by Hatrix 8-29-07

Sarge is it really necessary to keep reinacting my arrest of the senator? Yes it is. Now get back in that stall and drop your pants. Fine. But I'm warning you. This time.. no dry hump! Mmmm such a pretty mouth.

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“Life is intrinsically... boring and dangerous at the same time. At any given moment the floor may open up. Of course it almost never does; that's what makes it so boring.”--Ogdred Weary

And maybe one more. This is actually a kind of visualization of a joke I heard years ago.

CC366: Ask A Silly Question... by Hatrix 8-29-07

Caught you red handed this time Dr.Strangely. But I need to know.. why did you take only the vaginas of the victims? You fool! I bring them to life! I grow them! Sometimes six feet or more! I train them to talk and move on their own! MUAHAHAHAHA! WHAT? What in the hell do you do with a six foot talking cunt? Do you know how fast you were going? Not fast enough ya stupid twat.

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“Life is intrinsically... boring and dangerous at the same time. At any given moment the floor may open up. Of course it almost never does; that's what makes it so boring.”--Ogdred Weary

RCL no. 1670 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 8-29-07

Hmmph! HMMPH!! Well, this is been a BIG waste of time! GO FUCK YOURSELF, KOJAK! No need to get testy, Mr. "Limpy"... I'M not the one who forgot to read the interaction warn-ings on the labels! Note to self: taking both Viagra and Cialis at the same time does NOT, in fact, make one's dick twice as hard...

CC366: Tonight on FOX, a very special episode of COPS by themushroom 8-30-07

Spackletown PD, 12:46am, the morgue Let's see, I've got you for breaking & entering, intent to harm a corpse, corrupting virgins... ...keeping a bat within city limits without a permit, malicious mischief and vampirism... anything else? there goes necrophilia... BLAAAH! Would dry humping a police officer be considered sodomy?

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

CC 366: Without ReMorse by kaufman 8-31-07

Tap_taaap_taaap tap_taaap taaap_tap taaap_tap tap_taaap tap_tap_taaap_tap tap_tap_taaap tap_tap_tap tap_tap_tap_tap taaap_tap_taaap tap_tap_tap_tap tap_tap taaap_tap_taaap_tap Senator's drunk tonight.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

cc: 366 - dirty cop felt me up by arbi 8-31-07

"A few weeks ago, I got a bogus traffic ticket from a total arsehead cop. Help me vent my frustration with a comic about the police." Happened to me too. True story. I was on rt 40 a bit east of town. Got a ticket for a california rolling stop. I pulled off the road to a safe place, and the cop freaked. He did a terry stop and frisk, then went thru my pockets, then called for backup and a k9 unit to dryhump my plymouth sundance I showed him my bar card - I'm a lawyer - and chose not to answer many of his questions. They threatened to take my car after I wrote down their names. I usually have good intentions about following up with letters and depositions, but then I don't get around to it. Maybe we can use stripcreator to shine a little light on officer friendly here. stay tuned.

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woof

CC 366: DRY HUMPENSTEIN! by Rabid_Weasle 9-02-07

RUN! IT'S DRYHUMPENSTEIN! What do you mean he's only 2 years old?

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Poop.

CC 366: TRICK R STAB! by Rabid_Weasle 9-02-07

And that's when the stranger said to my husband, "TRICK R STAB!" To which your husband replied...? I can wait all night, bitch.

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Poop.

CC 366: I'm No Good At Stories by Milez72 9-03-07

So may I ask why you were dry humping the fence, whilst covered in camoflage body paint? ...Well...you see...I was trying to make sure that no matter what the threat, the security stopped it. Well done officer. Shit, he's not buying it. TOBOR has a new cellmate.

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Fear not! For I have nachos!

http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/JohanC

RCL no. 1673 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 8-31-07

The furthering adventures of Blind cop Justice... ...and, furthermore, I am NOT gay! Got it. Um, is there anything else you'd like to add to your statement, senator? Well, besides that I am not gay, I want it understood that I am a happily married man, and that I love my children, and, once-and-for-all, I AM NOT GAY!! So, in other words: You're GAY. Yes, I am... You got a problem with gay lifestyle? No. Well, except for that whole taking-it-up-the-ass part...

First off, thanks to everyone who participated.

Honorable mentions go to RCLG for his brilliant brown-nosing and themushroom for sheer perversity.

But the win goes to Hatrix for keeping up with current events and remembering that nothing beats some good old fashioned gay bathroom action!

my favorite was the one with the cop in it

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what if nigger meant kite

bike

Woohoo :D Nothing like the smell of a fresh comics competition in the morning! Oh wait... that's the cat box.

I'd like to thank the senator for being the typical self-hating, closeted, cruisy -the-rules-don't-apply-to-me, pageboy loving repugnican we've come to know and loathe :D  They make it TOO easy. 

I'll get started on the new one immediately.

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“Life is intrinsically... boring and dangerous at the same time. At any given moment the floor may open up. Of course it almost never does; that's what makes it so boring.”--Ogdred Weary

Damn  I knew Hatrix's comic was the winner when I read it.  GOod job...

 I wish I could win one of these again cuz I have a great idea for a contest...

Whee, I'm perverse!! I'm perverse! *NOT taking a bow*

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.