Top Rated Comics Archive
This static page shows every comic captured in sc_toprated_comics when the archive was generated.
3251. Distractions
by choadwarrior on September 15, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
3252. CC 366: Deputy Donkey
by Rabid_Weasle on August 27, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Sir, do you realize you were dry humping in a heavy petting zone? | |
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| TELL IT TO THE JUDGE CAPONE! | |
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| This is your pal Deputy Donkey reminding you kids, just grope some titties! | |
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3253. Random Random
by ivytheplant on August 23, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| I broke into your house to steal things for crack money. | |
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| Your wife used me to act out her S&M fantasies. | |
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| Then you'd better do something about your cat. | |
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3254. A lesson learned
by JStrong on August 14, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| That's what you get for taking my lawn gonmes. | |
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3255. cc364
by mandingo on August 4, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| and then the lil sheet stab me | |
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3256. If life was like Monopoly 2
by bankerrap on July 22, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| You've just passed Go have £200 | |
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| I'm sorry but you have to pay Super Tax, that'll be £200 | |
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| What!? This is ridiculous. I'm leaving this city! | |
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| By visiting the train station you have to pay £50 | |
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3257. orphanage field trip
by mandingo on June 27, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| wow, so this is the house i was born in | |
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| yep! well, a soggy cardboard box round the side, but close enough! are you happy to finally get to see it? | |
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| and you see that patch of dirt right there? where the color doesn't quite match the dirt around it? that's where we caught your dad trying to bury you! | |
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| wowee! are those other patches my brothers and sisters? | |
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| and your mother! who really really loved you! like a whole whole lot! | |
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3258. corndog7
by mandingo on June 8, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| get over here, silly. i just Godhead you and Weng. you know i can't Godhead three times in a day! it'd be some kind of new record! | |
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3259. Roommates
by Drexle on April 16, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| So, I must admit that I am going into this ameteur porn festival with a bit of trepadation. | |
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| If it's anything like last year's it will be hilarious. | |
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| Hey wait... I know that guy on the screen. He lives down the hall from me! | |
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| I'm impressed. he seems to be handling that 10 inch monster cock rather well. | |
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| You know, it's hard to stay mad at a guy for never taking out the trash when you've just seen him take a monster cock on a big screen. | |
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3260. Stickblade Comics #1 (My Robot)
by scnbenstein on March 17, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Hey I-69... You know what I like about you the most? | |
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| No matter what I say to you, I know you'll never judge me. | |
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| Well Steve... I'm programmed not to judge people. It's not in my nature to do so. | |
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| Just between you and me... I'm 30 years old and I've never had sex before. | |
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| Are you f***ing kidding me? | |
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3261. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on February 1, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Um....Yeah. Anyway my name is Britney and I haven't had any Coca Cola in 18 hours, 13 minutes and 10 seconds. | |
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| WAY TO GO BRITNEY! WE ARE WITH YOU! | |
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| My husband thinks I may have a problem which is why I'm here. I'm willing to go to these meetings and get off Coke because I love him. | |
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| AWESOME, BRITNEY! BE STRONG, GIRL! | |
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| Also, the lack of caffeine and the fact that you people are fucking annoying is making it very hard for me not to kill everyone in this room. | |
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| THAT'S WHY WE'RE BEHIND THIS CONCRETE BARRIER, BRITNEY! WOOO! | |
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3262. at the playground: epilogue
by mandingo on January 15, 2007
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)
3263. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on January 14, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Rosie O'Donnell was hospitalized today after becoming "slightly" insane due to her inability to obtain a "chicken fat taco" from Taco Bell. She reportedly eats of them several daily. | |
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| O'Donnell is said to be addcited to this 'elite', expensive, and formerly secret food item, which is currently unavailable due to a nationwide shortage. | |
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| The shortage is blamed on an explosion at a chicken fat processing plant in Southern California. Preliminary results point to a missile hit, possibly Russian. | |
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| The Russian military said it could neither confirm or deny this but would sent T-Shirts, pens and coupons to all affected. A spokesperson for Rosie claims "sinister forces are at work".... | |
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| You know, "Sinister Forces" would be a good porn star name for you. | |
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| I can neither confirm nor deny that. | |
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3264. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on January 8, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Fearing an increase of comics with high explosive weapons, George Clooney met with the UN officials in West Palm Beach. Paris Hilton was rumored to appear. | |
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| Rosie O'Doonnel on the other hand, held a news conference in Detroit to promote the disarmament group: Comics Unilateral Nonproliferation Treaty Troopers also known as C.U.N.T.T.... | |
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| Rest assured America, I am a CUNTT. I have always been a CUNTT and I will always be a CUNTT. I doubt if anyone can be a bigger supporter of being a CUNTT than I am..... | |
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| The world WANTS, dare I say, NEEDS more CUNTTs like me! | |
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3265. How to win an argument.
by Xion on January 3, 2007
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| All I'm saying is that if there IS a God, then robots designed him, making him the ultimate AI. | |
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| And how would robots go about this, if humans designed robots. | |
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| Your a just a sore loser you little SOB. | |
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3266. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on December 15, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| I'm worried about, Chuck. | |
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| I don't know. That was a pretty serious thing he witnessed. Pretty scary. | |
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| He's a big boy. He'll get over it. | |
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| Personally I never expected Lindsey Lohan's vagina to actually look like a crushed corned beef sandwich either. It WAS rather shocking. | |
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| It was his own damn fault for getting "Crotchshot Fever" and trolling the internet for pics. He might not be able to go into a deli again but he'll be ok.... | |
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3267. Random Comic! Home for the Haughtydays
by Scyess on November 6, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Listen, Santa, the other holidays asked me to come talk to you... | |
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| And just who the hell are you? | |
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| What do you mean, who am I? You know I'm the Thanksgiving turkey! | |
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| You mean you were the Thanksgiving turkey! Now they're marketing Christmas even before Halloween! It's only a matter of time before Christmas is the ONLY holiday! So suck it, bitch! Ho ho ho! | |
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| If the world is spared even one singing animatronic, it was worth it. | |
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3268. Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
by choadwarrior on October 25, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Well, it all came down to your last putt on the 18th green for you to win your first major...what was going through your mind? | |
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| I knew it was a makeable putt, but it worried me when it hung up there on the edge of the cup for a moment. | |
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| I haven't seen so much tension waiting for a ball to drop since my son's first year. | |
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3269. Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
by choadwarrior on October 22, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| So far tonight, we've seen the most exciting hockey game of the season. | |
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| If you're going to win games, you have to put the puck in the net. | |
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| Like I always tell my wife, "I can't wait for the end of the next period." | |
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3270. Anger Management
by biped on September 29, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| What do you do when someone makes you really, really mad, Senor Alvarez? | |
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| I throw my arms in the air--like this--and scream, "I KEEL YOU!!!" | |
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| What do you do, leetle girl? | |
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| I turn into Oprah Winfrey! | |
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3271. FTC89: Energizer Bunny
by mandingo on August 14, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| hi, i'm from Where Are They Now and we'd like to tell your story! | |
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| you know - the glory years as a child drummer, your parents stealing all your money, puberty killing your fledgling acting career, your long addiction to sniffing cocaine and other rabbits' asses | |
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| you ready for a bomb? you saved my life that day. | |
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| can we turn off the cameras, please? | |
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3272. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on June 18, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Well, you look pretty chipper for someone who expected to have a miserable time. | |
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| Actually did you know Todd's favorite movie is Saw, his favorite flavor of ice cream is vanilla and he has a birthmark underneath his left nipple. | |
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| It was is in the four page tutorial they handed out while you were in the bathroom.... | |
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| Evidently most people here don't know this kid either. If you want a copy they're over by that bowl of black and white M&Ms that have the words "death" and "chaos" stamped on them.... | |
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3273. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on June 12, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| So you're stuck going to this graduation party for some kid you don't even know? Man, that sucks. | |
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| You know....you could just get blasted the day before, have this hellish hangover the next day and say you're too sick to go. | |
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| Did it. June 21st, 2003. She made me go anyway. She always hides any alcohol in the house a week before a grad party weekend. | |
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| No spicy, greasy food to eliminate any possible stomach problems and she makes me take Vitamin C the week before. I'm incredibly freakishly healthly before these stupid things.... | |
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3274. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"
by Ranger77 on December 14, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Man, what a headache. Am I still wasted? You look like a purple donkey to me. | |
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| That depends. Did you bring a dead mouse in the house and set it on my bed? | |
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| Yep. Did that. I also threw up on your pillow if I'm not mistaken. | |
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| Ok....in that case you're still wasted. You're hallucinating right now. | |
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3275. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on November 25, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Are you sure that will work? | |
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| It's always worked for me. | |
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| Stop being such a fucking sissy. | |
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| Dude, have you been talking to my Mom? | |
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3276. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on November 6, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Ah-HA! I have you now, superhero dude guy. I am Gumbol the Mighty. I have caught you by surprise and now you will feel my wrath!! | |
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| Your carelessness shall be your downfall. Prepare to experience true TERROR! Gumbol PUNCH!! | |
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| I might be wrong, but when you catch someone by surprise there usually isn't an announcement. Not a crticism, mind you....just an observation. | |
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3277. Trix Aint for Kids
by xb00042 on December 18, 2008
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| How many tricks did you turn today? And if you hand me another grain of fruity children's cereal you gettin slapped! | |
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3278. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on October 2, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| You're back! Wow you were dead for a long time huh? For us superheroes coming back is always a tricky thing. | |
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| It makes you think about what's beyond this physical world and if it's really worth the effort to come back and fight crime. | |
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| After awhile you'll make peace with yourself and your duty. While things might not be the same, life will begin to become.... | |
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| Screw all that. Who's been eating my Jolly Ranchers?! | |
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3279. Joe, the duck that says interstitial 3
by mandingo on September 5, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| i'm going off to war, Joe, but i'm scared. real scared. i could use a pep talk | |
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3280. ((based on an areallystupidguy comic))
by mandingo on August 26, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
3281. situbu.sit
by lukket on August 21, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
3282. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"
by Ranger77 on August 20, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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The show's FIRST celebrity interview continues....
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| So, as an actor, you were particularly upset about the hidden content in GTA: San Andreas. | |
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| It was troubling. Myself and alot of actors in Hollywood are trying to be socially relevant. Healing, if you will. That game was a cancer. | |
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| For example I'm currently producing a cutting edge documentary that explores sexuality in high school. I consider it giving something back to my young fanbase. | |
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| I've heard of it. Do you really think "Smack Dat Booty" is an appropriate title? | |
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| If you dont speak their language, you'll lose them my friend. | |
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3283. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"
by Ranger77 on August 19, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| We haven't had an assignment for our Internet Consultant lately so I thought I'd drop by and say hello to him. | |
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| As you can see he's a pretty busy guy. To know about the latest technology out there requires alot of work and research. | |
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| For example chatrooms and webcams that interface with remote controlled sex toys.... | |
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3284. Ranger's World presents: "It's A Monk's Life!"
by Ranger77 on July 8, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Look, you and your brother made me alot of money with that religion thing, but this.... There are too many talk shows already. | |
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| Please hold your opinions until you see this teaser preview from our demo tape. | |
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| The Secrets of Lesbian Jello Fighting REVEALED! And also, Penis Enlargement made easy and CHEAP! | |
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| All this and Uncensored Aquatic Bird Sex Tapes on the next MONK JUSTICE!! | |
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| Blackmail. Wow. That's a bit rude. | |
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| Believe it or not, we're talking about about a couple of Egrets from Philly. | |
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3285. what if anakin skywalker had become a catholic priest?
by mandingo on June 19, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| I know god exists, it's just that sometimes I don't understand why he lets bad things happen. | |
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| I find your lack of faith disturbing. | |
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| Now send me the choir younglings. There's something I must do. | |
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3286. Ranger's World presents: "Yep, It's True!"
by Ranger77 on March 26, 2005
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| The only thing I'm sure of in this Schiavo case is that her and her family are being used as political puppets. | |
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| You are SO missing the point. This is about life and how precious it is. It's no different than abortion. | |
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| I don't necessarily disagree with that, but weren't you in favor of the Iraq War? You also support the death penalty, if I recall. | |
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| You also said that "someone needs to kill that bastard" about the judge who ruled in the case. | |
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| *sigh* You just don't get it do you? Life is precious and should be protected at all costs except for foreigners, criminals, some judges and spiders. I HATE spiders.... | |
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3287. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on December 25, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Attention all Defenders League members. I'm happy to announce that OMNIBUS, our new sentient computer is online. This new addition to our team will ensure we triumph over evil. | |
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**HELLO. I AM OMNIBUS. I LOOK FOWARD TO WORKING WITH YOU.**
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| OMNUBUS performs millions of calculations per millisecond. He is hooked into every Law Enforcement database in the world. He is GPS aware and has links into the highly classified Echelon system.... | |
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***YOU ARE IN FRONT OF A WHITE HOUSE WITH A MAILBOX. THE DOORS ARE LOCKED. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?****
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| Uhhh....And he can run a session of Zork using an emulator I downloaded last night. Any questions? | |
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3288. Ranger's World
by Ranger77 on July 25, 2006
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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In the interests of "equal time," we present this discourse on gas prices.
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| You people have to understand that gas prices have to be this high. Middle East problems, the growing demand in China and other parts of the world....it's only natural. | |
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| Granted there is no REAL supply problems and even though US refineries are shutting down for "maintenance" prices are rather fair and affordable for the average consumer. | |
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| And, uh...price speculation is, uh....good. | |
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| The US economy can actually withstand even more.....ummmm... | |
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| Freedom is Slavery. War is Peace, BITCHES! | |
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| Go Orwell, go Orwell ....it's your birthday.....it's your.... | |
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3289. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"
by Ranger77 on November 10, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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The monks are off today so instead we're featuring their cats: Alexander and Hannibal!
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| I can see it in your eyes. You've been doin' the Nip again haven't you? You know you degrade us all when you take that stuff. | |
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| Aw come on....it was from Thailand. Thai Catnip! It would have been a crime not to at least try it. Now help me get to the box. This stuff makes you pee like a lynx. | |
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| Can you wait just a few minutes I got something to do outside.... | |
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| That's bullshit. I'm degrading us all and you're content licking your ass in public every 30 minutes. I'm not the one with the problem my friend.... | |
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3290. Ranger's World presents: "The Ranger Years"
by Ranger77 on October 30, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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I think I got my first real taste of corporate logic during a job I held during summer break.....
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| Ms. Carson, the tractor caught on fire. Don't worry though, I put it out with fire extinguisher. | |
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| Not the one mounted on the side, Ranger? | |
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Such exposure can be REAL devastating to a 17 year old....
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| Well, yeah. I thought that was what it was there for. | |
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Yeah, she was eventually promoted....and made the head of the OSHA committee.
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| It was a pretty big fire that flared up quickly. It was real close to the fuel depot when it did and.... | |
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| Ranger, do you realize it costs us $25 to refill that extinguisher..... | |
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3291. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"
by Ranger77 on August 14, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| I can't believe you're being so stubborn about this. It's accepted wisdom. You should embrace it and not foolishly fight it. | |
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| I know no such thing. If we close our minds to alternative ideas, then we are truly dead inside. | |
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3292. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on August 13, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Welcome to Anger Management training. It's not often we get superheroes here. I'm sure you'll do fine. | |
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| You see, the key discipline in this class is self control. Now, do you think you have ANY self control? | |
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| Well, I'm almost biting a hole through my tongue to keep from ripping your freakin' head off. | |
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| Well that's a good start.... | |
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3293. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on August 2, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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Reaper's Room. Defenders League HQ. 1700hrs. 8/2/04
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| Nice wallpaper you have here. | |
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| I think it adds a bit of character to the place. | |
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| So let's get back on the subject. WHY again would I need Anger Management classes? | |
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3294. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life!"
by Ranger77 on July 17, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Wait for it....almost.... | |
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| There you go. Mind over matter is some cool shit, huh? | |
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3295. Untitled
by batFucker on June 21, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| heheh, yeah, when i was in 7th grade, i had this girlfriend for about 2 weeks. one day, we sneak into the bathroom at school; it was the first time i ever felt a girl up man. | |
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| i had a similar experience with a girl in 6th grade. fucking feels like it was yesterday man... | |
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| guess that's largely due to the fact that it was yesterday. | |
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3296. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on May 28, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| This place is looking better. My leadership is bringing back respectability into being part of an evil organization. | |
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| Still, some might not like my approach. With the day care center, the Pasta Bar in the cafeteria, and the profit sharing plan, I could be accused of becoming too "corporate." | |
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| Which is why I had to bring in the most evil character I could find to advise me and make sure this organization stays on track.... | |
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| Iva Biggun: Lawyer, Agent and Marketing Professional at your service sir. | |
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3297. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life."
by Ranger77 on May 5, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Blah, blah, blah, fools. Blah, blah, blah, overrated. Blah, blah, blah, world be better off without them. Blah, blah, blah, bunch of stupid, mindless people. SHOULD care more about blah. | |
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| Some intolerant, arrogant, closed minded activist guy decided to bombard me with his whacked out opinions. | |
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| Really? What was he? Conservative? Liberal? | |
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| To be quite honest I really couldn't tell. | |
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3298. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on April 28, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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He was born in a top secret lab, the result of years of clandestine experimentations. It was there he developed his extraordinary abilities.
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Eventually he escaped his captors, and chose to use his powers for good. Despite this, he is still on the run....hunted by a shadowy government agency. Still, no one can deny the might of....
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| The Incredible M.O.U.S.E? | |
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| Smile when you say that, bitch. | |
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3299. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on April 25, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| I was just talking to CatLass and it was really strange. She was actually pretty nice to me. | |
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| I know, its weird. Then it was like she thought of something and had to go away to her room all of a sudden. | |
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| I hear she does that alot. She usually emerges from her room all pissy again. I wonder why? | |
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| Your Anger Index is only at 45%.....shall I continue the simulation? | |
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3300. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"
by Ranger77 on April 16, 2004
Rating: 7.22 (9 votes)
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| Before we fight, I have a confession to make. I'm not Asian. I'm from New Jersey and was granted my Ninja Skills from a mystical being who thought he was in Japan. | |
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| That's ok. My rich uncle was killed by robbers and I spent my teenage years training in the martial arts and plotting my revenge. I'm from Ohio. | |
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| And...uh...you're not Asian either. | |
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