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Stripcreator » Comic Competitions » CC 83: Dating Disasters!

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Drexle
Your Cure for Lameness

Member Rated:

Yes! I broke my 40ish contest losing streak! I feel as though I've finally scored after loads and loads of bad dates. Speaking of which...

Everyone who's been dating could give you at least one rather insane story of a date gone awry. The stripcrator characters are no different in that every single one of them has an active dating life, and they're all totally insane.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to pick a stripcreator character and make one, two, hell, a whole series if you want, of comics about their dating life. It can be annecdotes from your real life, things that you only wish would happen in your dreams, things from your worst nightmare, whatever...

The only catch when it comes to multiple entries from a single person is that the entries all have to focus on the exploits of one central character. For example, if your first strip is about a date between DragonXero and dogonball, one of those two must be the focus of all your following dating comics in this contest.

I thought about adding some additional ****ed up conditional things to screw around with you all, but I'll leave this contest open fairly ended.

For those who remember the last time I ran one of these, having a sick sense of humor will take you a long way.

You have approximately 76 hours, so start your engines and let the dating games begin!

12-02-01 9:04am (new)
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skagg
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

cc83 aaarrrggghh!!! by skagg
12-02-01
ok breathmints. check. cheap aftershave. check. flowers picked from the park. check.
god i hope this goes well, ive been single for so long
oh hey, you must be sexyboy_xxxx! come on in sugarlips
thank **** im wearing my running shoes!

---
Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

12-02-01 10:33am (new)
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kramer_vs_kramer
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Hurrah! My muse has returned!

CC83 - Depression and Emotional Pain by kramer_vs_kramer
12-02-01
So what do you do?
Well, I'm studying sociology at university and...
No no no. That's not what I meant...
I mean what do you do? Spit or swallow?

12-02-01 1:03pm (new)
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Drexle
Your Cure for Lameness

Member Rated:

quote:
Hurrah! My muse has returned!
And the angels did sing!

12-02-01 1:13pm (new)
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skagg
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

i can see this being a very fun cc

cc83 gutted by skagg
12-02-01
hmmm a strip about dating eh? i wonder what the skaggmeisters got in store for me
hmm, i see a comfy bed over there, this could be good! hurry up and draw skaggyboy you lazy ****
call me a lazy **** will ya?
oh you have got to be ****ing kidding me
me love you long time

---
Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

12-02-01 1:15pm (new)
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skagg
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

****, just realised the mutiple entries thing

ok ignore the first one, im doing a redux

---
Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

12-02-01 1:17pm (new)
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skagg
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

like apocalypse now redux

cc83 aaarrrggghh!!! redux by skagg
12-02-01
ok breathmints. check. cheap aftershave. check. flowers picked from the park. check.
god i hope this goes well, ive been single for so long
oh hey, you must be sexyboy_xxxx! come on in sugarlips
thank **** im wearing my running shoes

---
Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

12-02-01 1:25pm (new)
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kramer_vs_kramer
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

CC83 - I'm never going to lose any of my old letters. by kramer_vs_kramer
12-02-01
You may have noticed that throughout this date I have been writing on a clipboard. Would you like to see what's on it?
Ewwww! Is that a picture of me having sex with a horse?
No no no. Of course it isn't.
It's meant to be a donkey.

12-02-01 1:31pm (new)
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Bogart
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

My first blind date - 1 by Bogart
12-02-01
You must be Bogart.
What? Oh... So you're Alice. Nice to meet you.
He's younger than I was told.
I thought Jack said she was in 8th grade, same as me! She must be in high school already!
Is he just going to stand there admiring my rack all night?
Condom... condom... I hope I still have that one I swiped from my father last New Years.
My first blind date - 2 by Bogart
12-02-01
I've been looking forward to this movie! Oh look, here come some of my friends!
Damn! Now she'll spend the movie talking with them!
Hi there!... uh... Are you baby sitting or something?
It's a mercy date for a friend. Long story. Where are you sitting? Let's go.
My first blind date - 3 by Bogart
12-02-01
I can't believe she ditched me.
Me either. She's got a lot of nerve. So... what are you gonna do now?
Who are you?
Janet. My older brother built a treehouse and now he's gone. You wanna go there?
Follow me.
...
My first blind date - 4 by Bogart
12-02-01
No one will find us here.
Yeah this is cool. So why did we...
You were saying?
Condom... condom... I hope I still have that one I swiped from my father last New Years.

12-02-01 2:30pm (new)
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fpd
Doctor of Fine Parody

Member Rated:

CC83: Rosemary's Blind Dates by fpd
12-02-01
Hey baby, want to suck face?
Ew, gross! Get away from me tentacle face!
There isn't a human woman I would like to probe more than you, Rosemary.
I thought you were different from other guys! I'm outta here!
Rosemary, my dear, your beauty could tempt the angels from heaven.
Oh Nick, you sure know how to sweet-talk a lady.

---
FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

12-02-01 3:46pm (new)
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Kitty_Kat
Stripcreator Regular

Member Rated:

My blind date by Kitty_Kat
12-02-01
My......Friend hooked me up on this date, so he better be good.
What am I saying. My.... friend treats me like ****. He's probobly just a boozer. I'm just gonna hightail it out of here.
I wonder if my dates here yet???

This is a little like my first blind date. It turns out I went away from a really hot guy, and I had to explain why I wasn't there. I really hate my.... freind. She always does thingsd to spite me, so I don't trust her.

---
My life totally and completely REEKS.

12-02-01 4:35pm (new)
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crabby
I have an awesome avatar.

Member Rated:

BAD by crabby
12-02-01
Why hello there. Babysitting huh?
Well actually this is my baby I had to come pick up some diapers cause it's all out and my girlfriend says she can't wear a paper bag.
Oh i see. So............why would you wanna use a paper bag are you dumb?
I'm not really sure whats going on. I'm new to this baby thing and I'm just trying the best I can so whats going on with you?
Well I was gonna ask for your number but your obviously taken.
I wonder if I'm allowed to date?

12-02-01 5:49pm (new)
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fuzzyman
Alpha Geek

Member Rated:

Internet Dating - Episode 1 by fuzzyman
12-02-01
HELLO?
Ummm... RedHot_30? It's NiceGuy_89. We Met on the Internet. I'm here for our date...
I'LL BE DOWN IN JUST A MINUTE!
I hope she's cute. I hope she's cute. I hope she's cute.
HEY, YOU'RE CUTE!
eep.

Internet Dating - Episode 2 by fuzzyman
12-02-01
NICE RESTAURANT. GLAD WE GOT A TABLE OUTSIDE.
Ye Gods, I hope no one I know sees me with this girl.
SO... YOU'RE SO QUIET! TELL TOBOR... WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE?
Oh, I don't know... "Lawrence of Arabia," I guess. Or maybe "Star Wars." What's yours?
TOBOR HAS A HARD TIME DECIDING BETWEEN "THE CRYING GAME" AND "ANAL ASSAULT 2."
eep.

---
...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

12-02-01 6:25pm (new)
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Emmi
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

BOOYAKA! I am so gonna lose...XD These others are great!

Boom Baby! 18 by Emmi
12-02-01
C'mon Seth. Let's go out...just once? PLEASE?
No.
SETH! I have been nothing but PATIENT with you! can't you reward me with just one date?
...Fine. Be ready at 8.
Oh I am SO getting some tonight...
You do know, you aren't getting any tonight, right?

---
"Wait...thats not porn, its a furniture commercial!!!" ~Me "Yes, I have a big *****" ~Me "That ***** looks like a couch..." ~ VB IM me on AIM at: oOUtadaHikkiOo

12-02-01 7:03pm (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

I'm going to have fun with this, but it will take a while to write. For now let me spoon you the setup.

Oh, by the way, if you haven't seen Ruthless People, what's your problem?

CC 83.01: Prologue by kaufman
12-02-01
Dave, long time no see!
What's up, Stick?
I've been reading.
You? Reading? Ok, I'll bite, what have you been reading?
"For a good time, call Marsha. 673-4095.
Ha ha ... uh, what was that number?

CC 83.02: In A Gadda DeVito by kaufman
12-02-01
Hello?
Hello, is, uh, Marsha there?
She can't talk right now. She's got my **** in her mouth.
*click*
I LOVE wrong numbers.

CC 83.03: Phone Call, Take Two. by kaufman
12-02-01
So she gives head to other guys. That doesn't mean she won't show me a little fellowship ... I'll try her again.
Hello, is this Marsha? My name's Dave; how'd you like to have dinner with me?
Oh, sure? Where shall we go?
Uh, how about McDonalds?
Can we go somewhere else? I hate Scottish food.

CC 83.04: At First Sight by kaufman
12-02-01
You're ...
... Marsha?
Uh huh.
Short for "Martian," if you must know.

CC 83.05: And Phobos is a Vietnamese Restaurant by kaufman
12-02-01
What may I bring you tonight?
I'll have the kung pao chicken.
And I'd like the moo shu Arean sandworms.
But ...
It's true. They landed on Mars 15 years ago, but your government's been denying and blacking it out ever since.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

12-02-01 8:49pm (new)
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markw
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

First post to the forums, so forgive any screwups.

12-02-01 9:04pm (new)
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markw
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Ok, see, like that, that was a screw up.

Don't know why the build a link code isn't working for me, so here it is:

http://www.stripcreator.com/view.php?ID=45748

12-02-01 9:08pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

And entry (such as it is)...
A Nightmare by Spankling
12-02-01
I don't know, Jael, my tastes are a bit...
Stop thinking up excuses! Just be ready at 7:00. I already told it... I mean... her you would be there.
*sigh* All right. You win.
Well duh! But don't worry. This chick is easy. Hard to figure out sometimes, but easy.
At a hip-hoppin joint...
Oh my... You look like you could... pinch!
It looks like you're trying to hit on my. How may I help?

And some old business just for ****s and giggles.
So, Why "Spankling?" by Spankling
6-08-01
My father and minister conspired to hire a prostitute to chaperone a sleepover in our church one summer night when I was about 13.
I can't believe this is happening!
So young and tender... I could make him do just about anything!
They chose her well. She had an outrageous body and showed up wearing a thin white blouse with a black lace bra underneath.
There are, like, 7 other guys on this sleepover. Where did they go?
I'll just separate this one from the herd and have a little fun.
She wanted us to screw under the cross on the alter, but that weirded me out too much. So I spent the night wrestling and spanking her in the youth room.
Damn! My_hands_are_raw from_slapping_her_ass! How am I ever gonna jerk off after this?
Come on boy! Put your arm into it!
Why would your father and minister set you up with a *****? by Spankling
6-08-01
People_had_strange_ideas back then. They didn't mean to steer me toward hookers. They thought by awakening a part of me that was draw to the fairer sex...
They wanted to make sure he didn't turn out gay.
And did it work?
Are you kidding? You should have seen this woman!
Yeah. I was hot.

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

12-02-01 10:18pm (new)
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BigEvilDan
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

CC 83: Dr. Pedantic Dates A Woman by BigEvilDan
12-03-01
March 12th, 1960.
CC 83: Dinner... by BigEvilDan
12-03-01
...and those are all of the scientific and technical flaws in "Star Trek".
Won't this guy ever stop talking?
But enough about my life. Let's talk about you.
Well...
Here's a listing of all the flaws I've discovered about you this evening...
CC 83: ...and a Movie by BigEvilDan
12-03-01
There is absolutely no way that a man could survive a fall from that height without a parachute. Especially when suffering from a bullet wound.
That radiation would kill him, not give him superior strength. And if he can really crush cars, how is his daughter surviving that hug?
Those were some pretty good trailers. I can not wait to see the actual movie.
Oh god. He'll never believe that Julia Roberts would leave her rich fiance for a waiter. It's going to be a LOOOONG movie.
CC 83: Pedantic, the Love Doctor by BigEvilDan
12-03-01
Well, that was certainly an interesting evening.
Do you mind if I come in?
When I said interesting, I meant horrible. If you're planning on getting some, think again.
"Getting some" what?
SLAM!
I'll just wait here until you finish that sentence.

---
"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a *****." - Donald B. Jones III

12-03-01 9:20am (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

Those were wonderful, Dan, but that won't stop me from posting installments 6-10 of my epic ...

CC 83.06: Where There's Smoke There's Ire by kaufman
12-03-01
My meal is too cold. I'm going to send it back for reheating.
Don't bother. I can take care of that.
Whoa, is that like some sort of portable microwave?
Even better. See that guy smoking over there? Watch what I can do to his fork.

CC 83.07: Unusual Occurrences in the Dessert by kaufman
12-03-01
My fortune cookie says, "Keep your feet on the ground and reach for the stars."
Mine says, "It is a big man who has little fear."
Wait, here's another. "Earn thousands of dollars working from your own home ..."
Dammit, I HATE pop-up ads!

CC 83.08: Things are Looking Up ... by kaufman
12-03-01
Shall we go to a movie now?
Sure, there's a place down the street that specializes in old science fiction films.
Really, what's playing there?
"Mars Needs Women."
It does? I was afraid of that. Gotta go!
Hey, mind if I tag along?

CC 83.09: The Sauceror's Apprentice by kaufman
12-03-01
Now whatever you do, don't hit that button I'm pointing at.
Don't worry, I won't touch a thing.
Oh, and hang on, the acceleration can be ...
Oooof!
... rough. You didn't hit it, did you?
Hello. It looks like you have requested my assistance in interplanetary travel. Would you like help?

CC 83.10: With Phrens Like That, Who Needs Enemies? by kaufman
12-03-01
You hit your head pretty badly. Are you going to be ok?
I think so, though I feel like I have a bump the size of Iowa. I'll make some phrenologist back on Earth VERY happy.
Pardon the interruption, but Brad and I just wanted to let you know that this is the first ever use of "phrenologist" in a stripcreator comic.
This will send the Google hits off the charts. Please send money to support us. Now, back to our story.
... Two on Uranus and one on Pluto!
Ha ha ha ha, stop that! It hurts my head when I laugh.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

12-03-01 10:30am (new)
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itsclark
Bar Room Superman

Member Rated:

The mad scientist has a more active dating life than I do. I've posted this before, but I'll toss it in the ring in case nothing better comes up...

Out-Dated by itsclark
10-14-01
You aren't at all what I imagined based on the information the dating service gave me.
I mean, a cosmetology correspondence course stretches the definition of "college educated" -- don't you think?
Well what about you? You described yourself as physically buff!
Did I? I meant to say I was a "physics buff".

---
"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

12-03-01 2:12pm (new)
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Kevin_Keegans_Perm
Bean There, Done That

Member Rated:

CC 83 - Dating Disasters by Kevin_Keegans_Perm
12-03-01
Wow , you know , that was a great evening. I know just how we can top it off.
Oooh , this just gets better and better. And to think i had my hand down he blouse the whole movie ...
Ill just slip into something more ...comfortable.
Damn. I am going to be sore in the morning. Im taking this ***** six ways from sunday.
Well , what do you think?
And i thought this only happened in Austin Powers movies.

CC 83 - Dating Disasters - 2 by Kevin_Keegans_Perm
12-03-01
You dont like the way i look when im naked?
Youre a ....robot. But how. I mean , i had my hands on your breasts , i was stroking your thigh. How did i ....
Fail to notice? Well , its because im designed to generate body heat and fluids just like a real woman.
So , despite you looking like the Terminator , youre really a robotic Traci Lords?
I taught that 2 bit ***** every trick she knows. Im as flexible as plastic , and strong as steel.
And when im done , youre going to be recycled baby.

CC 83 - Dating Disasters - 3 by Kevin_Keegans_Perm
12-03-01
*unf*unf*unf*unf* .... yes , just in there , just OHHHHHHHH YES
*clang*clang*clang *clang *clang*
Jeezus. That IS flexible. Id have broken my last Girlfriends back if she bent that far over.
Now , watch this , for my greatest trick
OH MY FUCKING GOD. YOU CAN REMOVE YOUR HEAD!
And wait till you see what my tongue does ...

CC 83 - Dating Disasters - 4 by Kevin_Keegans_Perm
12-03-01
The Afterglow.

---
"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

12-03-01 3:02pm (new)
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ladyjdotnet
Snitcreator

Member Rated:

This is exactly how it went. Doing this entry brought on a violent shuddering attack. I'd better win. I mean it.

Truth is sadder than fiction - Part I by ladyjdotnet
12-03-01
When analyzing a dating disaster, it is important to think back to the beginning and figure out who made the first mistake. In this case, it was me.
The first mistake was that I broke my cardinal rule about dating guys from the internet whom I've never met before. I gave the guy my home address.
The second mistake was allowing myself to be summoned by a car horn.

Truth is sadder than fiction - Part II by ladyjdotnet
12-03-01
In email, he had asked me out for dinner and a movie.
So, I figure we'll eat first, k?
Sounds good to me.
He took me to a dirty, understaffed, cheap diner.
Order anything you want!
Hmmm, I'll have a club sandwich with fries.
He checked the contents of his wallet under the table.
Just a glass of water for me, thanks!

Truth is sadder than fiction - Part III by ladyjdotnet
12-03-01
I ate my sandwich. He ate complementary bread.
She's purty.
He's shorter and fatter than he looks in his pictures.
We silently evaluated one another.
She has big booblies.
He must have a cat. There's hair all over his sweater.
We made... discoveries.
Her booblies jiggle when she chews.
Oh good Lord. That's not cat hair! It's GROWING through the sweater!

Truth is sadder than fiction - Part IV by ladyjdotnet
12-03-01
Dating etiquette says that the person who does the asking does the paying, unless other arrangements were agreed upon before the date.
But I didn't want this dud to think I "owed" him anything...
How about you let me pay for my meal?
What? No! Don't be silly! Well... all right. If you insist.

Truth is sadder than fiction - Part V by ladyjdotnet
12-03-01
It became clear to me that he had no idea what a disaster this date was.
So! What movie do you want to see?
How about you just take me home now?
I mean, he *really* had no idea.
Oh, really? Wow.
No... I mean... I have an early morning tomorrow. Let's call it a night.
None.
So, when can we do this again?
Um, never.

[Click to view comic: 'Truth is sadder than fiction - The End']

---
I am a delicate ****ing flower.

12-03-01 3:14pm (new)
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NeoVid
Stripcreator Irregular

Member Rated:

&%$*! First contest in weeks I have a lot of ideas for, and my comp won't let me make strips right now! Mother#$@&!

---
"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

12-03-01 5:21pm (new)
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israphael
Stripcreator Veteran

Member Rated:

These are strips that I'm working up as episodes in my mini-series "The Love That Dare Not" regarding the ongoing relationship between Maura and Eugene.

The first three strips are about Maura's first meeting with Eugene's parents.

CC83a: Meeting the Parents by israphael
12-03-01
Eugene, you look thin. Have you been eating? How are your bowel movements?
MOTHER! I'm a grown man. I'm fine. Anyway, I want you to meet my girlfriend, Maura.
So let me meet the little ***** who is stealing my baby boy from me.
Well, that went better than I expected.

CC83b: Meeting the Parents by israphael
12-03-01
What Eugene saw.
It's a real pleasure to finally meet you. I feel like I already know you, Eugene's told me so many wonderful things about you.
What his mother saw.
Where do ya keep the booze. Travelin' sure makes a gal thristy. What a ****hole this town is. Christ, who do you have to **** to get a drink around here?
What his father saw.
It's the bottom of the ninth inning. The score is tied. Two outs. The count is 2 and 2. It's the pitch. And a hit. It's going... going...

CC83c: Meeting the Parents by israphael
12-03-01
No one in our family has ever dated one of you hairless monkeys. Oh, we once had a strange aunt who lived with a lemur with a bad case of mange. But we don't like to talk about that.
Yeah, I was a army ranger in 'Nam. One mission I was the only survivor of my platoon and stranded behind enemy lines. Had to walk back 60 miles to camp. Killed 15 vietcong using only a knife.
Please tell me you were adopted.

BTW, the question about the bowel movements comes directly from real life. The story about 'Nam also comes from personal experience, the father of one of my girlfriend's told me that story while I was waiting to pick her up. I guess he meant it as some form of intimidation. It didn't stop me from fooling about with his daughter though.

In the last strip, the table is turned, Eugene meets Maura's father.

CC83d: Meeting the Parents by israphael
12-03-01
It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Eugene. It's reassuring to know that Maura is dating someone so bright and upstanding.
Oh, that's good. I thought you might be upset by the idea of Maura dating outside of her species.
Not at all, in fact I once dated a horse back in my college days.
Great, now he's going to try to convince me how liberal he is.
Come to think of it, you do remind me a lot of him.
That's nice of you to say... Wait a second. Him? That can't be right... Oh.

---
"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

12-03-01 7:18pm (new)
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