Top Rated Comics Archive

This static page shows every comic captured in sc_toprated_comics when the archive was generated.

3001. Ranger's World presents: "Yep, It's True!"

by Ranger77 on July 28, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "Yep, It's True!" by Ranger77 7-28-04
You know Stan, here at Yahoo News you will be required to look over AP and Reuters newsfeeds and determine which headlines should be placed on our portal page. This is an honor sir!	Now keep in mind, they must be the most interesting, thought provoking and informative news stories. Resist the temptation for fluff. Understood. I won't let you down.	Yahoo 7/27/04 Did you read Yahoo today!! Japanese researchers have discovered that women who eat more than two eggs a day could die!! Dude that's nothing. I just read on Yahoo that they just cancelled Ryan Seacrest's talk show. Bastards....

3002. Untitled

by batFucker on June 19, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Untitled by batFucker 6-19-04
i met this girl the other day. man, it was really special.	she's got the cutest face, and she's fucking hot. i talked to her for a bit, and she was nice. she was funny, sweet, and smart. too smart for me though, really.	i mean, when i offered her the candy to try to coax her into my car, she fucking started running and screaming.

3003. Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life."

by Ranger77 on April 9, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "It's a Monk's Life." by Ranger77 4-09-04
That Monk must be meditating....	The concentration, the absolute control over his body. It must be nice to have that much self discipline. I wish I could be like that.	Yep, I was right. That woman playing frisbee isn't wearing a bra.... Hey what are you looking at.....ohhhh. You dirty bugger. *heh heh*

3004. Spam W0rld (Charlie Murphy! *slap*)

by Ranger77 on March 8, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Spam W0rld (Charlie Murphy! *slap*) by Ranger77 3-08-04
For weeks he's been training, mastering the dark art of Spam Fu to stop Eddie his former friend, now a spamming ghost terrorist.	Subj: I lost my V.irginity last night.....Super Deep inspections....In the backdoor.	It's time. Do you have a small p.enis? BWAH-HA-HAHAHAHA!

3005. Ranger's World: The Lost Episodes

by Ranger77 on March 5, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Ranger's World: The Lost Episodes by Ranger77 3-05-04
Movietime! (maybe...) Ok, this one is about three generations of women who... No. How about this an ex-cop and a beautiful....	Nope. You have to like this....set in the 1800's this film examines.... Are you kidding? This sounds cool...supernatural creatures with hi-tech weapons must fight for....	Hold on. That sounds like one of your family reunions. Ooh....Now that was below the belt.

3006. Spam W0rld (....and your mother smells of elderberries!)

by Ranger77 on February 19, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Spam W0rld (....and your mother smells of elderberries!) by Ranger77 2-19-04
The art of Spam-Fu is based on "out-weirding" the other guy. They throw a subject line at you, you respond with an even more vulgar, weird or funny one. Got it? Good. Let's practice. I'm ready.	Subj: funbags, melons, knockers -- boobyzone.com Uhh....buy this....uhh....thing I have for sale?	You're kidding, right? Buy this SEXY thing I have for sale?

3007. Spam W0rld (Just want you in my Caddy!!)

by Ranger77 on January 29, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Spam W0rld (Just want you in my Caddy!!) by Ranger77 1-29-04
I finally did it sensei. I killed my PC out of mercy. I will now hunt spammers. Ah yes, young one. But did you rip out its processor and bury it separately to honor the time it was online without spam?	Well...no. Is that important?	HERBAL VIAGRA! MILFS! REFINANCE NOW, BITCHES!!

3008. Spam W0rld (....its not small! NoNoNo!)

by Ranger77 on January 27, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Spam W0rld (....its not small! NoNoNo!) by Ranger77 1-27-04
I'm sorry Eddie. I had to destroy you. The Spamming was just too much. And too weird.	I will avenge you by taking my fight to the spammers. Adios. Rest In Peace.	How silkysmooth can her skin be? See Farm Girls Get Nasty! I like enormous schlong!!

3009. Spam W0rld (It takes a village!)

by Ranger77 on January 3, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Spam W0rld (It takes a village!) by Ranger77 1-03-04
Bill recieved 245 emails TODAY. And now here's Bill with the local news!	244 were spam. The remaining one was a warning from Hotmail that he was over his storage quota. are you still single? are you well endowed? , these insane twins want your body!	Bill is quite mad. Uh....we, um, seem to be having some technical problems.... Watch Paris Get Slammed. Splooge on her face. call me!

3010. Spam W0rld (As seen on TV!)

by Ranger77 on December 6, 2003
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Spam W0rld (As seen on TV!) by Ranger77 12-06-03
Sometimes professional help is needed in the war on Spam! Hello, my name is Eddie and I'm addicted to Spam! Hello Eddie!!	I guess I hit rock bottom when I started doing all the Paris Hilton mailings. I just can't help it.	pårîs(FRÉÉ)Híltoñ¦ ....Dammit, there I go again. One day at a time my friend. One day at a time.

3011. Spam W0rld (Ripped from today's subject lines!)

by Ranger77 on November 7, 2003
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Spam W0rld (Ripped from today's subject lines!) by Ranger77 11-07-03
Spam has a language all its own.... Your .EU Domain is for sale vexgffate ob... Is MS returning to fat-client lock-in?; ...	Finally, Completely Free Health Insurance! tap into our lending networklow rates	*sigh* *sigh*

3012. D&G Presents: Spam W0rld (Ripped from today's subject lines)

by Ranger77 on October 31, 2003
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

D&G Presents: Spam W0rld (Ripped from today's subject lines) by Ranger77 10-31-03
In space....no one can hear you spam.... What's your pleasure today? Chubby girls are eaisier to please.	This is not sunday school uojwqidl ldxpgbc. Trailer park booty!	Blind Date Invitation ! regio... Date Beautiful Women! me, and ...

3013. Obi Returns - I

by gabe_billings on May 20, 2003
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Obi Returns - I by gabe_billings 5-20-03
Obi, you cocksmoking assbag. Where the fuck were you this time? Ah, I got this job at JPL. We were working with some guys at Nasa on this new Mars probe.	No shit? Yeah, Top Secret stuff. Very hush-hush.	Brrriiiiingggg! Say, isn't that your phone? Eh, let the answering machine get it.

3014. Happy World Cup!

by kaufman on May 31, 2002
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

Happy World Cup! by kaufman 5-31-02
All right, men, this is what we've been playing for. We'll start with this formation: five defenders, four midfielders, one center.	But coach: that means we'll have ... zero wings!	All your base are belong to us.

3015. 69

by maxawa on March 11, 2002
Rating: 7.5 (6 votes)

69 by maxawa 3-11-02
Hot Dogs, get your hot dogs! Hey, buddy, wanna hot dog? No thanks, I'm Jewish.	A 21st century jew? Get hip, man. Have you not heard the word of Jesus? He speaks of love, and compassion, and forgiveness. With Jesus you will know everlasting life. With Jesus you will know pork. I'm proud to be Jewish, pal. My people have more guts than anyone on earth. When my granddad left Auschwitz, he weighed just eight pounds. My grandma? Three.	Pork. An interesting counterpoint.

3016. God: Year One

by squidrabies on September 14, 2005
Rating: 7.44 (45 votes)

God: Year One by squidrabies 9-14-05
I'll call you Adam.	This paradise shall be your home. But know this... never partake of the forbidden--	You know what? Let's lose the suit. I think it's too soon to let you pick out your own clothes. Aw man!

3017. Stop Me If You've Heard This One...

by BigEvilDan on April 23, 2005
Rating: 7.44 (45 votes)

Stop Me If You've Heard This One... by BigEvilDan 4-23-05
		I thought I told you guys never to come back. Every time you walk in here, something goes down.

3018. and now the bad...

by mandingo on October 25, 2005
Rating: 7.44 (41 votes)

and now the bad... by mandingo 10-25-05
you must be the babysitter. i've gotta warn you, my 4 kids are a handfull. i charge $10 a kid	later... so how'd it go? well, i have good news and bad news	good news first you only owe me 20 dollars

3019. The 99 Cent Store

by choadwarrior on June 26, 2004
Rating: 7.43 (35 votes)

The 99 Cent Store by choadwarrior 6-26-04
Excuse me, where can I find the crackers in this store?	Aisle 12.	No, I mean the people like me.

3020. Tard Boy and Finkelman

by squidrabies on August 31, 2002
Rating: 7.43 (35 votes)

Tard Boy and Finkelman by squidrabies 8-31-02
Sometimes after work, I like to take a nice soothing bath, have a cold glass of wine and listen to the soothing sounds of dying animals. Yeah, I take my shoes off and... Wait, dying animals?	And bath salts. I couldn't live without my bath salts. Is it a recording of the sound of dying animals, or are animals actually dying right there in your apartment?	Come on man, a recording can't capture the raw beauty of the final gurgling breath of a living creature. Damn, I was gonna ask to borrow the tape.

3021. Astro-Monkey

by FinnNYC on February 17, 2004
Rating: 7.42 (33 votes)

Astro-Monkey by FinnNYC 2-17-04
How'd it go? Not so bad but this suit reeks like burnt hair.	So take it off. Can't just yet. They said they're gonna try again with more fuel.	have you learned the sign for "extinguish me" yet? I really only remember the banana ones.

3022. Communication Or Lack Thereof: Jan.23.2004

by Gagra on January 22, 2004
Rating: 7.42 (33 votes)

Communication Or Lack Thereof: Jan.23.2004 by Gagra 1-22-04
Girls say they have all the pressure to look a certain way... Wow Karen looks really good today. Mike is kinda cute...but really skinny.	Even with her flaws, she's still perfect to me. And what is the deal with those polka dots? I mean come on.	...but who are we kidding? She's smart, funny, caring...I'm going to ask her out. Mike's funny, smart, and caring...I need to find me a big bad jackass.

3023. Father O'Mallard's Twin Brother

by biped on September 19, 2005
Rating: 7.42 (31 votes)

Father O'Mallard's Twin Brother by biped 9-19-05
Travis, I wish you wouldn't borrow my clothes while you're visiting for the weekend. Hey, bro -- it was YOUR dog that pissed in my suitcase, remember?	Excuse me...I'm very troubled... would you please hear my confession? Huh? Sure!	WHOA!!! You SUCKED his COCK? On a fucking FERRIS WHEEL? AWESOME!!!

3024. Cheerful

by DexX on August 29, 2005
Rating: 7.42 (31 votes)

Cheerful by DexX 8-29-05
Life sucks. My job trailed off to nothing with no warning, I had to turn down a new job last week because the hours sucked, and I haven't had a call back for a week! Don't worry about it. The best things always turn up when you least expect it.		No, you're thinking of cancer.

3025. Hooray, there's a new Scott Peterson!

by suicide_king on February 23, 2005
Rating: 7.42 (31 votes)

Hooray, there's a new Scott Peterson! by suicide_king 2-23-05
First that monster killed his wife and baby Conner. Now a guy in Texas kills his pregnant ex and young Jayden.	What is the world coming to? Yeah, parents really need to stop coming up with these stupid ass kid names.	Exactly -- Dakota Fanning better watch her ass.

3026. Battle Royale

by BigEvilDan on August 22, 2003
Rating: 7.42 (31 votes)

Battle Royale by BigEvilDan 8-22-03
Hey, who are you? I am Cthulhu. I have risen from the darkest depths of the earth to devour your soul.	*CHOMP*	Sigh. His soul is going straight to my thighs.

3027. Tard Boy and Finkelman

by squidrabies on October 1, 2002
Rating: 7.42 (31 votes)

Tard Boy and Finkelman by squidrabies 10-01-02
Dude! I got the raddest new game for my Ultra-Super-Color-Game-o-Tron!! AWESOME! What is it?!	Death Mutant Robo Machine Epic XXII Radical! I heard when you beat the game, the cartidge explodes and you actually DIE!	Yeah, my stupid neighbor Ricky beat it yesterday. They're still cleaning him out of the carpet. Let's go play, I know the cheat codes!

3028. Tard Boy and Finkelman

by squidrabies on August 7, 2002
Rating: 7.42 (31 votes)

Tard Boy and Finkelman by squidrabies 8-07-02
I am so much cooler than you. It's my secret shame.		Was that sarcasm? I'm not sure.

3029. New comic

by Humpenstein on September 18, 2006
Rating: 7.41 (29 votes)

New comic by Humpenstein 9-18-06
I was in class today.	The girl next to me wrote "Do you want me?" on my paper.	I wrote "Do you want AIDS" on hers.

3030. Zathura

by Hari_Nezumi on November 18, 2005
Rating: 7.41 (29 votes)

Zathura by Hari_Nezumi 11-18-05
I...I think we're in outer space...I'll check...	AAAAAAAGH!!!

3031. Tard Boy and Finkelman

by squidrabies on August 12, 2005
Rating: 7.41 (29 votes)

Tard Boy and Finkelman by squidrabies 8-12-05
Mission control, do you read me. Come in, mission control, over.	Mission control, I'm being attacked by hostile aliens. Please advise, over.	You know, mission control, we're going to be here together for a few years so you might as well play along. Over. This is mission control. Leave me alone or I'll stab you. Over.