Top Rated Comics Archive

This static page shows every comic captured in sc_toprated_comics when the archive was generated.

1201. Cat football

by mandingo on October 19, 2005
Rating: 8.1 (21 votes)

Cat football by mandingo 10-19-05
here's the punt!	it's a good one!	caught at the 10 yard line! out of the way fuckers!

1202. Smashing Pumpkins

by suicide_king on October 11, 2005
Rating: 8.1 (21 votes)

Smashing Pumpkins by suicide_king 10-11-05
Ahh, I love Halloween. A cool late October breeze in the air.	Excited children collecting treats in the neighborhood.	The registered sex offender skull fucking my eye hole.

1203. Dogmatic.

by theburninator on July 4, 2003
Rating: 8.1 (21 votes)

Dogmatic. by theburninator 7-04-03
Christianity at a glance. It is the Will of God. God is infallible.	Islam at a glance. It is the Will of Allah. Allah is infallible.	Atheism at a glance. I think I'll go buy a pizza.

1204. A Day in the Life...

by israphael on July 4, 2002
Rating: 8.1 (21 votes)

A Day in the Life... by israphael 7-04-02
Today's Agenda: Wake Up, Eat Breakfast, Go Outside, Lay out in the Sun, Nap, Wake Up, Claw the Sofa, Pee on the Bookshelf, Nap...	Wake Up, Rub Up Against the Woman Who Feeds Me, Eat Lunch, Nap, Wake Up, Play with a Crumbled Ball of Foil, Take a Dump on the Rug, Nap...	Wake Up, Eat Dinner, Go Outside, Mark My Territory, Try to Get Some Tail, Come Back Home, Have a Snack, Play with the Cat, Get Ready for Bed

1205. This Old Desert Isle.

by WillZone on September 4, 2005
Rating: 8.09 (55 votes)

This Old Desert Isle. by WillZone 9-04-05
On a Deserted Island...		I should have built a boat.

1206. Excuses Excuses

by TheGovernor on April 25, 2007
Rating: 8.09 (34 votes)

Excuses Excuses by TheGovernor 4-25-07
Lost watch? Lost watch.	*Censored*

1207. Pacman

by Injokester on May 6, 2005
Rating: 8.08 (60 votes)

Pacman

So you replaced all those stupid dot things with Ex-Lax? Sure did. This is going to be HILARIOUS!

by Injokester, 5-06-05

1208. A Brush with the Upper Lower Middle Class

by Bull_Moose on January 11, 2009
Rating: 8.08 (26 votes)

A Brush with the Upper Lower Middle Class by Bull_Moose 1-11-09
Hey, Mr. Bigshot. Do you think you're better than me because you have a wall full of diplomas? No.	Well... I mean that's not the main reason I think I'm better than you.	But it doesn't hurt.

1209. Foot in your mouth, make that 3ft.

by Pudge on January 3, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (26 votes)

Foot in your mouth, make that 3ft. by Pudge 1-03-08
Hey Bill, how many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb? Hahahaha I don't know, like 5 standing on each others shoulders.	Dammit Bill what the hell is wrong with you. It only takes one, o.k., they are not disabled people. No yeah I know that....I just thought it was a joke and...	A joke. You think that because they have a genetic condition its ok to make fun of them. I think you owe them an apology, starting with Peter. Sorry Peter.

1210. two words

by mandingo on August 22, 2007
Rating: 8.08 (26 votes)

two words by mandingo 8-22-07
i've caught the bus with this same guy for 10 years and we've never said more than two words to each other	6 years earlier... FUCK ME! CAN DO!

1211. Work / Life Balance

by Scyess on December 8, 2006
Rating: 8.08 (26 votes)

Work / Life Balance by Scyess 12-08-06
What a day! You won't believe what I went through at work today! You had to eat an entire cheesecake without using your hands?	That's stupid. Who would do that? That's what I did today.	There are no words to describe how much I'm hating you right now. Maybe with a bigger vocabulary you'd do better at work.

1212. Cold-Hearted Santa

by boloboffin on May 27, 2006
Rating: 8.08 (26 votes)

Cold-Hearted Santa by boloboffin 5-27-06
Santa, Santa! We got our first letter of the year! Jee-zus Christ! We haven't even finished cleaning up from 2005! Put whoever this asshole is on the coal and switches list with extreme prejudice!	Dear Santa: I'm 4 years old. I want you to make my daddy well again so my mommy will stop crying. Lisa.	Alright, alright. Put her down for a black dress.

1213. God Hates Lincoln

by four_legged_tripod on July 30, 2012
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

God Hates Lincoln by four_legged_tripod 7-30-12
Ha! I've done it! I've brought Abraham Lincoln back to life! What year is it?	To be precise, it's July 19th, 2012. Wow.	So is there anything you would like to do? Well, the midnight screening of Batman sounds like fun.

1214. In hindsight, it was probably a bad time to ask

by HCRoyall on June 4, 2011
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

In hindsight, it was probably a bad time to ask

Marry you? Seriously?

by HCRoyall, 6-04-11

1215. The Clown Class

by ZMannZilla on August 6, 2010
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

The Clown Class by ZMannZilla 8-06-10
Actually sir, "Pi R Squared" is an equation used to measure the area of a circle. It has virtually nothing to do with "pie" the dessert, except as a homonym.		Michael, please. We have a lot of material to cover before the final, so kindly knock it off with the "Class Straight Man" routine.

1216. Real Life: Four Legged Tripod

by four_legged_tripod on July 17, 2009
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Real Life: Four Legged Tripod by four_legged_tripod 7-17-09
Why is our dog named "Tripod"? What do you mean?	He has four legs. Only three-legged dogs are named "Tripod". Oh, that.	You've seen how your mother drives. It's only a matter of time.

1217. Another Real Life Situation: 24

by MsJG on February 18, 2009
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Another Real Life Situation: 24 by MsJG 2-18-09
Reinstalling Windows from XP SP-1 Disk: The following takes place from 9 AM to 9 PM

1218. Thoughtfulness

by LittleRocker on February 16, 2009
Rating: 8.21 (14 votes)

Thoughtfulness by LittleRocker 2-16-09
...Its from Mom Good News or Bad News.	Bad.	She survived the car crash. Fuck.

1219. Muffin/Dance

by muffindance on February 7, 2009
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Muffin/Dance by muffindance 2-07-09
EXCUSE ME, ARE YOU MUFFINDANCE, THE INTERNATIONALLY RENOWNED COMIC STRIP AUTHOR? I HAVE A FEW QUESTIONS I'D LIKE TO ASK	FIRST OF ALL, A NUMBER OF RELIABLE SOURCES CLAIM TO HAVE EVIDENCE OF YOU BEING A FLAMING HOMOSEXUAL. IS THIS TRUE? ABSOLUTELY NOT	OKAY, NEXT QUESTION: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD? COCK

1220. Diversity

by CanadianCheese on February 2, 2009
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Diversity by CanadianCheese 2-02-09
I want to show our clients how diverse our workforce is, so you get to go on our 2009 catalogue cover. How very multicultural of you.	Fantastic. I'll e-mail you instructions after lunch. Whatever.	Great, I got a homosexual. Now to find a black guy.

1221. alan perry: virgin p.i.

by coathangerabortion on January 30, 2009
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

alan perry: virgin p.i. by coathangerabortion 1-30-09
okay ma'am tell me about your roommate. is there anything you can think of that would make someone want to kill her? any suspicious people? come to think of it, she had a big fight with her boyfriend last week. she told him she was pregnant and he wasn't too pleased.	i see... and about your vagina. is it true that the clitoris is located on the outside of the body? my brother said it is but i think he's full of shit	ma'am, witholding evidence from a federal investigation is a serious offense

1222. Once Myspace Knows, The Whole World Knows

by attitudechicka on January 16, 2009
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Once Myspace Knows, The Whole World Knows by attitudechicka 1-16-09
Guess it's time to set all my social networking sites to single... You have 3 new messages!	Hey, I saw you were single and in my area, how do you like this picture of me on my Harley?	Th...There's a motorcycle under there?

1223. Sally Meets Mr. Birdy

by biped on December 9, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Sally Meets Mr. Birdy by biped 12-09-08
Oh goody! It's Mr. Birdy, the talking anti-drugs bird! SQUAWK! Hello, little girl! Don't take drugs!	Because as we all know, drugs are really, really bad for you, and-- Jerry, it's over. I'm leaving you and moving in with Ralph Wilson.	Why, you cocksucking skank whore. You can fucking eat shit and die for all I care.

1224. Professor Know It All

by Hatrix on November 9, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Professor Know It All by Hatrix 11-09-08
Hey kids! It's time for the Professor Know It All show! What's that Assistant Dolly? Why yes today we're... we're...	Oh my stars! Assistant Dolly! You're real! And we really ARE in Science land! This is so magical! I can't believe it! It's true Professor! Your passion for teaching and your love for science made it all real! Show me your love Professor!	So ten minutes into the show he started mumbling and taking his clothes off? Yeah. We cut the feed before he started humping the doll. EMS says it was a stroke or something.

1225. Victims of 9/11 part 10

by Creature_From_Beyond on August 16, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Victims of 9/11 part 10 by Creature_From_Beyond 8-16-08
8:38 AM September 11, 2001 WTC 1 94th floor So, Rick, how is everything? I guess you heard I tried to kill myself last month?	I did, but I wasn't sure if I should bring it up. It's OK, really. I've learned that I need to talk about my feelings and make connections to give meaning and purpose to my life.	It sounds like you've really come a long way! I have. I know that I have a bright future ahead of me and I plan on enjoying every moment of it.

1226. Famous Debates

by seanator on July 29, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Famous Debates by seanator 7-29-08
One fine day... I've killed 10 people in the Bible I've killed 2,391,421	My job is to make everyone hate each other My job is to make everyone love each other	Ironically because I hate faggots

1227. Technowhere - Is It Deductible?

by Hatrix on February 27, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Technowhere - Is It Deductible? by Hatrix 2-27-08
Blargity howl moan bitch crab whine complain wah! My computer!?!?! blarg howl bitch bitchity bitch moan bitch! Fine but if I drop everything to work on your machine first I'm charging you premium rate plus AHT. Altogether it'll be $$$. Do you still want me to do that?	Uh. Um. No. Tomorrow will be fine. That's what I thought.	Hey Red what's an AHT? Asshole tax.

1228. A Dead Crowd

by ZMannZilla on January 31, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

A Dead Crowd by ZMannZilla 1-31-08
So Egon Spengler, Jason Hawes and Pac-Man all walk into a bar...	Booooo! Booooo!	Booooo! I don't get it.

1229. Recitation

by Scyess on January 13, 2008
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Recitation by Scyess 1-13-08
I got a love note from my boyfriend. Want me to read it to you? No.	Roses are red / Violets are blue / I'm into your ass / .... uhhhh... And that's about it.	Okay. Maybe not a "love note" per se... No, it's good. Read the part about your ass again.

1230. At the arcade

by mandingo on November 25, 2007
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

At the arcade by mandingo 11-25-07
i love this game! you get to sit in a car in front of a steering wheel! you have to dodge all the falling bricks and run over as many people as you can before the police catch you!	kill the engine and step out of the vehicle, scumbag!	helicopter bonus round!

1231. Take-your-daughter-to-work day

by mandingo on November 15, 2007
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Take-your-daughter-to-work day by mandingo 11-15-07
i'm on timeout	you put your daughter on timeout, but now i can't get to the copier fine, find me a hanger and a zippo and i'll discipline her the way i used to	you endangered a child so you could make copies of your butt? yeah, but look! i drew little faces on them!

1232. Phil the Wonder Rapist

by The_young_scot on October 6, 2007
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

Phil the Wonder Rapist by The_young_scot 10-06-07
You join us live in the 18th hour of this unprecedented event. Phil seems tense, it could be any moment now..	*POP* He did it! He actually raped that small child into existence!	I can't take my eyes off this show! Honey, are you masturbating to childrensTV?!?

1233. CC: 368 Is That IT?

by Hatrix on September 16, 2007
Rating: 8.08 (13 votes)

CC: 368 Is That IT? by Hatrix 9-16-07