Top Rated Comics Archive

This static page shows every comic captured in sc_toprated_comics when the archive was generated.

1501. Awkward Interview

by Neo11 on March 3, 2010
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Awkward Interview by Neo11 3-03-10
So, how do you make a living out here on the streets?	I sell drugs to men with small penises to make them feel better Wow, you can just tell by looking at different men?	Yup-and from the looks of it, you could use a LOT of these drugs! I think we are through here

1502. Cheater

by Neo11 on March 1, 2010
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Cheater

You cheated on me?! Well, I should just rip out your heart and stomp on it!!! I'd like to see that

by Neo11, 3-01-10

1503. btw, lol!

by four_legged_tripod on February 5, 2010
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

btw, lol! by four_legged_tripod 2-05-10
OMG! That test was so ez that I'm not even gonna study 2nite for 2mor's test. First off, just say "oh my god." It's the same amount of syllables as OMG. Secondly, don't think that I can't read over your head and see your misspelled words.	Look man, that's just the way ppl do it now. Keeps everything short so you can do more in the day. What are you doing besides jerking off? This is just an excuse so you don't have to learn how to spell.	Get out of the stone age man! Fine. How about I start with F.U.?

1504. Down the Rabbit Hole

by four_legged_tripod on January 4, 2010
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Down the Rabbit Hole by four_legged_tripod 1-04-10
Awww. Look at the little bunny all alone in the wild. Wouldn't you like to come home with me?	Come here dammit! I won't hurt you. Where are you going? No! Wait, don't go there!	You look horrible sweetie. What happened? I got a wild hare up my ass.

1505. Last Panel First

by four_legged_tripod on December 21, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Last Panel First

What kind of dumb ass photocopies his butt?

by four_legged_tripod, 12-21-09

1506. Messin' with Backgrounds III

by four_legged_tripod on December 17, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Messin' with Backgrounds III by four_legged_tripod 12-17-09
	Why would you turn your relaxation and masturbation pool into a fish tank? I like the company of the fish. They're very friendly. It feels good when they swim up against my nads.	Dude, the next time he shits in the tank, I'm gonna bite his worm. I swear to God!

1507. Manual Labor

by four_legged_tripod on December 11, 2009
Rating: 8.33 (6 votes)

Manual Labor by four_legged_tripod 12-11-09
Almost done boss. I think this is as close as I can get it. Well stop anyway. It's time for lunch.		Hey! Why the hell did you stop jerking me off?

1508. I Play One on TV

by four_legged_tripod on December 4, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

I Play One on TV by four_legged_tripod 12-04-09
Almost. Almost. There it is!	Thanks again for delivering my baby doctor. Uh, yeah, sure. Don't mention it. Hey, look I gotta go. Good luck with everything.	Ok. Time to deliver your baby. What?

1509. We put the dick-shaped rock formation in Carlsbad

by LuckyGuess on October 20, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

We put the dick-shaped rock formation in Carlsbad by LuckyGuess 10-20-09
Wow, dad! I didn't know there was a hot dog stand so deep underground. It's pretty great, isn't it? You can have anything you want.	Wow, anything? Anything. Whatever you get is basically your bar mitzvah, because my meth overhead is getting pretty intense these days and I don't want to see your grandmother.	That bison dog looks pretty good.

1510. Real Life: Relationships

by four_legged_tripod on October 13, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Real Life: Relationships by four_legged_tripod 10-13-09
Relationships are about give and take and all you do is take! All I do is take... Take your shit!!!	Now man, Ima let you finish- but Chris Brown had one of the best arguments of all time.	If Chris had beaten Rihanna with an umbrella, now THAT would have been classic! Kanye West is an asshole.

1511. CC434: The perils of sea travel

by evil_d on October 1, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

CC434: The perils of sea travel by evil_d 10-01-09
I will make a meal of your mind. We be pirates, matey. Ye'll not find enough brains fer a soup 'twixt the whole crew.	Then I will require a sacrifice of fourteen of your comeliest virgins. After six months at sea, ye'll not likely find any o' them aboard either.	Fine... what can you do for me? I kin validate yer dockin' ticket.

1512. The Bad Pun Buccaneers

by DrMorton on September 23, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

The Bad Pun Buccaneers by DrMorton 9-23-09
I´m really glad our union fought for that new Clown Payment Law.	Now we´re getting paid extra for each pie in the face.	So what was your pie-rate today?

1513. They Were Having A Titanic Sized Sale

by four_legged_tripod on September 23, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

They Were Having A Titanic Sized Sale by four_legged_tripod 9-23-09
Jack, my heart will go on and on. And his hard on will go on and on since you showed him your tits!!!	I will always love you! And Jack would love a blow job but you wouldn't give him one you frigid bitch!!!	Mommy! Daddy bought another movie at the flea market!

1514. The Hazards of Religious Analogies

by Hari_Nezumi on August 14, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

The Hazards of Religious Analogies by Hari_Nezumi 8-14-09
Let me tell you what, eating one of these burgers is about as close as you're going to come to kissing God. You're a dick.	Oh come on, don't tell me that offended you. You knew I didn't have a chance, even before we went out, didn't you?	So we should do this again some time. Um, well, I don't know, I'm pretty busy with work and stuff...you know what? I'll call you.

1515. Yeah, but you're gay for liking it.

by Steamrabbit on July 24, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Yeah, but you're gay for liking it. by Steamrabbit 7-24-09
	Don't worry so much. It isn't gay, since I beat you up afterwards.

1516. Shake Your Groove Thing

by four_legged_tripod on July 18, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Shake Your Groove Thing by four_legged_tripod 7-18-09
♫ Hush girl ... Shut your lips	Do the Helen Keller and talk with your hips ♫	♫ I said hush girl ... Helen! That's the emergency exit! The dance floor's back this way! WHAAAAA WHUUUU! WHAAAAA WHUUUU!

1517. Real Life: Wipe Out

by four_legged_tripod on July 16, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Real Life: Wipe Out by four_legged_tripod 7-16-09
Do you see what Kevin did all over the rug? What is that? Chocolate pudding?	Don't taste that! It's not what you -- Aw, sick! He wiped his shit all over the rug?	The boy is 12 years old. Where would he get such an idea? Hey man, I can't help it if you ran out of toilet paper last week.

1518. Simian Says: Come to Jesus

by four_legged_tripod on June 24, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Simian Says: Come to Jesus by four_legged_tripod 6-24-09
Oh wow! There's no way I'm in heaven.	After everything I did and to all of those I did it to, why would they let me up here?	You're up here cuz I'm punishing Satan. He really wanted to party with you.

1519. Simian Says: Going Towards the Light

by four_legged_tripod on June 24, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Simian Says: Going Towards the Light by four_legged_tripod 6-24-09
beep...beep...beep...beep...beep... They say when you're about to die, your life flashes before your eyes.	beep...beep...beep...beep...beep... I see drunken orgies, hookers, bondage whips, older women, younger kids, latex gloves and a horse named Charlie.	beep...beep...beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep And that was just last Thursday ...

1520. Simian Says: 47 Hours Later

by four_legged_tripod on June 24, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Simian Says: 47 Hours Later by four_legged_tripod 6-24-09
47 hours later ... So I've been up for 47 hours calling anyone and everyone I could think of and you're the last on the list. They say if you start antibiotics soon, you'll be okay.	Oh monkey, I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do?	Just in case I'm around a little while longer, could you call Make-A-Wish and see if I could get some high class strippers up in here?

1521. Real Life: Theology

by four_legged_tripod on June 25, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Real Life: Theology by four_legged_tripod 6-25-09
Hey dad, how did the egg hunt become a part of Easter?	One week after the crucifixion... Didn't you hear me? I said Jesus has come back! Quick, hide the eggs woman! Hide the eggs!	Yeah. And that story can be found in the Gospel According to Bull Crap, right?

1522. Simian Says: Confessions of a Dangerous Mind

by four_legged_tripod on June 22, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Simian Says: Confessions of a Dangerous Mind by four_legged_tripod 6-22-09
I have a confession to make. I really wasn't that stoned.	I just pretended to be so that you would think I was easier to seduce and then try to sleep with me.	You realize that all you had to do was show up naked, right?

1523. Simian Says: Chore Chart

by four_legged_tripod on June 19, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Simian Says: Chore Chart by four_legged_tripod 6-19-09
Hey monkey. Mom wants to see you in the kitchen.	Now I really don't mind if you stay with us for a while. But while you're here you need to help around the house. I could toss your salad.	We're not having salad for dinner. What's that have to do with anything?

1524. Simian Says: Let's Meet at the Park

by four_legged_tripod on June 19, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Simian Says: Let's Meet at the Park by four_legged_tripod 6-19-09
Well, there goes another kid and home I was using. Oh well, the good thing is that most kids find monkeys cute and I should be able to find another one soon. Sweet! It's a monkey! Hey monkey, want to go to my house and play?	Sure, but answer two questions first. Number one, does your dad live at home, and number two, which one of these women is your mom. Mommy says daddy is away on a trip which is code for prison. And my mom is the one over there. Hey mom, come and meet my new monkey!	Awwww. Who's a cute monkey? You are. Yes you are. Oh dear God in heaven! Must resist urge to suckle breasts, must resist urge to suckle breasts, must resist urge to ...

1525. Simian Says: Turn the Tables

by four_legged_tripod on June 18, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Simian Says: Turn the Tables by four_legged_tripod 6-18-09
What the hell is wrong with your sister? I know nuns are trusting but the dude's a 40 year old man in a bunny suit! You don't let those kind of people inside your home! What do mean "nun"? My sister's not a nun. She just wore an old Halloween costume to teach you a lesson.	Seriously? Well, it looks like it's time to get this monkey off my back. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! What was that? Did you hurt yourself?	Sorry. I've been watching a lot of CSI: Miami lately.

1526. Steve and Steve

by HCRoyall on June 10, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Steve and Steve by HCRoyall 6-10-09
You know that old 80's song One Night in Bangkok? Yeah, what about it?	Well, in light of recent news I've been thinking about the line of the song that goes "can't be too careful with your company..." Way to make a joke about David Carradine dying, you insensitive jerk.	Way to turn my herpes into a joke about David Carradine.

1527. Cultivation

by Aylear on March 21, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Cultivation by Aylear 3-21-09
Pnakotic Manuscripts... Works of the Mentat... Junior Woodchucks Guidebook... A Treatise on the Binomial Theorem... Al Azif... Book of Mazarbul... Ellipses and How to Avoid Their Overuse...	Score! The Big Bang Theory: A Personal View by Eccentrica Gallumbits, The Triple-Breasted Whore of     Eroticon Six!	So, what did        you find?        The demise of respect and tolerance for fellow human beings.

1528. WW72: Flowers and Pretty Butterflies

by fpd on March 14, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

WW72: Flowers and Pretty Butterflies by fpd 3-14-09
OMG! That bastard fed the girl he kidnapped to his dogs! Tastes like chicken.	You monster! How could you do this!? Well, you see, Rorschach, I wanted to get your attention to, um, ask you, Would you marry me?	Dammit! Now it's going to be a hate crime when I give you the justice you deserve! Hate crime? Justice? Those are euphemisms for sex, right?

1529. Gimmie That

by DragonXero on February 24, 2009
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Gimmie That by DragonXero 2-24-09
If you don't kill me, I'm gonna have to kill you... Dude, I love that song.	What song? Wait what are yo-	Oh right. The Type-O song. AAAAAAAAAAHHH!

1530. #25 - Nuke'em

by SirBelfin on November 8, 2008
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

#25 - Nuke'em by SirBelfin 11-08-08
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT NUCLEAR WAR SIR BELFIN i have seen no evidence that proves that nuclear weapons even exist	SO YOUR SAYING THAT THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS NUCLEAR WAR yes	And then the Earth exploded

1531. Omen Polansky

by seanator on August 12, 2008
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

Omen Polansky by seanator 8-12-08
One fine day... Someone put "Because of Winn Dixie" on hold at the library That's odd	Here's the kicker, her name was "Sharon Tate" Is this evidence that she's alive?	No, It's evidence that she's in hell

1532. The Final Pitch

by umfumdisi on June 23, 2008
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

The Final Pitch by umfumdisi 6-23-08
So little strength ... life nearly gone.	If not for these nails, I'd have fallen long ago.	You heard it yourself folks! Hoffmann Nails -- crucifixion strong!

1533. The Adventures of Christopherseven when he was Stupid 19

by christopher7murphy on June 12, 2008
Rating: 8 (5 votes)

The Adventures of Christopherseven when he was Stupid 19 by christopher7murphy 6-12-08
I'm so tired. I can't sleep at night because I keep imagining that clown knocking on my door. This morning, the door knob on my back door was pulled off.	I have to sneak out of my own apartment. And now he's waiting for me when I go home.	Can I sleep at your place? Nice try Romeo!