Top Rated Comics Archive

This static page shows every comic captured in sc_toprated_comics when the archive was generated.

2651. Ranger's World (Star Trek for Beginners #14)

by Ranger77 on May 1, 2006
Rating: 7.5 (12 votes)

Ranger's World (Star Trek for Beginners #14) by Ranger77 5-01-06
You may have me imprisoned, but it took four of you to get me in here. You are to be commended, Captain. Your tumbling and judo chops nearly took out half of my security team.	I would have killed those bastards too if my phaser had worked. What are you using, some kind of nullification field? Actually, we aren't using anything like that at all. We were kind of curious about that too....	Sir, there's no sign of the Captain. Funny thing is that his phaser is still here, but I can't find the keyless entry control for the shuttlecraft. Well. That pretty much explains the abnormal shuttle door activity I've been trying figure out FOR THE LAST TEN FUCKING MINUTES!!!

2652. critoris

by mandingo on August 24, 2005
Rating: 7.5 (12 votes)

critoris

find it aready!

by mandingo, 8-24-05

2653. Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille"

by Ranger77 on November 12, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (12 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "HeroVille" by Ranger77 11-12-04
So when's the invasion. We must prepare the team to repel.... There isn't going to be an invasion. The alien forgot a set of keys here in the ship. By the way, during the LAST invasion how many aliens did you actually see?	I'm not exactly sure. I.... You saw two. TWO aliens. There was never an invasion. It was only something the alien's leader called his "Master Plan."	Aha! Master Plan, eh? I knew they.... Calm down, tiger. The master plan was to come to earth, say the ship was stolen and report the loss to his insurance company. Evidently he had too many miles on this thing....

2654. The Secret Starfleet Academy Diary of James T. K.

by DrMorton on November 11, 2007
Rating: 7.5 (12 votes)

The Secret Starfleet Academy Diary of James T. K. by DrMorton 11-11-07
Dear diary! Oh the waves of joy and excitement rushing through my body today when I finally dared to beam into fellow cadet Spock´s dormitory right the moment he prepared to go to bed!	The look he gave me - so innocent and unsuspecting, yet so full of secret knowledge - sent shivers down my spine. When I approached him I feared my trembling feet could fail me any moment!	Then I kicked him in the nuts and beamed out before he could react with that Vulcan death grip of his. That´s what you get for copying my moves in the Annual Starfleet Zero Gravity Ballet Contest!

2655. Ranger's World presents: "Yep, it's true!"

by Ranger77 on June 30, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (12 votes)

Ranger's World presents: "Yep, it's true!" by Ranger77 6-30-04
As overheard outside a showing of 'Farenheit 9/11'.... Well if taken for what it was, at least it's provoking discussions about what's going on with the Iraq. Yeah, but dude if the present administration focused half as much energy on banning guns we wouldn't need fascist policy like the Patriot Act.	That's a bit simplistic. Besides some see gun ownership as a right. Well if they don't give them up we should force them to. You know....maybe even form a domestic authority to kick down a few doors look for them if necessary.	"Domestic authority" and questionable search and seizure. You haven't really READ the Patriot Act have you? Nope. I just don't like the name.

2656. Untitled

by batFucker on June 20, 2004
Rating: 7.5 (12 votes)

Untitled by batFucker 6-20-04
i went to the store earlier to buy a new pair of pants. i was testing out a pair, you know, seeing if they were what i wanted, but these fucking asshole store security fags came and escorted me out.	ok, ok. maybe i shouldn't have been in the little boy's dressing room...	masturbating.

2657. bilal and korfeg 5

by alkoholik on December 23, 2003
Rating: 7.5 (12 votes)

bilal and korfeg 5 by alkoholik 12-23-03
korfeg, what are you doing? sssh....im pretending	what are you pretending? that im a robot	well you dont seem to be doing much thats what it looks like when robots jack off

2658. CC575: Should have just registered somewhere

by evil_d on March 25, 2014
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

CC575: Should have just registered somewhere by evil_d 3-25-14
Dear Aunt Linda: Thank you for the twenty dollars. I'll be sure to think of you as I play the first third of the new Battlefield game.	Dear Grandpa: Five dollars?? I'm sure when you were a kid this would have bought a year's supply of candy, but today it doesn't buy the 'T' in Toblerone.	Billy, I read some of your thank-you notes and we need to talk. Dear Mom: Fifty bucks? If you want me to move out, you'll have to do better than that.

2659. Conversations with my wiccan friend

by deathtoradio on September 8, 2011
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Conversations with my wiccan friend by deathtoradio 9-08-11
So...what's the deal with the salt along the bottom of the door that leads to the basement? There's SOMETHING down there and it's not human.	Pest control situation. Gotcha. No, you don't understand...there's SOMETHING down there.	Yeah...that's generally what basements are for. That still doesn't tell me why you decided to season the doorway with salt. Jesus! Nevermind.

2660. CC469 Brad should enter more CCs

by RCCOLAMAN on February 3, 2011
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

CC469 Brad should enter more CCs by RCCOLAMAN 2-03-11
T...	ES..	T...

2661. I'd really like a bread maker

by UncleTerwilliger on August 18, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

I'd really like a bread maker by UncleTerwilliger 8-18-10
Knock Knock Who's there?	One of the perks of your future life as a stripper.	The Clap who?

2662. CC 454: Aquapun

by kaufman on June 21, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

CC 454: Aquapun by kaufman 6-21-10
Hello, is this Ian Anderson, legendary singer and musician from Jethro Tull? Yes it is. How may I help you?	I'm going to be juggling a bunch of rock star memorabilia. So far I've lined up Bob Dylan's harmonica, Ted Nugent's chainsaw, ... Madonna's brassiere, Ringo's drumsticks, Pink Floyd's pig, Keith Richards' dad's ashes, ...	Somehow, I knew he'd approve. And to round it off, I'd like to add your 45 rpm single of "Video Killed the Radio Star". May I add it into the act? Buggles in the juggle? Well, that's alright by me!

2663. Reality Show's Final Round

by Neo11 on May 24, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Reality Show's Final Round by Neo11 5-24-10
OK contestants, in our final event for the $100,000, we will see who can withstand the heat in a 250 degree sauna the longest Oh yeah, that money is mine!	This is gonna be so easy-you guys are going down!	SON OF A BITCH!

2664. Mein Kampf

by seanator on April 14, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Mein Kampf

One fine day... I wish Hitler had a mullet, that way I wouldn't have to see them anymore.

by seanator, 4-14-10

2665. Every job is exactly the same.

by seanator on April 1, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Every job is exactly the same. by seanator 4-01-10
One fine day... I can tell by the turkey on your crotch that this is your first gangbang film.	Yeah, I'm new here. It's not too difficult is it? Of course not, the boss is sort of a douche though, oh crap here he comes!	Working hard or hardly jerking?

2666. CC 448: Who Blesses the Blessers?

by kaufman on March 27, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

CC 448: Who Blesses the Blessers? by kaufman 3-27-10
aah-aah-aaah .....		oops. Gesundheit.

2667. CC 443 - rejected religion names

by lukket on January 6, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

CC 443 - rejected religion names by lukket 1-06-10
My religion is about using Apple products to hit other people. I call it iSlam. My religion is based on pure science, and I call it Scientology.	My religion is based on the notion that all humans are just cut out figures that are manipulated by several gods. I call it Stripcreationism. My religion holds alcohol as the primary and holiest lifeform, and we call it Alcoholism.	In my religion we believe that everyone is just buddies, so it's called Buddism. My religion mixes the teachings of Jesus with Japanese Buddhism. I call it Christianzen.

2668. cc443: Church of Balls

by mandingo on January 2, 2010
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

cc443: Church of Balls by mandingo 1-02-10
so why should i join the Church of Balls? well, unlike the corrupt Catholic church which tithes 10%, i tithe 15% and give 5% back	but that still comes to 10% sure, but it's like getting a thousand dollars back at a car dealership. you still know you're being raped in the ass, but there's enough of a reach around that you can live with it	alright, i'm in. grab the sex wax and shoe polish and wait in the barn with the others

2669. Real Life: Puppet Master

by four_legged_tripod on October 21, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Real Life: Puppet Master by four_legged_tripod 10-21-09
How 'bout this one? Would you please stop?	This one then. You've got to love this one. Again, I'm asking you to give this up.	Would you prefer it if I found some Barbie clothes? Look, just because you pronounce it "Hallo-weenie" does NOT mean your penis needs its own costume!

2670. Interior Decorating

by Hari_Nezumi on July 23, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Interior Decorating by Hari_Nezumi 7-23-09
Hey there babe, does the carpet match the drapes?		Yep.

2671. Watching way too much Tim Vine

by lima on June 8, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Watching way too much Tim Vine by lima 6-08-09
Come here Elsie! Come here Daisy! Come here Elsie! Come here Daisy! Come here Elsie! Come here Daisy!	Come here Elsie! Come here Daisy! Come here Elsie! Come here Daisy!	You'll be saying that 'til the cows come home.

2672. Texts in my Phone at 1 AM

by LuckyGuess on May 25, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Texts in my Phone at 1 AM by LuckyGuess 5-25-09
goddamn i do anything to give you a bj right now. Anything to hear those moans and please you.	It makes me happy to make you happy. I fucking tremble when I think about it.	Text me back anything but "score."

2673. Mate

by Aylear on March 30, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Mate by Aylear 3-30-09
I wonder if future generations will miss playing chess. Miss playing?	Well, even today, our imperfect chess programs are stronger than humans. One day we'll solve it. It follows that our electronic implants will help us solve such intricate problems on the fly. Allowing for perfect games. Nice. It's a theory with interesting implications. Like, what kind of impossibly complex games will be invented to replace chess and challenge future humans?	4D Chess. Bishop to 1955, Mate?

2674. That Guy

by Hari_Nezumi on March 2, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

That Guy by Hari_Nezumi 3-02-09
...and he really wanted me to buy him this car, but I told him the cost was just too big and we couldn't fit it in. That's what SHE said!	...but the whole situation got a little sticky in the end, so we just decided to call it a night. That's what SHE said!	...so I began to scream for him to stop as blood sprayed everywhere, but he just kept going with this crazed look on his face. That's what SHE...uh...

2675. Heat wave

by dcomposed on February 8, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Heat wave by dcomposed 2-08-09
Be on the look out because in this hot weather all the spiders will be trying to hide from the heat in our house and we have to defend. This heat wave fucking sucks!	...the death toll from wildfires has rising to 76... HOLY SHIT!!!!	What's going on? BIG FUCKING SPIDER JUST CRAWELED OUT FROM BEHIND THE TV!!!!

2676. WW 68: Beautiful Island

by 100Faces on January 20, 2009
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

WW 68: Beautiful Island by 100Faces 1-20-09
	See? That's my favourite fantasy about me and you. Don't you ever picture yourself on a beautiful island with me? Occasionally.

2677. Columns A & B

by vagrancy on December 11, 2008
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Columns A & B by vagrancy 12-11-08
Well, marriage is such a far off topic for me. I see. We're in our mid twenties now, I feel like it's bound to happen soon.	Oh wow. You sound serious. I'm getting there. I adore the idea of being married.	Well, what's stopping you? Well, I can't decide if I want to be the bride or the groom.

2678. Where are They Now: Tootsie Blow Pop Cast

by Tterb on September 21, 2008
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Where are They Now: Tootsie Blow Pop Cast by Tterb 9-21-08
Mr. Owl, How many licks does it take to get the center of a Tootsie Blow Pop?	Denis, I dont do that anymore. I have a family now... But Mr. Owl remeber the good old days. Come on just one more time.	God Damnit Denis! I don't do The Blow anymore. Get the hell out of here!

2679. CC399: One fine day in a book store

by fpd on September 3, 2008
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

CC399: One fine day in a book store by fpd 9-03-08
Hi, I'm looking for something, uh, you know, sinfully sexy. You're looking for Sinfully Sexy by Linda Francis Lee?	You do Supergirl fantiasies? This is so great! Doing it with Supergirl has always been one of my biggest fantasies! Sir, this is a book store, not a brothel.	Huh? You're a book whore, aintcha?

2680. Pimpburger II

by Ogyaf on August 31, 2008
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Pimpburger II by Ogyaf 8-31-08
Yeah, Swerve, my new job here is going great. Good. Oh, here comes your boss. You better look like you're working.	Word, dawg. Fo'shizzle, know wha' I'm sayin', G? Mad flava up in herr, playa!	Solid work, brah. Yo, check it. You gettin' a raise.

2681. Kimkim: Dorkemon Trainer #1

by ZMannZilla on April 5, 2008
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

Kimkim: Dorkemon Trainer #1 by ZMannZilla 4-05-08
Ha! My solar powered Snatchmaster 9K has allowed me to steal your Brainicon, Kimkim! TEAM BADGUY SHALL OWN ALL DORKEMON! *sigh* Oh my, thwarted once again by Team Badguy and their superior technology.	Wait, isn't this the part where you pull out, like a Zapachoo or a Gengizkahn or something and try to take your Brainicon back? Why bother? I can just fly to Brainicon Cave, walk around for five minutes and catch another one. They're really quite common, and Dorkeballs only cost like $5 a piece.	That Snatchmaster thingee looks expensive. Did it have to be shaped like a giant gold-plated Meowcat?

2682. AS IT IS FOR THE REST OF YOU CRETINS

by FactoryRejects on April 4, 2008
Rating: 7.5 (10 votes)

AS IT IS FOR THE REST OF YOU CRETINS by FactoryRejects 4-04-08
Nilnar Reederspat reporting, Master Tol. I'm afraid the-	I'm already well aware of your failure, Nilnar	It's plastered all over your myspace page