I'm back from my poo!  Okay, my few minutes in the lounge and that skeleton in the outhouse thing that says five phrases (available at Walmart, check it out; my favorite line is "uuuhnnngg, all through here... uh, maybe not" cuz we all know skeletons are full of fecal matter) reminded me of what I enjoy most in the world:  fart jokes.

And not just any fart jokes, no sirree!

This CC numbered 401 must contain the following two elements and they can appear in any panel:

a) You must mention methane.

b) You must use the Misc:Explosion background.... *boom*

Bonus points if you get both elements, with a plot or good premise, into one panel.  More if we actually see turds fly.  Automatic winner if the turds coldcock John McCain.

Contest will end October 1, since I figure the selection of Christmas goods at Kmart will be on sale by then. 

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

cc401: You and Mie, and Kei, makes three by mandingo 9-22-08

when i was a kid, dad would blame tiny elephants running by whenever he farted at the dinner table. opinion was split on this. mom HATED it, but we kids thought it was the funniest damn thing but then mom actually died in a freak elephant stampede at the zoo and it was unanimous

i broke both the rules but if it helps i did so while farting and blowing shit up

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what if nigger meant kite

CC401 by bike 9-24-08

"in 2006, Barack Obama voted to fund a study of methane gasses created by cows..." mooooo "methane is a gas that terrorists can use to make explosives to kill our troops" durka durka "What new way to kill Americans will Barack Obama want to fund next? We can't afford to find out!" I'm John McCain and I approve this message

What do you think of me now!

Famous Debates- Inspired by Seanator. by Beeko180 9-11-08

I have slept with ten women I have slept with 29 women and 1 man. I have overpopulated Goodna. I have overpopulated America The End. I have six moles on my back. I have a freckle on my weewee.

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You have my most solemn and honourbound of vows that clicking this link will not direct you to a youtube video of a rick roll

CC 401: It's a gas by NeoVid 9-25-08

Houston, come in. We've got trouble. Air pressure in the cabin has been increasing for hours, and we can't figure out how to stop- I told you we shouldn't have given the astronauts Mexican food. Damn.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

Groovy! - You say "LOVE" and I say "RUB" by edoggydog 9-25-08

(This an homage to Wise Guys starring Danny DeVito and Joe Piscopo...) Dude... The other day I went to go get a massage at that new Japanese parlor... Groovy! So, I ask how long the massage will last and the Asian girl said, "Me rub you rong time!" HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHA- [ *sniff...sniff* ] Who farted? ========== Ka-BOOM!! ===========

Here's the joke: What do you get when Two burglars lose a bomb?

Here's the Answer. 

What really happened on 9/11 by Beeko180 9-25-08

One Dramatic day on September 11.... Where'd you put the bomb? Oops. And the Methane? Haaaaaappy Haaappy Haaappy *Fart* And so the World Trade Centre is thus destroyed.

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You have my most solemn and honourbound of vows that clicking this link will not direct you to a youtube video of a rick roll

Just thought of it.

Barnyard by Beeko180 9-26-08

Halfway through the movie, Shortly after the donkey knocks out the farmer with methane gas. What the hell is that- How'd my shoe get over there? He's buying it. Must have fallen off me foot........ He's NOT buying It!! Get the AN ENORMOUS FART ECHOES THROUGH SPACE

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You have my most solemn and honourbound of vows that clicking this link will not direct you to a youtube video of a rick roll

CC401 & WW60: This Superhero Really Stinks! by fpd 9-27-08

While out with his pal Charlie the Chatty Cat, Gus Small spots trouble afoot. Crikey! Will you look at that? This looks like a job for ... No, no, don't do it! Don't change into ... Ingesting a mysterious musical fruit he discovered while exploring the bottom of the world, Gus Small transforms into ... Methane Man! Cease and desist your villainy, foul miscreant! Who are you calling foul, you red cut cheese? Peeyoo!

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FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

Boom by dcomposed 9-28-08

Hey do you know the rules for the current Comic Competition? Yeah you have to use the word methane and have this explosion background. Thanks. Are you going to enter? No. Why not? I'd never know how to work the damn word and background in.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

bike

I voted this good because it is the most political fart joke evah. :)

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“Life is intrinsically... boring and dangerous at the same time. At any given moment the floor may open up. Of course it almost never does; that's what makes it so boring.”--Ogdred Weary

Here's one I thought I'd make.

Jhon Mcain And the Flying Fiasco by Beeko180 9-28-08

One fine day during a bombardment of methane gas bombs....... I'm John McCain I'm Flying! I'm Falling! Meanwhile. Beeko180 is shooting the Bloopers for an episode of The A.R.B Collection. *Fart* This is why I don't drink coffee.

 

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You have my most solemn and honourbound of vows that clicking this link will not direct you to a youtube video of a rick roll

CC 401:) by Hari_Nezumi 9-30-08

Hey man. What's going on, dude? Not much. You check out Spore yet? Nah man, I ain't got the money for that. It any good? Eh. It's OK. Methane.

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More lust than you can shake a stick at.

12:53 a.m. PST, 10/01:  Thank the deity of your choice, or invent one (it works!), that this bitch ends in twelve hours.  Fart jokes among adults stink, we need more ten year old boys here.

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

Is this more kiddy for you?

CC: 401- World War III: The Fart at Gallipoli by Beeko180 10-01-08

During a sleep over, the girls are trying to get over the methane war......... *arm pit fart rhythm to the chicken dance* Fart fart fart-fart-fart-fart fart fart ROFLOL FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART FART, FART FART FART FART FART FART FART- [fart] John McCain will live on in our hearts......... As a bald loser. Goodbye cruel world!

 

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You have my most solemn and honourbound of vows that clicking this link will not direct you to a youtube video of a rick roll

I Remember Timmy by christopher7murphy 10-01-08

Okay class, remember that methane gas is highly combustable. Timmy, do you want to light my fart this time? Yes, Miss Bliss. Oh, my. That was really a juicy one.

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Insert Theme to Mannix here

CC 401: Das Bombe by TheGovernor 10-02-08

The building has been evacuated but I must warn you the bomb has a tilt switch, the slightest vibration could set it off. Don't worry, Winston the Flatulent German Bomb Defusing Pig is a professional. Man das vas zer gut chilli cabbage. Now back to ze verk.

Okay, it was a tough one.  Not because of all the good choices, there weren't many.  This is of course my fault, it was a stupid idea for anyone over age 15... farts are a folly of youth.  I apologise for creating such a terrible CC.  But you all suck at it anyhow.

So there were three that truly cracked me up and I wish I could split the prize.  Just cut it down the middle.  But that didn't work with the kid in the divorce and it won't work here.

So between NeoVid's "It's A Gas" (you ever hear of Jose Jiminez?), fpd's "Methane Man" dual entry, and christopher7murphy's "I Remember Jimmy".......

Sorry, NeoVid, you got spiked.  christopher7murphy killed me by using the word "juicy" like any good 10 year old would FTW.

Have at it.  Where's the Glade? 

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

Dammit!

Someday, I'll get to use the contest idea I had last year.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

You came close.  Damn close.  If only C7M's comic hadn't used used "juicy".  I try to pull for the Underdog but Polly Purebred beats me to it (the shoeshine boy doesn't seem to mind the pawprints).

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

Truth be told, I did have an unfair advantage. I've been farting all my life.

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Insert Theme to Mannix here