Top Rated Comics Archive

This static page shows every comic captured in sc_toprated_comics when the archive was generated.

3451. Mr. Optimism makes a house call

by mandingo on August 11, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Mr. Optimism makes a house call by mandingo 8-11-05
wonder where my husband is?	no, he's not	I SAID, NO HE'S NOT! have you SEEN his secretary?

3452. random comic 7

by mandingo on July 31, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

random comic 7 by mandingo 7-31-05
i'm a bad squirrel bad squirrel *WAPSH*	i'm a very bad squirrel bad squirrel *WAPSH*	with a gigantic, gigantic dick bad squreally?

3453. 4 cups of sugar

by mandingo on July 26, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

4 cups of sugar by mandingo 7-26-05
		what?

3454. what if nigger meant story

by mandingo on July 29, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

what if nigger meant story by mandingo 7-29-05
here at Channel 3 News, we pride ourself on reporting the most important niggers. the murderer niggers, rapist niggers, robbery niggers, every nigger you need to know about to keep your family safe	of course, all the other news stations have niggers as well. let's face it, you can't report the news without broadcasting a lot of niggers	but only Channel 3 gives you hourly updates on the day's top niggers. because some niggers you need to know about as soon as possible

3455. Marlborenouncing Man

by RedfeatheR on January 22, 2008
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Marlborenouncing Man

I wish I knew how to quit you!

by RedfeatheR, 1-22-08

3456. Kajun and Boorite's Road to Iraq

by KajunFirefly on May 2, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Kajun and Boorite's Road to Iraq by KajunFirefly 5-02-05
Speak to your leader, infidel! Beg for your release! You call THAT a weapon? At home I keep a hammer that I've glued razor blades to.	I know what you're thinking, how can you possibly humilate a guy with no pants? Actually, I was wondering why your wife isn't wearing her burka.	..and finally, two hostages were released in Karbala today, officials say they were disorientated and confused but mostly unharmed. The two men were returned to their several wives with only mild liver poisoning. Their captors, two transvestites, are believed to still be at large.

3457. Ranger's World presents: "Yep, It's True!"

by Ranger77 on April 29, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "Yep, It's True!" by Ranger77 4-29-05
Yahoo (via Reuters) April 28, 2005 I heard Denny's is getting sued again. One of your managers kicked out a bunch of Arab guys saying "We don't serve bin Ladens here." Pretty harsh... The news reports were based on comments taken out of context.	Ah...."out of context." That's original. Listen kid, we just got tired of all those bounced checks. We simply told Mr. Ladden...or as we knew him Ben, the next time he and his friends tried to write a bad check we would not....	Dude, you're reaching. Stop now before you hurt yourself. Do you even KNOW how much time and effort goes into putting together a plate of "Moon Over my Hammy?"

3458. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"

by Ranger77 on April 13, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille" by Ranger77 4-13-05
You know, you and I haven't really gotten along and that's mainly my fault..... This guy is NOT Captain Justice. He can't fool me. He's a liar and a pretender. EnergyGrrl was right....	Effective immediately you're in charge of all Defender's League Space Ops. It's long overdue. I'll go gather the team now and announce it to them.	You may now go have a good cry and question your previously held perceptions of me about me. I would die for you....

3459. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"

by Ranger77 on February 8, 2005
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille" by Ranger77 2-08-05
*sigh* Did you tell him all of us think he blows as a leader?	Yep. It was sad. He kinda got this look on his face and said he need to spend some time at the "Fortress". Fortress? Like Superman's Fortress of Solitude? Didn't know he had one....	Welcome to Fortress Burger. May I help... A Quad cheeseburger with no pickles, an order of "Two Ton Fries of Fun" and a A Large Vanilla shake with a Very Berry chaser and keep 'em coming.

3460. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"

by Ranger77 on December 19, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!" by Ranger77 12-19-04
I really appreciate the Father's offer to join the Inter-Faith Council. He IS rather fond of you and your brother but he is a bit concerned about rumors he's heard regarding "get rich quick schemes".	Ah. Yes. Um....yeah.	How's the bingo take lately? A bit down due to the holidays. We're looking forward to "Vegas Night" and the Texas Hold-Em competition in January though.

3461. Ranger's World presents: "Yep, It's True!"

by Ranger77 on November 2, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "Yep, It's True!" by Ranger77 11-02-04
No election problems? Well.... You're not supposed to be here! You are unfair influence go away!	You go away! You now go away!	I kinda arranged a confrontation between a GOP voter challenger and an International Observer. Nice. $20 says the foreigner swings first....

3462. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"

by Ranger77 on September 1, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!" by Ranger77 9-01-04
Bush sucks! People are dying and we still haven't found those WMDs. This is all over oil and the only the rich are getting paid. Vote Kerry in November, man. Kerry for the future!	You can't believe anything that the Dems are saying. What DOES Kery believe in anyway? He's weak. The left is in disarray from that whole "progressive" thing to having Rev Al speak....Bush/Cheney 04!	Who are you voting for anyway? Dr. Quinn from Sealab. I thought about Spongebob Squarepants, but that would just be needlessly sarcastic.

3463. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"

by Ranger77 on August 6, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille" by Ranger77 8-06-04
Our fearless leader wants me to go to Anger Management classes. Can you believe it? Actually I can. You're lucky. To calm my alleged "sociopathic tendancies" he makes me live in this silly holographic happy room.	So what do I do, CatLass? Help me out here. Well, I have to admit, my tactics tend to be a bit extreme but ....	I heard you confronted Reaper with his "anger issues" yesterday. Do you really think therapy is a good idea? I tried to bring the subject up again and he spit up a hairball, threw a handful litter at me and threatened to urinate in a heating duct. I think I MIGHT be pushing him too hard.

3464. Ranger's World

by Ranger77 on July 29, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World by Ranger77 7-29-04
Britney doesn't like me? My wife is a bit sensitive to things like boob size estimation, tales of sexual conquests, farting, burping....you get the idea.	Biel, I never meant to offend her. I thought she liked my outgoing personality. Well, we can change that. Just cut back a bit on the bravado, ok?	I suppose telling her about that "art" flick I directed in college and you starred in as 'Phil McCavity' is out. You would be correct in assuming that.

3465. Ranger's World

by Ranger77 on July 26, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World by Ranger77 7-26-04
Marital conflict time! Grrr....! Come on. He's not that bad.	He's a tactless, classless, tasteless excuse for a person. He's also one of my best friends. He's only staying for a few days.	If he starts talking about all the "tail he's tapped" since his divorce I'll scream. I swear. If he does, I promise I'll talk about the virtues of tapping the same tail year after year.

3466. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"

by Ranger77 on June 20, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!" by Ranger77 6-20-04
You Shaolin bastard. Now look what you've done. You challenged me to blow your mind. I did. It's as simple as that.	Well at least nothing you can say now will be able to affect .... Three words: Low. Carb. Donuts.	I hate you. I was going to say "Iraqi Sovereignty", but that just would have been sadistic on my part. And...its only two words.

3467. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"

by Ranger77 on May 9, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!" by Ranger77 5-09-04
That ends the lesson for today. And remember, the flames you ignite today, leave the ashes of tommorrow. Wow. I will....and thanks.	Just made us another $50, Being close to a college really is helping the "Spritual Consulting" business. Sure is. That was a pretty deep quote too. I'm impressed.	Yeah, well someone called me on "The world don't move to the beat of just one drum" last week. Give it another ten years and 80's sitcom references will be fair game. I just used a few 'Sanford and Son' quotes yesterday, myself.

3468. Ranger's World (A "Yep, It's True..." crossover!)

by Ranger77 on May 5, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World (A "Yep, It's True..." crossover!) by Ranger77 5-05-04
Believe it or not, Bick is still running for President.... Since you're now running as an Independent, I just had a great idea to get your name out there. Ok. Just hurry up and tell me. Me and my EverQuest clan plan to troll some Final Fantasy message boards tonight.	(AP May 5, 2004 via Yahoo) Oookay....This summer, Spiderman 2 ads will be displayed on bases during 15 Major League Baseball games. It's a brilliant marketing move. Go on....	I propose we put your campaign ads on toilet sets in every GameWorks, Dave and Busters, and Taco Bell throughout the country. There's something really wrong with that, but what the hell. Make it so!

3469. True Tales of Job Interviews (8)

by choadwarrior on April 25, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

True Tales of Job Interviews (8) by choadwarrior 4-25-04
Why do you want this promotion?	I hope some day to buy new trousers.	Actually, he had pants on in the interview...for some reason, he said that in his thank-you letter.

3470. Spam W0rld (I can tell you about a possum under a rock!)

by Ranger77 on March 5, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Spam W0rld (I can tell you about a possum under a rock!) by Ranger77 3-05-04
y purch-ase software at high c.ost? we sell chea-p fastnacht love! Dude, are you that thing going around spamming everyone? If you are, you're pretty lame.	Ummm...booo? That's weak, man. Real weak. Now, do you want to see something real scary?	Moral: Drink more Classic Coke! Aaargh! Subj: My tool streched Lisa out! Subj: Stop Smoking in 7 Days! Subj: Give her unlimited orgasms! Now stay outta my territory you wannabe wanker!

3471. Spam W0rld (No subject lines left behind!!)

by Ranger77 on February 23, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Spam W0rld (No subject lines left behind!!) by Ranger77 2-23-04
Meanwhile at the Miss Internet pagent.... So tell me Cindy you're a Helpdesk analyst from Ohio: Why should you be Miss Internet? Well, I'm good with people, I love animals and the color purple. I also have an amazing little secret.	A secret? Sounds intriguing. What is it pray tell? Well it's like this: I crave dark sausage!! Backseat Boinkers!	Ahhhh! My tongue on her....Licking for lettuce! Boat to tuna town!

3472. Ranger's World: The Lost Episodes

by Ranger77 on February 18, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World: The Lost Episodes by Ranger77 2-18-04
Last Fall, we did a bit with our corporate lawyer Biel Z. Bubb and his wife Britney. It had a overdone sitcom-like quality: the corporate lawyer, his activist wife and their relationship.	So.... let's check in and see what's up with them now. We present a very serious tale regarding an issue that affects every married couple in modern day America....	Honey, I just had a great idea. Let's go catch a movie! Shit. Here we go.

3473. Spam World (Your father was a hamster....)

by Ranger77 on February 12, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Spam World (Your father was a hamster....) by Ranger77 2-12-04
Ok, the situation is bad. I screwed up. So what now? To fight the evil spammer that was once your PC, you must transform yourself.	Transform my...HEY! Wait for it....	Oh, now this is just plain silly. Don't knock it. The suit is made out of pure Industrial Hemp. Alot of my fellow monks...ummm...worked on it.

3474. Hard sell

by boorite on February 10, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Hard sell by boorite 2-10-04
woooooo, I'm haunting you. Cunt off.	But I can never depart this mortal coil so long as-- CUNT OFF, I SAID!	--the curse of-- CUNT! OFF!

3475. Spam W0rld (Have a Coke and a smile and shut the hell up!)

by Ranger77 on February 10, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Spam W0rld (Have a Coke and a smile and shut the hell up!) by Ranger77 2-10-04
I've tried to stop him, Sensei. Eddie's rampage continues. Yes, I was afraid of that young one....	"The superhero, Captain Justice has been neutralized...." ....must find Milfs.....must enlarge manhood.... ....Now is the time to get an equity loan....!	"....and so far, I'm told he has caused over 45 sexual harassment lawsuits...." **Giant trouser worms. Where do you live?** eek!

3476. Spam W0rld (Where's the BEEF!)

by Ranger77 on February 6, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Spam W0rld (Where's the BEEF!) by Ranger77 2-06-04
There he is. Your environmental suit will protect you from his influence. I'll give it a shot. I'm confident he'll listen to reason and stop spamming everyone. We have to push for a peaceful solution.	(Yes, an actual spam subject line received this week.) - R77 I like to F*ck Da Butt!!	Didn't work huh? Nope. You'll have to fry the little bastard.

3477. Breakup 8

by ObiJo on February 3, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Breakup 8 by ObiJo 2-03-04
Hammerhead Shark, I think it's over between us.	Don't look back, Hammerhead Shark.	You don't want to be like Santa.

3478. Spam W0rld (Keep your eye-i-i-i on the Sparrow!!!)

by Ranger77 on January 31, 2004
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Spam W0rld (Keep your eye-i-i-i on the Sparrow!!!) by Ranger77 1-31-04
I screwed up didn't I? Yes. When "Eddie" was your computer even though you received spam, you had some control over him. Now he is connected directly to the Internet and mobile.	No Anti-Virus...no filtering....he would be unstoppable. Yes, I'm afraid no PC is safe from his influence now....	Great Scott.....I've been infected....! "The message contains Unicode characters and has been sent as a binary attachment." BWAH-HAHAHAHA....God you're dumb!!

3479. Swipe It Between Your Buttcheeks and Hit Enter

by attitudechicka on October 19, 2003
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Swipe It Between Your Buttcheeks and Hit Enter by attitudechicka 10-19-03
Cash or Check Only Your total is $1.06 Here, I'll just pay with my debit card.	Cash Or Check Only Our machines only accept cash or check.	Cash or Check Only Well, could you take it just this once?

3480. Ranger's World

by Ranger77 on September 30, 2003
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World by Ranger77 9-30-03
Biel endures more torment at "The Wife's friend's party....!" ....and on top of that lawyers help the rich and not the poor. You guys are just in it for the money. Really.	This whole thing about law school and ethics....let's face it lawyers are here for one thing and that's to get 'the privileged' off the hook. Guilt and innocence doesn't matter to you guys at all. I see.	Uhh...while you're here. I have this....friend....who just happened to be wrongly accused of indecent exposure. I don't suppose you could.... No.

3481. Ranger's World

by Ranger77 on September 28, 2003
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World by Ranger77 9-28-03
And so....later.... Nice VW Beetle in the driveway. Almost as impressive as the Mini Cooper next to it. Behave. These are nice people you'll see.	Yeah....I'm sure they'll just love me. Come on Biel, you're a lawyer. It's not like you're some soul sucking creature or something.	Actually.... Don't start....ok? Just Don't.

3482. Ranger's World

by Ranger77 on September 27, 2003
Rating: 7.14 (7 votes)

Ranger's World by Ranger77 9-27-03
At home with the Bubbs (Biel Z. and Britney) .... I really wanted to spend my days off around the house. That's no fun. Besides it's good for you to meet normal people for a change that don't need legal help.	But....I don't know. This party you want me to go to....I'm not going to know a single person there. I want you to meet more of my friends. They're good, open minded, clear thinking people.	And the horns and wings.... As long as you keep the eye glowing and snorting to a minimum it will be fine. You might even be a hit with the pagans.